Looking for some input and words of encouragement

[NCmcMan]

Hello all. I would like to introduce myself, and tell you a little bit about me, and hope for some of your feedback. My name is Josh. I'll be 34 in July, and am seriously considering becoming an RN. Unfortunately, I have a HUGE amount of obstacles to navigate through. I have a serious weight problem, as I am over 500 lbs. I have been working for a private security agency for the last 11 years making horrible money. I only recently got my GED 3 years ago.

Because of my situations, I also suffer from depression. Recently, I nearly had a breakdown because off the crossroads I have come to in my life. I decided that it was time for me to find a real career where I can earn decent money, and enjoy what I am doing. I can honestly say that I never up until recently considered being an RN. The idea came to while thinking about a career that has some security in it. Well, after doing lots and lots of research, I feel this would be a good job for me. I really am a very compassionate person. (Maybe too much, really)

While doing my research into getting into the community college's program, I have found that it is one that is of a "competitive" nature. From what I gather, you could literally get a 4.0 and still not be accepted to it. This really scares me because I goofed off the entire time I was in school, and eventually just quit. I have never learned any good study habits, and have a very lazy mind. I was also very discouraged to find out that I would have to probably quit my 3rd shift job as a security guard because of the time conflict.

Apparently, the hours of class would start at 8am in the morning. I don't get off work until 8am in the morning. This made me very anxious, because I don't have rich parents or a trust fund or anything like that. I will basically have to eat rice and noodles, and rent a cheap room from somebody's house while I flip burgers on the weekends to try and keep shelter over my head while I am attending school. This is not a problem for me. I don't mind eating noodles today so I can have steak tomorrow. I am just very nervous about the competition process. If I give up what little I already have, and am not successful in nursing school, this would devastate me. Failure would not be an option.

Not to mention, I probably have to loose about 250 lbs before I can even get into nursing school. Theres no way that I can stand on my feel all day rite now. I have basically started eating small meals now, because I have a goal to shoot for. Instead of going to Wendy's and getting a half dozen burgers, I brought a turkey sandwich on wheat and an apple for lunch. No more Chinese buffets for dinner, instead, salmon and a small russet potato with fruit. I have anxiety disorder, and food usually comforts me, but I can't do it anymore. I am very unhealthy rite now because of my size. I am just really really nervous about failing when I get in because I can't fail!

I am going to be living super poverty stricken in order to pursue this goal. I am hoping while I am in school I can find some people that can teach me to study and learn things. I know nursing school is VERY VERY difficult and there is a lot of information to learn. I often wondered if I have a learning disability. I was diagnosed with ADD when I was a boy. Perhaps, I will go talk to a doctor about getting on something for that. I think I still may have it. It's hard for me to concentrate on reading and what not.

Anyway, I just would like to hear from you folks about anything that may be able to help me. Also, I would really like to try to make some friends on here too. It would be great to have someone to talk to when it comes time to questions about the field. Coincidentally, I don't know any nurses. Anyway, thank you very much for taking the time to read my topic, and I very much look forward to hearing from you. Have a great day.

Josh

[elprup, BSN, RN]

It took me 6 years to get my BSN (chronic health issues, 2 small children, sinle mom). You can do it! One step at a time, like others have said. I am cheering for you. And thanks for helping motivate me.

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

Try to make time for counseling in addition to weight loss. Sometimes the reason for addicted eating is not clear, and sometimes help in putting things in perspective is helpful. Hand in hand can go the distance on being successful.

Wishing you all the luck in the world.

[NCmcMan]

Thank You as well! Your situation helps motivate me! :)

[NCmcMan]

Thank You very much Jadelpn. Your rite about the counseling. I will be getting that soon. Money has been tight, but things are going to work out. I have to do EVERYTHING to make them.

[charlottegirl]

Hi Josh. I went through nursing school in my 30's as a single mom with 3 kids. You CAN do it financially. It's hard, but doable. I worked at the hospital 12 to 16 hour shifts 2-3 days per week as a nurse assistant (needless to say I had a lot of help with my kids...) so I had some income there. I took out all the student loans that I could. Some would disagree with me on this one, but I did what I had to do. Loan money can go to pay housing, books, food etc. There are also grants and scholarships out there. The hospital that I work for paid one of my loans for my school in exchange for two years of full time work.

I agree with previous posters about starting your prereqs online. Courses like psychology, sociology, English comp, medical terminology etc are required for many nursing programs. If you can take these at a community college (do well in these classes!!) it will boost your confidence and help your GPA.

