My morale is in the toilet!

  1. Two more nurses just resigned this week. I completely understand their need to do what they need to do, one is moving out of state. It is the latest in a rash of resignations, and, since I am usually the one doing the resigning (nearing a one year anniversary, a big step for me in the last 5 years!), I am surprised by how bad I feel watching some really good, no make that excellent nurses leave!!

    If I hear one more person resign, I think I'll burst into tears!!

    Anybody else feel this way? How do you get thru it? I am bummed!
  2. Visit hoolahan profile page

    About hoolahan

    Joined: Dec '99; Posts: 3,786; Likes: 129
    Quality Nurse & Home Health Nurse


  3. by   micro
    I can relate...................
  4. by   shay
    Well, Linda, I can honestly say I know exactly what you're going through. I mean EXACTLY.

    Unfortunately, both times this has been the case, that is, watching nurse after nurse after nurse leave in frustration, I usually was soon to follow their ranks. The situation at those two hospitals was just horrible, though.

    If the situation is good, but these nurses are just leaving for personal reasons (moving out of state, etc.) well then, the way I get through it when THAT happens is to just try to appreciate the people around me who are still there even more. I try to make sure the nurses I still work with know how much I enjoy working with them, etc., and keep reminding myself that there will soon be another wonderful nurse to take the place of those who have left. I remind myself of how my closest friendships have evolved, and keep in mind that the next nurse who walks through that door could be just as wonderful as the one who last left.

    Bond with those around you, and keep your chin up. I also like to say the serenity prayer to myself often in times like that.....

    Hang in there....
  5. by   MHN
    Hoolahan, when I left my last post start psych training the director of nursing on my exit interview said she was reassured that i was not leaving nursing but changing specialties and learning new skills.
    I know before i left when others left some of us were almost jealous that they had had the "courage" to do so.
    Sometimes we can also see the aditional work we are going to have to do and that can be a problem for dedicated staff because they have their set of ideals and work ethics that they see as not being able to be kept .
    The staff then may suffer from anxiety or depression especially if their goals are being blocked.The main goal being the delivery of optimal nursing care to their patients.
    Sometimes it doesn't hurt to see staff counsellor to express your feelings I know this can work and sometimes the counsellor can present the problem to admininistration in an annonomous and confidential manner.
    Last of all " A problem shared is a problem divided "
  6. by   Huganurse
    Dear Hoolihan, I know what you are going through, it is so nice to work with people you know and trust. It's never easy to loose an experienced nurse who fits like a cog in the wheel. I worked with the a core group of nurses in HHC, there were 5 of us, for several years. We grew close, shared duties, traded OC time, gave each other visits when we were low, (this was when we got paid per visit so they were essentially giving away the bread and butter to help the other), and covered time off. We loved working with each other. When the time came for someone to leave, we did cry, and the person leaving was crying and apologizing too. To be honest with you, it was never the same again. After all was said and done the big corp guys tore us apart and then there was none. I basically left FT HHC after that and have only the great memories of working with those terrific people. We all moved on, and b/c of our HHC experience we were able to land some great jobs. We still run into each other occasionally and it is fun to catch up on old times. Try to keep you chin up b/c I believe everything happens for a reason, and opportunity may be lurking just around the corner.
  7. by   Reabock
    Hoolihan: I too, can relate. Last month I completed my 25th anniversary at the same facility. Over that time I have made many friends and seen most of them leave for greener pastures for varied personal reasons, some because of family situations and moving out of the area or because they did not feel challanged enough at our institution. Some I even encouraged them to go simply because I knew they would stagnate here and I hate for that to happen. Another just had her last night with us last night. She is starting her last year in a 4 year BSN program and was working as an Aide, got a chance for an Internship at a hospital 45 miles away where she will work one on one with another seasoned nurse 3 weeks each in 3 areas of her choice.

