No more visitors EVER!

[canoehead]

Well I had a hell of a night in OB, a sullen rude labor patient even after the epidural, and whining about keeping the moniter belts on- yes they HAVE to be there. Her SO pissed and moaned about it taking so long ("when do you think this will be over?") I offered to get him the stuff for a shower and some slippers so her could get more comfortable. So I do all that and he leaves soggy towels on the floor and asks for a pillow- wjich I get- and no thank you or kiss my ass.

So meanwhile she's stopped dilating, ctx are irregular, FHR baseling is up 20 from what it was, no accels, intermittent decels of all types, and variability sometimes not so hot...hmmm. And I'm keeping track of all this, plus her whining, plus the 6-7 people going in and out, and WAKING her, after complainging that she's been up for days. And the OB says "just 2 people in the room" as we've been saying all day. So a couple of them come in and quiz me up about just HOW LONG will this take, as they have been here all day.

Well I say, if we could start pushing now, 1h pushing, and possibly as long as 1h stitching and clean up before the whole clan will be OK to come in. WHY she asks, arguing the pt doesn't care if we see her splayed out to the world (well I do!) And I don't need 6-7 visitors to trip over while I resuscitate this kid, and it's for mom's safety etc. Well sh'e not buying it- "Can't I just peek in???"

All OB nurses know where that road leads, esp with 5 others in the hall just wanting a "quick peek" too. Get the cameras and videotape...

So I explain we just need that time to get everything settled, and then the free for all will be open. (not good enough for her) She goes down the hall and I hear her mimicking me, esp the part where I say she's welcome to spend as much time as she wants now supporting mom. (They want to see the good stuff)

So anyway, mom delivers by Csection, bleeds out and the HCT is 10 points lower than baseline, baby has Apgars of 2,3,5 and 8. And the family follows us like puppys staring in windows, craning their necks past drawn blinds, and FOB jumps in the bed bedside mom's and goes to sleep, without coming in to see babe, or waiting for the transport team. Oh yeah- when I go in to get a consent to transport he requests...a pillow. And there they are, three pillows, right on the chair at the foot of the bed.

And we have NO security, I am the labor, and NICU nurse and my fellow RN is OR gofer, 2nd baby resuscitator and postpartum nurse. Supervisor comes to help but has to cover the house in addition so we have to move fairly fast.

IAM NOT YOUR MAID! I AM ACTUALLY MAKING DECISIONS THAT WILL AFFECT THE LIFE AND HEALTH OF THIS MOM AND BABY!

And if we need less than a posse in the labor room to allow us to think straight for just an hour-jeez is that too much to ask? I am ready to put huge deadbolts on all the labor room doors- once you go out- that's it baby.

Sorry about the rant, and thanks for listening.

Canoe

Not to mention the doc who wants to put in a UV- has never done it before in the 7 years I've worked at this hospital. Arghhh.

[Susan M]

Not a bad idea Gary. Think our Mr Blair would go for it over here? Me neither. Pity. Susan xx

[KarafromPhilly]

I'm sure that I will make myself extremely unpopular by saying this, but if you don't want to be treated like a maid, then don't behave like one. You have no right to complain that pushy, tacky people are making unreasonable requests if you turn around and do whatever they ask. You are a professional. Act like one. Do not allow yourself to be taken advantage of. If you do, it is your own fault.

[mark_LD_RN]

sounds like a lot of families i deal with here!

[mark_LD_RN]

Kara that is easier said then done. often you refuse to honor their requests you get a complaint filed. one hospital i worked at ever complaint filed got put in your file and you also had to give written explanation of what happened to many complaints , no raise or worse. so it was not worth the trouble to fight them.it usually did no good any way they are just plain old ignorant

[pebbles, BSN, RN]

Just had to agree with the title of this thread.... sigh.

A busy day in the trauma stepdown unit... climbing over or around visitors to take vitals and do turns and mobilization, even DB&C. They act like it's such an imposition to ask them to step out of the room for a minute.... "entitled" is the right word, for sure. I wish I had more support from mangagement in limiting vising hours further... "visiting hours" are 11-1430 and 16-2030... but the patients are imposed upon by the family to stay awake and be entertaining for that entire time.... and the visitors often won't leave or show up early...

my manager takes all family concerns very seriously... over and above pt and nursing concerns....

