Can't go with family on vacation. Is it worth it?!

SmilingBluEyes · Dec 11, 2005

It was stuff like this that made me go perdiem.

I am sorry for your disappointment. Seniority will almost ALWAYs win everywhere in the vacation request realm. It does where I work, too, and too many have 15-20 (or more) years in our department, so you know how hard it is to get the time off that you want---- unless no one with a lot of time in the company asks first.

Being perdiem solved that (among other issues) for me. I always take vacations when I want or need to.

But I know, it's not for everyone.

Trauma Columnist · Dec 11, 2005

Linda - I agree. When I was in the military, I knew I was going to be separated from my family. Now, as a nurse, I know that it can happen too. I have worked too many holidays, vacations, etc to even count. This is why I think my suggestions of trying to trade or rearrange your days so that you can fly out even if its only a couple of days would be worthwhile to consider.

SmilingBluEyes · Dec 11, 2005

Being flexible certainly is well worth it. I just have found many will not return a favor when asked.

Trauma Columnist · Dec 11, 2005

Yes, SmilingBlueEyes - I do agree.

allnurses Guide · Dec 11, 2005

Being 48 out of 55 in two years sounds like your place has something going for it to keep people around. I don't think missing out on one vacation is really putting your job ahead of your family, its acknowledging that this one time it couldn't get worked out. Consistently working overtime, never making it to school or sport functions, never being there is putting your job first: family is year round. I would hesitate to hire someone who quit over one failed vacation request. I agree with the others who ask if you can move your shifts around in order to be able to go for a little while.

My unit only lets 2 off at a time, we sign up by seniority but only during a certain window of time, after that its first ask first get. Also limited to 2 weeks no matter how much time you've got saved up, during prime time; if you want longer you take it during less popular times of the year.

Calling in sick and getting a bogus excuse is just plain dishonest. Just because 'loyalty is not rewarded' does not give carte blanche to lie in order to get what you want. I don't mean to be harsh, but personal integrity is very important to me. Signing up by seniority is how longevity is rewarded! When you take the job you are agreeing to play by the rules.

Zee_RN, BSN, RN · Dec 12, 2005

It's not as simple as "missing one vacation," at least to me. My daughters (triplets) are 16 years old. I've got maybe one more vacation with them, after this one? It's also a lot of money to spend and not be able to go as a family. And it did have to be scheduled now; otherwise--obviously--I would have waited until it was my turn to pick.

And I have been*very* flexible with my schedule; I help to accommodate others' needs and the unit needs and I haven't called off for almost two years now. Seniority should be worth something but I think that should be worth something too.

Does your unit schedule you to work "your weekend" during your vacation? Mine does. It's up to you to find someone to cover for you while you're on vacation. Your scheduled weekend is cast in stone; you are scheduled to work it regardless of vacation times or special requests. I've got another weekend in January that every year I spend with my mother at a scrapbook weekend; this year, I'm scheduled to work it. And since the schedule for that week isn't out yet, I can't work out a switch yet. So that's another event potentially screwed up--since you can't "request" a day on "your" weekend.

Even if I do talk to those who have scheduled for "my" week, I've still got 30+ people above me; there's no guarantee that someone else won't take that week.

And the week before Christmas for me? MON 7a-7p; TUE 11p-7a; THU 7a-7p; FRI 11p-7a. That's switching between days and nights TWICE in five days. One day "off" in between (and that's not really a day off; I'd normally be sleeping but I can't because I have to go to work the next morning). That's just not right and it's part of why I'm so frustrated about vacation too. I'm just really really frustrated (as you can tell) about their inflexibility regarding scheduling--only the employees are supposed to be flexible, not the employer.

Sorry for the long rant but there's a number of things piling up right now.

Cyberkat, it has been a long time. Thanks for the welcome back. :)

allnurses Guide · Dec 12, 2005

Hi Zee . . . :)

Well, after reading your post above, I have to say that your job is very difficult and I completely understand your frustration.

I do think Bipley had some good points to make too.

But if I were you, I would not be working where you are working.

In fact, like Deb, I decided just to work part-time. I quit the rat race and I'm never going back.

Best wishes and I think you should go on your vacation.

steph

FNimuaeMae · Dec 12, 2005

No job is worth missing time off enjoying time with your family. I'm constantly getting crap from my fiance because I have to work on weekends when there are family functions with his family. No one in his family works in the healthcare field. We have a running joke that all the family functions are scheduled for when I am working because thats how it has worked out alot of the time in recent months.

When I was in nursing school, I worked 3-11 every friday, saturday, sunday and monday. Occasionally I would pull a double on some nites.