    Nothing we could offer or she says she would stay, it also will help get some of her loans forgiven, so its a win, win situation for her and a real loss for us as we all loved working with her. I find myself not getting very chummy with new folks right off anymore as it does hurt when they leave and in this area we usually lose contact due to it being a rural area. I wish I had kept a list of all the wonderful people I have worked with over the years and are now elsewhere Sometimes I wonder why I stay, but work is only 5 miles from home and I guess I am just in a comfortable rut. Got my evaluation last night, good by the way, and when she asked did I have any personal goals for the new year, I said "no, my goal was to get to my 25 year anniversary without this place killing me and I achieved that".
  8. by   hoolahan
    Thanks guys! I haven't experienced this before. I stayed at one place for 13 years, but moved around to diff positions and units, but always the same family of faces. It was such a good place to work, few people did leave. I only did b/c I had a chance to start up a new cardiac surg unit in a hosp 7 miles from home. But, it just wasn't the same, and I needed a real change. Since then, 1998, I have moved once or twice a year to a new position, found HH, moved to an insur co, back to HH, then a sup position in another agency, then back for a weekend program in present HH co for the thrid round, and frankly, I am tired of having to prove myself over and over, and this job, while the paperwork and other politics at work are very frustrating, it works so well with my family life. I got to get my charts for today last night, did my visits before 1p and still got to my dtr's dance competition at 2:15. So, I can't beat the flexibility.

    Many of my friends echoed some sentiments here, telling me they thought I was so brave for leaving and doing new things. I never ever thought of myself that way, I just liked learning new things. I am always amazed at nurses who stay in places for a long time despite not being happy. B/c to me, I have to be happy, or I can't stay. In the last 3 months, 3 RN's quit out of frustration, one retired and one is moving out of state. The 3 RN's who left out of frustration are all such wonderful nurses, and taught me so much about HH. I honestly thought they would never leave, but they did.

    And you are right also when you say the remaining nurses look at that nurses drawer of cases and think, OMG, who's gonna pick up all these pt's?? As it turns out, they moved a nurse from the other team to our team, and she is taking those cases, I didn't even get one. But having taken over the cases of 2 of the other nurses who left, it's not easy to slip into their shoes. Patients become attached to their nurses, and it takes time to build rapport and trust.

    I just know I will miss them, esp the latest nurse to retire, I really learned a lot from her, and she will really be missed.

    I guess bonding with the remaining nurses is a good thing. I'm just afraid everyone will get discouraged and also resign. I want to stick around until at least November and make 1 1/2 years at one place in a row!!!

    Thanks for all your words of encouragement. :kiss
  9. by   mother/babyRN
    I have been thinking of that sort of thing myself, until recently, when I realized if I leave it will be on MY terms and not on theirs. To that end, we are starting to utilize our union whenEVER there is a grievable offense, and we are WINNING! Like the movie says (Network) We're mad as hell and we aren't going to take it anymore! You can only fall as far as you allow management to push you......Glad I stayed and joined in to affect change...Hang in there....
  10. by   mother/babyRN
    Sounds like you are having a hard time..Some one mentioned to me that especially with nurses, because of what we do and how most of us end up relating to each others, as family, that there is a grieving process that happens when people leave...They will forever remain in your hearts and they will take some part of you with them in their hearts wherever they go....
  11. by   mario_ragucci
    Another one bites the dust, and another one gone, and another one gone, another one bites the dust, hey-hey.

    Every new beginning starts from some other begining's end
  12. by   NRSKarenRN
    Sending {{{{{HUG}}}}} your way. Still sense your trying to find the perfect niche. I know you LOVE home care for the ability to make that one-on-one connection and make a difference.

    What is it in your life that makes accepting change so difficult... approaching middle years stretch.... recent deaths/illness of patients.... lack of office support?

    I've found that accepting that change is a way of life, being aware of my surroundings so I can dive in and swim with the current instead of against it , having the BIG picture of healthcare today and letting go of what I can not change has helped me be more settled. I've learned that money isn't all and a balanced work/family life is what's most important. Best wishes.
  13. by   Fgr8Out
    {{{{ Hoolahan }}}}

    Are YOU happy in your current setting? If you are... try to take comfort in that because, as you well know, that isn't very often the case for many nurses of late.

    Keep the memory of your newly gone co-workers alive by remembering what it is about them that made you so enjoy their presence... and look forward to the new experiences and learning opportunities (or opportunities for YOU to teach) with those nurses who will most certainly be your future co-workers.

  14. by   SOCRATES SOUL
    the mass exodus of nurses also continues here with agency and pool staff making up at least 2 to 3 nurses per ward on any given shift....

    until administrations and governments really pull their funger out it will continue here and worldwide......

    but the all time beauty is that we nurses dont have to stay somewhere we hate, the plethora of jobs out there is amazing, both universal and at home, the freedom of specialty choice is bountiful, the scope of our work borderless and the demands for job placements far outweigh the actual availability of nurses to fill those jobs.......:d .....when will the masses learn that our jobrole cannot be carried out by a robot/technology alone?........

    its seems they are hellbent on taking the nurse out of nursing....