Verbally abusive patient, worried I could have handled the situation better

Nurses General Nursing

Published

Let me start out by saying this is a little long winded, but it has been weighing on me and I have to get it off my chest, so bear with me!!!

So, my last shift, I had gotten report on a male patient in his 60s, totally A&O, on our floor for anasarca. PMH of chf, alcohol and IV drug abuse, and hep c (from what I remember.). I work on a busy cardiac unit. This man had been sent to us from the icu on a bumex drip with a foley due to retention, along with a fluid restriction. He had to have assistance to get up, but could make it around just fine with his walker once up. The report I had gotten from the night nurse said he was a jerk, and noncompliant with the fluid restriction of 1000 cc among other things.

So first thing (before I had made it into his room), my charge nurse passes his room and he asks for coffee, she says she has to ask his primary nurse because he is on a fluid restriction. This sets him off, he begins to yell and curse so loudly, I can hear him from 2 rooms down through the closed door. So, then I go to the room. He politely asked for coffee. I politely said back, "ok, let me check the chart and see how much fluid you are at so far because you are on a restriction." This sets him off. He shoves his bedside table towards me, knocking off some of the remnants from his breakfast tray towards me. He begins to curse at me, saying things like "you stupid f***ing nurse" being the primary phrase. So, I calmly say "there is no reason to be this way to me, to be cursing at me. I will come back after you calm down." So I leave and close the door, and he is still cursing. About 5 minutes later, the tech told him that she would have to check with me before she could give him coffee, and he went off again, yelling and cursing so loudly that other patients and families were complaining. So, my charge nurse and I agreed we should call security. He arrives, and handles the situation well. The patient kept saying, over and over, "get me the hell out of here." So, in short, he ripped his tele leads off and began to pull on his IVs and foley. The physician came to the room and spoke with him, saying in short that he was welcome to leave if he did not want to comply with treatment, he could not treat staff that way, etc. so he agreed, yes he wanted to leave. The security officer and the physician said they agreed he should leave. So I removed the two IVs and the foley. While I am doing this, the PHYSICIAN brings him a cup of coffee and a cup of water (roughly 500 cc, he was already around 400 cc so far before this). While I was removing his foley, (he was sitting on the edge of the bed), he threw the cup of water over my head against the wall, but I was soaked. At this point I left the room fuming, and let the officer speak with him. He was saying he now wanted to stay since we gave him his coffee. THIS is the part I am questioning myself about-I told him "no sir, I have already removed everything and you have signed the paper to leave. The cab is on its way to pick you up." He did leave, and had to have assistance from the tech and officer to transfer from a wheelchair to the cab.

I had a hard time leaving some of the things he said to/about me at work that day. (I.e. You fata**, you shouldn't be a nurse, f***ing dumb nurse, I could go on). Remember, this man was as oriented as he could be, and was able to hold a calm conversation with others during this time. Probably some undiagnosed psych issues or something. I have never had anyone speak so poorly about me. So, yes I am glad he left within the first 2 hours of my shift, BUT my conscience keeps hanging on three things: one, that he wasn't able to walk on his own and we just sent him on his way. Two, that the foley was there for retention and it was removed almost immediately before he left. And three, that in the end I kind of told him he had to leave (I think he probably would have anyways).

Thank you if you have read this whole thing, I tried to condense as much as I could! Let me know what you think, if something could have been handled differently, etc.

Specializes in Critical Care; Cardiac; Professional Development.
Now, the following is...sort of on topic:

Suppose this patient were to return and end up on the OP's unit, again...Can the OP refuse to be his nurse, especially since he assaulted her during a previous admission? Or, even if he did not assault her but was verbally abusive while A&Ox4?

I guess it depends on the facility, but I have always refused to take a patient back that was abusive to me.

"He was saying he now wanted to stay since we gave him his coffee. THIS is the part I am questioning myself about-I told him "no sir, I have already removed everything and you have signed the paper to leave. The cab is on its way to pick you up." He did leave, and had to have assistance from the tech and officer to transfer from a wheelchair to the cab. "

Did YOUR patient ask to stay?Was YOUR patient too weak to ambulate alone? So many risk factors and legal ramifications over a mis -handled cup of coffee request.

I would be concerned about liability if he said he wanted to stay and then something happened to him after he left.

I would have contacted the doctor and see what she had to say about it.

CYA.

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Now, the following is...sort of on topic:

Suppose this patient were to return and end up on the OP's unit, again...Can the OP refuse to be his nurse, especially since he assaulted her during a previous admission? Or, even if he did not assault her but was verbally abusive while A&Ox4?

It depends on the staffing situation and how sympathetic the charge nurse is.

Specializes in Pediatric Critical Care.

Did YOUR patient ask to stay?Was YOUR patient too weak to ambulate alone? So many risk factors and legal ramifications over a mis -handled cup of coffee request.