[KarafromPhilly]

OK, but if family member files complaint saying, "Nurse refused to bring me ice water while my wife was in labor" or "My sister, husband, brother, two nieces, and grandson were refused admittance while my daughter gave birth", are these not self-explanatory "complaints"? I mean, there is a NURSING SHORTAGE going on. If we allow ourselves to be treated like sh-t when we have the power to ask for ANYTHING and GET IT, when will people respect nurses?

Must clarify one thing--I didn't mean you personally, Shay. I'm talking generally, among the profession as a whole. Sorry I didn't make that clear.

[pebbles, BSN, RN]

Naw, I think they make more generic complaints a lot of the time.... "that nurse was rude to me", etc.... My co-worker today was very upset about being told off by our manager after a family complained that he ws "abrupt"...

[mark_LD_RN]

the complaints filed are usually give very little detail. that is part of the problem. I do not let my self be treated lik s$%^ but sometimes you have to think is it worth it. patient today are made to think they are entitled. i get all kinda requests from family etc. i even get requests that i feel patients could and should do for their self. one example had a patient call me to room at 6:30 am, requesting i do her peri care for her. mind you this is a patient who is 36 hours or more after a normal lady partsl delivery with no stitches or anything. when i ask her to do it she simply stated she was tired and did not want to do my job for me. well i just cleaned her and politely told her to get used to doing it for herself because she was going home in a couple of hours. this is just one of many such examples. I do not have them time usually to explain and debate the issue with patients or family. and i do not know when nurses will get the respect they deserve.

[KarafromPhilly]

Heck, ask her who washes her when she is at home, and would it be possible for that person to come in today and take care of her, because you are just SOOOO busy this morning? You would appreciate it very much, etc. All the while being extremely polite, smiling, and STARING at her to let her know that she had better back the ^$% down, because you are NOT GOING TO. Works wonders. (Being passive aggressive is FUN!)

Besides, if they treat you like a slave, you are almost certainly not the only one. They can't complain about EVERYONE, can they? ("Everyone who works here is rude." )

Besides, IMHO most crazy people don't bother to complain--they're too busy driving a new bunch of people to distraction (at the bank, grocery store, child's school, their own job, their own family, etc.)

[OrthoNutter]

Originally posted by fedupnurse

NEVER say never. My suggestion when I chaired a visiting hour committee was the 6th Thursday of the 13th month of the year but only during leap year. That was when they could come out of the wood work. And they could call during the 25th hour but that was any day of the week.

Sad thing. I was dead serious when I said it at that meeting. That was how bad a week I had with numerous families on my unit.

Hmmmphhh.....what happened to the whole 'at the nurses' discretion' bit??? That's what we have at our hospital....we have visiting hours.....but there's always the disclaimer on the door that nursing discretion applies. If I find anyone bypassing the desk during visiting hours, let alone before, they get Q&A as I'm running past with a bedpan, vomit bowl or God knows what other disgusting object I can grab in a moment's notice to turn them away. I don't buy the whole "I'm only coming for a minute" or "she really needs me" or whatever. I keep to the visiting hours and if I think a pt really can't take one more gawker waking them up, then I pull the curtains, close the door (if in the iso rooms) and hang the "procedure in progress - please respect privacy" sign. I don't care anymore if people's feelings are hurt when I tell them politely to come back at a more appropriate time than 3am. I don't care if they write a letter to the member of parliament about the dragon nurse of the ortho ward who wouldn't let them visit granny at 4am on a Sunday morning when they'd been out on the grog and lurching up the corridor. If it's not in the pt's best interest, then I'm sorry - here's where the door is and don't let it hit you on the butt on the way out. I'm prepared to make exceptions for the relatives and friends of fragile or critical patients to come outside of those hours but not to the extent that it either compromises the quality of my care or the pt's health. Cranky and overbearing??? You betcha....but at least my pts never complain about how their family always disturbs them just when they get to sleep....

Can you tell I've had a visitors day from hell??? :chuckle

[alwaysthere]

oh come on you mean nurses,

theres no reason why you shouldnt have to step over ten people to take your pt's V.S. , change medicate or bathe them, you should always have and audience to tell you how to do your job because apperanlty all those years of nursing school and experience dosnt qualify you to care for their relative, whom they brought to the hospital anyway.

Yeah bad night w/visitors, too ! sigh :chuckle:

[thisnurse]

i was just wondering if she planned on breastfeeding...lol