Fresh out of nursing school I did 3- 8 hour shifts at a hospital and alternating weekends Baylors shifts at a nursing home til I was able to get 4-9 hour shifts that counted as full time at the hospital. But I wanted 3-12's all along.

I move to a new state to be with my fiance, I worked days for a year doing 3-12's, and the weekends never worked out. I'm doing 3-12's now on nite shift, and its been better, but he complains about us being 2 ships passing in the night on those nights I am heading to work and he is coming home from his business type job.

I long for the day when I have the wedding done with, finances in order and can justify cutting down to 2-12's a week.... or per diem when we decide to have kids. That would be nice!

Go on that vacation, your family is worth it! There are tons of jobs out there that are more flexible with vacation time.

Missy:rolleyes:

Stephanie in FL · Dec 12, 2005

I would be upset in this circumstance also.

But many things could change before this vacation time comes around. Who knows if the nurses who have this week off will even be working at your hospital at that time. Who knows if anyone in your family will be ill and unable to go on the trip ( I hope not!). Circumstances can change.

Yes, you do have options-getting another job or changing to per-diem or PT.

I agree with the poster who said she wouldn't lie and call in sick and then lie to a MD to get a note.

Stephanie RN

BittyBabyGrower, MSN, RN · Dec 12, 2005

We have a constant struggle with vacations in our unit also, but with close to 100 nurses and only 3 prime months of summer holiday, how would you work that out? Not everyone gets a full week in the summer where I work. We are allotted 160hours a week for vacation, so that is 5 people. We can take 2 weeks in the summer, not all of us with seniority do, but a lot have, and hey, I can't blame them. We also have the option of taking hours instead of a full week, so many people will back up days. We are sometimes required to work an extra weekend in the summer to let people out on vacation. But, we are also forced into picking up 12 hours a month so that we can get these people out on vacation...which I totally do NOT agree with. I have enough seniority to get what I want, and if I wanted the extra time I 'd do it.

Sorry about your vacation, but I hate to say that many places are going to be the same...senority usually rules for time off. And I wouldn't get a doc's note..esp if they know you want that week off. I guess you have to make the decision...work or a week off. Can you back up your days, or are you 5 days a week? Maybe you could go for part of the time. Just a thought.

mydesygn · Dec 12, 2005

Zee,
I do not believe any job should come before your family. To be at a job for 2 yrs and not be able to take time off when you want to is insane. I worked for a hospital that forbid employees to take time off if they had no PTO.....I explained to my manager that I was not concerned if I would not be paid for my Vacation, but I would be taking my 2 wks off (which had been booked for 6 months). I was then told that I would be considered "sick" and I would need a Doctors Excuse before returning back to work. Whatever!!!!!!!!! :angryfire :angryfire :angryfire
After enjoying a 2 wk cruise around the caribbean (sp?) which was so needed, I went back to work (with my Dr's excuse), and turned in my notice (2 wks). My manager could not understand why I was so upset......after excepting my resignation she called me at home the next day to cancel me for my shifts for the weekend saying "census is down, we will not be needing you". this happened for the following weekend also, so needless to say I felt I was being "punished" for standing up for myself.
In this day and age, I feel that whomever you work for you are just an Employee number, and as long as you come into work, do not call off sick, do not complain, do not have an opinion, and do not have a life they (management) leave you alone. Remember, there are always jobs out there, and you only have one family, and one life to make happy memories (sp?).
Go on vacation with your family.
Sorry, just my opinion,
Jayne

Hate to have to say this but I'm pretty sure your manager is glad to see you go. It's so sad that the "me" generation has no appreciation for the value of work. I'm pretty sure you were so wrapped up in your own needs that you did not realize that if everyone could take off anytime they wanted to without any notice, that there would be little or no staff to care for the patients (that's the reason for the PTO restrictions). Why are you so special that your vaction is more important that the staff who responsibly saved their PTO, submitted their vacation request and worked with their management team to help find a balance between personal needs and the needs of the unit. Why is your family so important that the nurses who sacrificed to be their for their families now have to work because you want to take a spur of the moment vacation beacause you need some "me" time. Sorry my opinion is not politcally correct but I'm tired of the rest of the unit suffering because of a few selfish, entitled nurses.

SmilingBluEyes · Dec 12, 2005

I agree with those saying faking illness is out of line. Be HONEST IN ALL YOU DO---be upfront about your needs, not passive-aggressive. BE adult enough to decide IF the job is worth the strife you feel,and if not, then be woman/man enough to make the decision to MOVE ON and seek other employment.

But do not screw coworkers and managers with fake, ill-conceived excuses. Remember, you are not the only one who has needs here. Someone will have to cover for you if you fake it...how is that making the situation right? It's not--- That is no way to handle it; it IS immature and passive-aggressive. It's up to you to get what you need, honestly and with integrity.