I mean....technically he wasn't anybody's patient at that point. He had been discharged. He was her former patient, I suppose.

I don't know, I am not on board with "just giving the guy his coffee." If you were to give him his coffee and make him go over his restriction, you would be directly breaking a physician's order. I think the only thing different I would have done was to talk to the doctor about either increasing the restriction or lifting it completely. I think they're BS anyways. Seriously? You think we are going to work our asses off tuning someone up who is so grossly non-compliant and they're NOT going to just go right home and drink their heart into oblivion? Yeah right. I wouldn't have given him coffee either. I would have said, "I just barely met you, I don't know anything about you or your case. You just got here. I am going to need about 10 minutes to look at your chart. I can even stay right here and look at it right here if you'd like?" What a tool. I'm sorry that happened to you!

Sometimes our patients are having the worst day of their lives. They're frightened, they're frustrated, and acting out may be the one way they have of feeling like they have some sort of control. As much as it may not look that way, in our relationships with our patients, the power is disproportionately ours, and that can be hard to swallow for the one without the power. Indeed, we sometimes feel like we are powerless and have to kowtow to get those patient satisfaction score, which makes us want to act out a little, too.

In times like these, it's very important to understand that people may be dealing inappropriately with their anxieties and stress because they just don't know any other way. Nor is it wrong to step away a moment, take a cleansing breath, and keep in mind that some of these people were probably jerks long before we ever met them, and will be long after they're discharged.

You are wonderful re: understanding. However, neither OP nor any other nurse is required to be afraid for his or her physical safety. We're nurses, not police. Nurses, not in combat.

His damned doctor totally disrespected the staff, who were trying to carry out the doctor's orders. So now the staff look like idiots, sadists while the doctor looks stupid but heroic.

I am glad OP told him to begone. She now needs to let the doctor know that he made her look ridiculous and that she now doesn't know which orders he wants followed and which he doesn't.

To be honest, I would have just given him the cup of coffee when he asked for it, and educated him on his fluid restriction and why it is in place. If he wants to follow it great and if he doesn't you can inform the physician and document.

I think that everyone saying let me ask your nurse/let me check your chart/let me talk to the doctor probably made him feel like people were avoiding him and his request.

So you would have given in to his babyish demands and not followed orders? That would leave you open to claims of negligence or malpractice I think because you handed him the coffee or whatever liquids.

YES lol-it is a female hospitalist and she is sometimes very good at throwing nurses under the bus, others she acts like your best friend.

Report her to the powers that be. Also, sit her down and inform her that she is creating confusion about which orders she really wants followed.

Better yet, wake her up a few times per night, call her every 1/2 hour during the day and ask for clarification because her pt is thirsty. Or whatever else you can question. LOLOLOL

Gotta train them, you know.

Let me add one more thing - your original question was something like, "Could I have handled it better?"

Of course. We all could handle 80% of of our patient interactions better.

A more relevant question is, "SHOULD I have handled it better?"

Maybe I'm just at the end of my patience allowance for the month, but...my vote is no. Some people just need to be shown the door.

I think I handle at least 80% of my interactions well.

Any patient has the right to refuse a doctor's prescribed treatment. YOU had no right to refuse the patient's request. It's a hospital, not a jail.

"but could that have made him stay longer in the day, and then I would have had to deal with him even longer?"

This is not about you, it's about the patient. You basically bounced out a patient that was not ready to go home, that even rescinded his own discharge and was visibly too weak to manage his own care... because your feelings were hurt.

Talk to your risk manager, make sure your malpractice insurance is in effect.

I have to disagree, BTDT.

The patient can refuse treatment, but the nurse has to follow orders. OP had every right to try to follow orders.

When the patient is a safety threat, when he starts battering her, it is indeed about the nurse/staff.

She didn't bounce anyone. The doctor released him. She had her manager's blessing, too. Patient can always come back anyway.

Did the doctor give the patient coffee AFTER she had written the discharge order? I guess I thought that was how it happened, but maybe not.

If it happened that way, I took it as the MD's way of saying: Bye-bye fella, and good luck to you!

But if she brought the coffee BEFORE the discharge order was written, then I would speak to her.

While it is commendable that you are analyzing your behavior, OP, I really hope you won't sweat this one too much.

The patient was alert and oriented and sometimes you can't save people from themselves because they aren't looking to be saved.

Report her to the powers that be. Also, sit her down and inform her that she is creating confusion about which orders she really wants followed.

Better yet, wake her up a few times per night, call her every 1/2 hour during the day and ask for clarification because her pt is thirsty. Or whatever else you can question. LOLOLOL

Gotta train them, you know.

Kooky...

Come on, you don't really mean that, do you? She'd already discharged the guy, after telling him that he may NOT treat staff that way.

I'll take that for support, in a heartbeat. I would've brought him the coffee myself at that point, seriously.

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