I encourage you to get help with your eating patterns. It sounds like it is more than the weight alone; you mentioned that you self-medicate your depression and anxiety with food. You are not alone in this struggle. Have you checked out food addicts anonymous? They have online and phone meetings and support. Overeaters anonymous is online too.

I wish you the best. Keep us posted.

Charlotte

[Career2_BSN, BSN]

www.sparkpeople.com --- check it out. That's how I lost 25lbs and kept it off. Others on that site have lost 100+. It isn't a diet program, it's a lifestyle change program and you change your life by making small goals, achieving those, then making additional goals and achieving those. A few months into it, you look back and are astonished by how far you've come. They have a sister-site called babyfit for pregnant mothers. I followed Spark until we wanted another baby, then I switched to babyfit. I had formed such wonderful habits on Spark that I only gained 22lbs while pregnant. The doc wanted 25-35, but I still had a bit to lose. My son was 2 weeks early and a very healthy 8lb baby so he had no ill effects from my healthy eating and exercise habits. If anything, he thrived because of them.

The creator of Spark wrote a book called The Spark. I highly recommend that as well. He never had a weight problem, but he had emotional and self-esteem issues. Through exercise and diet (primarily, exercise), he built his confidence and he used that confidence to create this company he now leads. It was never his plan to own his own company, that came about later. He wanted to be able to speak publicly and not pass out or look like a fool. He explains his original motivation and goals and how it affected those around him (something he never expected) and where he went from there. He also cares deeply for people and from your posts here, I imagine you'll find you have a lot in common with him.

Reading The Spark and following the SparkPeople plan has really helped me with my confidence as well. I am 35 and pursuing my RN while helping support a mortgage and family of 5. It scares the *&%$ out of me to leave a decent paying job and go into a completely different field, but I've worked hard in my prereqs and paying off extra bills and changing shopping/cooking habits so we can live on a CNA salary (plus hubby's salary) without making the family suffer too much while I pursue my dream. I start my CNA program in a couple of weeks and plan to work as a CNA while in nursing school. I had already laid out the plans, and they looked good on paper, but I was struggling with the confidence of it all until I read The Spark. I keep it handy so I can read it again if I need another boost.

SparkPeople is another online forum (free) with diet and exercise trackers. But more importantly, it's full of people who are in your shoes, or have been in your shoes. These folks support each other through online chats and challenges. They have trainers who have designed exercises and exercise programs that you can do outside of a gym. They have a recipe site and cookbook that'll help you eat healthier versions of foods you enjoy. All of this information and support is free. You just have to join and start participating.

You seem to be on a good start so far with the changes in diet. I suggest you find supporters so you have help getting back on the wagon when you fall off......because you will fall.....many times. The trick is to get back on. As long as you keep returning to healthy habits, you will succeed ---- both in weightloss but also in school.

[texasmum]

You can do nursing school. It's hard but doable. Please, please lose the weight. I just buried a brother in law last week whose last weight was 528 lbs. They couldn't even embalm him due to his size. I know it is so hard but you will find people who will love to support you in both journeys.

[ashleym91]

I read your post and I read everyones' comments. It seems like everyone is being very supportive and giving you good advice. I read a few times that people are telling you to lose weight and take care of your anxiety and depression before you go to school. Well I disagree. Even if you start school tomorrow you will not be an RN for a few years even if it is a two year program since there are pre reqs and stuff. Well yeah of course being in shape would be ideal for working twelve hour shifts.. but honestly you are not going to be working twelve hour shifts for a few years. I am enrolled in a nursing program and there are people who are over weight that are managing to lose weight. As far as your age goes.. most of the people in my classes are over the age of 40.

My advice is this:

1. Fill out your FAFSA and you might receive financial aid, take out a loan if you qualify/want to. Speak with an advisor about the program and where to get started: classes,etc.

2. If you have ADHD go to your psychiatrist and explain to him/her you were diagnosed as a child and you are going back to college so you need a prescription. [People may think that is a crazy thing to say/do since amphetamines are abused but that is literally exactly what I did. I went to my Dr. and I was honest and straight forward and say listen I have ADHD I am going to school and I need medication. So now I am prescribed to adderal] Also if you are struggling with obesity you can lose that weight while you are taking your prerequisites. Adderal is a major appetite suppressant and you will lose a lot of weight just from taking it. I lost about 40 pounds.

3. Create a schedule for work, working out/exercise, dieting, and schoolwork. The more active you are the less depressed you will be. I have suffered with depression for years and I have gone to therapy, I was on antidepressants, mood stabilizers, I have tried everything. I think even though my depression is a chemical imbalance, the times where my confidence is increased and I feel really accomplished with school work, etc is when it goes away. So if you become more active then that may help with your depression. you mentioned that you were lazy at times and a lot of people mistaken depression for laziness but one of the symptoms for depression is literally losing motivation.

* There are many people in my nursing program who failed out of it who were straight A students in highschool

* There are many people in my nursing program who have perfect grades who barely passed highschool

--------The people who do well are the people who want it & are determined and you seem like you have both--------

YOU HAVE MY SUPPORT AND YOU HAVE EVERYONES SUPPORT ON HERE AS WELL. THIS IS A WONDERFUL WEBSITE WITH GREAT STUDENTS AND NURSES AND THERE ARE TONS OF PEOPLE WHO ARE MORE THAN WILLING TO SHARE STUDY TIPS!

Some of my study tips (these are things that work for my but everyone is different):

#1. Stay 110% organized. Completely as organized as possible

#2. Read/review the material before your professor goes over it in class, that way you can ask questions about things you don't understand, it helps tremendously to keep it in your mind, & your professor should like that too :)

#3. While reading the chapters.. this is very time consuming but I take notes while reading the chapter. For example if i'm reading medical surgical nursing: musculoskelatal disorders I will go through the chapter and PARAPHRASE each paragraph so I will have A.Osteoporosis a)clinical manifestations (list them) b.) DX testing c.) Treatment. * A lot of people i go to school with make the huge mistake of studying the wrong way. . or studying in a way that is not good for them. It is all about trial and error. For me I like to take the book and (even though it takes hours) do notes because if you are paraphrasing you are comprehending it.. if you are writing it you are memorizing it.

#4. Study every day. Yes everyday but no that does not necessarily mean ten hours a day.. what I mean is wake up ten minutes earlier and just read through your notes. Take out your notecards at a red light. If you can't fall asleep read. During commercials review. If you are looking at the material frequently rather than cramming it in your head the week before an exam than it stick in your long term memory.

#5. DO NOT FALL BEHIND

#6. Do any practice questions in the textbook

#7. Show up to class, do your assignments, study, and take your exams= PASSING/Good grade

Sincerely Ashley

ps. Just remember that you are capable of going to nursing school. Yes you have some obstacles that you can work through: weight, financial situation, competitive program, history of not being a great student; but you CAN do this :) I have depression, ADHD, I was a horrible student, ex pot head, and now I get high grades in nursing school!

[NCmcMan]

Thank You all very much for that wonderful advice. Ashley, thank you as well for those study tips. I am studying rite now, and I haven't even enrolled into classes. The good thing is, I have a job working security at night, so that is good for me when it comes to study. Instead of playing video games on my PC, now I can study. Nursing is going to be my ticket out of this hell hole I call life rite now :) Better days are ahead, what other motivation could I possibly need? :)

[NurseFrustrated]

I wish you luck in your endeavors Josh. You sound like a nice guy. Lose the weight and have a goal to work towards. You may have to take out student loans to help with school expenses. Many of us had to. I will tell you that while nursing school was stressful for me, I have found that it was nothing compared to the stress of actually being a hospital nurse. I have been an RN for 8 years now.

While there are rewarding aspects of being a nurse, it can also be a thankless profession. You can read some of the threads on this board that go into detail of the not so pleasant side of nursing. I don't want to discourage you but just keep this in mind. Please do what you can to get any anxiety or depression under control now.

Having a goal is a wonderful thing and I hope that nursing is right for you. I wish you all the best of luck.

[trauma_lama, BSN]

Josh, I don't really have any wisdom to offer. but you sound like a great guy with a plan and commitment, and I truly wish you all the luck in the world- you can do it!!! Keep us informed on your progress. :-)

[uRNmyway, ASN, RN]

Josh, I truly do wish you all the best. I think you sound very motivated, and your life experiences would most likely make you a very caring, empathetic nurse.

HOWEVER...I do think you need to take your own health in hand first. Nursing school is hard for people who are healthy physically and emotionally/mentally. You might not be spending 12 hours on your feet right now, but when you are in clinicals, expect to be up on your feet that whole time, except for your break.

Then there is all the work. You have school to focus on, then there is all the homework and self-study stuff. Not to mention careplans. Don't get me wrong, I worked almost full time while also going to nursing school full time. But it was hard on me. And I was pretty healthy to begin with. I developed sleep issues (could only sleep a few hours a night to be able to get my things done). My weight kept fluctuating pretty drastically. I lost a bunch of weight because of stress and being so broke I couldn't afford groceries. Then I gained it all back when the stress led to eating my emotions.

I think that the most important part of being a nurse is making sure you take care of yourself first. I'm not saying you shouldn't or can't do it. I just think that it would be better for you to take care of your own physical and mental health issues before you jump into the complete chaos that is nursing school.