Frustrated with the image of nursing

[Missa]

I'm getting really tired of the lack of respect I receive as a nurse. I would like to tell you about a recent example of something that infuriated me. I attended a Fantasia party (a home party for "sensual" items) at a friend's house a couple of nights ago. At one point, I left the room to use the washroom. Upon my return, the salesperson was showing off a "naughty nurse" outfit. The other guests of the party all enthusiastically agreed that I needed to buy that one. I like to think that I'm a pretty fun, open minded, easy going person, but this ticked me off! :angryfire I replied that I had no interest in such an outfit and as a professional nurse, I found it to be offensive. The conversation ended abruptly and the salesperson moved on to the "sexy maid" outfit. :icon_roll I think part of the reason that this upset me so much was that all of the other guests (including my friend who was the host) were female lawyers (traditionally a male profession). I have always got the feeling that my lawyer friend does not respect what I do. I get the impression that to her a nurse is someone who couldn't cut it in med school. Honestly, I haven't got all of my feelings on this subject worked out in my mind yet, but I do know that I have dedicated years of my life to getting where I am today. I completed a 3 year diploma nursing program 8 years ago. I did a 4 month critical care certificate program 5 years ago and most recently, I completed my BScN (I graduate tomorrow!). I have worked in a neuro/trauma ICU for 5 years. It is challenging work and I love it. Not just anyone can do it....I'm quite certain that my lawyer friend could not. I just want to scream that nurses are intelligent and play a huge part in our health care system. We are not hand maidens of the doctors and most importantly we're not doctor wannabes! Nursing and medicine are different professions and should be equally respected. I chose to be a nurse not because I couldn't get into med school, but because it was the right profession for me!!! However, I'm getting so frustrated with being looked down upon by society that I'm considering leaving the profession for one that garners more respect. This makes me very sad. Does anyone else feel this way?

[not now, RN]

If a nurse chooses to wear a "naughty nurse" uniform in the bedroom to please her signifigant other/spose who the heck cares? It's their bedroom, thier business. My boyfriend wants me to find a naughty maid outfit, should I tell him no because I worry about the image it projects about maids?

If you're really that offened by what others do in thier own bedroom then don't go to a "pleasure party." Simple as that. Some aren't offended. Heck I went to the opening of a Hustler store a couple of years ago, hugged a half dressed hostess and waved at Larry Flint. It didn't phase me.

Lord knows how many times I've heard some variation of "Can you give me a sponge bath?" by guys who find out I'm a nurse. They were flirting, over the top flirting but some men have no tact. When I was single I would say something to the effect of "You're not good enough for my skills" and walk away (making sure to take the drink they just bought for me along! ). I didn't get huffy or offended. I'm nearly impossible to offened. Most of the time they aren't worth my energy.

The objectification of the opposite sex can also be extended to women. Are you gonna deny the sexy cop/plumber/pool boy/doctor/fireman idea? (Really, how many hot plumbers have you seen? But the image is out there)

How many times have I seen women perk up at the thought of a fireman? Plenty. How many fireman/policeman calenders are out there? I have a lot of firefighter friends, one summer they did carwashes to raise money for the burn unit. Do you know how many "You can put out my fire anyday..." comments they recieved? I know women that want me to introduce them to my Hotshot firends because there's a saying that "A fat guy can't be a Hotshot."

And before anyone makes any assumptions about me: I am not one of those girls who flash others. I don't wear shorts in public unless it's to the gym. I only wear skirts if they are knee length or longer. I don't show my midriff, cleavage or butt crack. I don't even wear thin strapped tank tops. I rarely wear make-up. Maybe because I'm young I think this way...who knows.

[ortess1971]

Aside from the sexism issue, I've encountered a definite snobbery towards nurses. I'm now in an accelerated BSN program, with a previous B.A. in English, and many of my friends and colleagues were horrified when I told them I was going to pursue nursing as a career. Almost all of them regarded nurses as half-wits, or at the very least, people with no interest in intellectual or cultural pursuits. I find myself continually defending my decision to go back to school for nursing; it is so frustrating. I cannot understand where this attitude comes from...In fact, during my first degree, I was always in awe of all the rigorous science prereqs nursing students had to take-- the workload seemed so intense and difficult.

Any thoughts on how we can change this perception?

I have had the exact same experience and I think a big contributor is the perception of nurses as "saintly" angelic women.(and men!) Don't get me wrong, compassion is a huge part of what we do but it's not all of it. Many people don't realize the scientific knowledge involved in nursing. This sounds really nitpicky but I decided recently not to buy or wear any nursing stuff that does the whole nurse/angel thing. I'm NOT an angel-simply an intelligent professional who cares for her patients yet wants adequate respect and compensation for what she does. Think about it, angels don't demand respect or a decent wage.....

[Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN]

The objectification of the opposite sex can also be extended to women. Are you gonna deny the sexy cop/plumber/pool boy/doctor/fireman idea? (Really, how many hot plumbers have you seen? But the image is out there)

How many times have I seen women perk up at the thought of a fireman? Plenty. How many fireman/policeman calenders are out there? I have a lot of firefighter friends, one summer they did carwashes to raise money for the burn unit. Do you know how many "You can put out my fire anyday..." comments they recieved? I know women that want me to introduce them to my Hotshot firends because there's a saying that "A fat guy can't be a Hotshot."

No one HAS denied anything, and the OP never said they were offended at what people do in their own bedroom, so that's even beside the point.

The obectification of the opposite sex? It's exists, i'm aware of that, however, last i checked, the local PD and FD employed women as well.

[PANurseRN1]

I know that question wasn't directed at me, but I wanted to add my .02

While I would be blushing the entire time at a party like that (or breaking out the juvenile humor), I don't think there is anything wrong with shopping for stuff that makes things more interesting in the bedroom- it doesn't objectify women.

I'm not sure if I could wear constumes- I think that's role playing, but I think it hit a nerve for her to see "yet another stereotype of the nurse being a bimbo half-wit that does patients and doctors in her spare time."

Just my two cents.

Then which profession would it be OK to objectify?

[PANurseRN1]

I think the psychology of it is that human beings have always associated certain feelings with every profession's "uniforms". Just take a moment and think about what you see in your mind's eye if I say: cowgirl, soldier, priest, cheerleader, pimp, farmer, barmaid, cop, shiek...etc.

We each expect certain attributes to go with the classification, whether they actually do or not.

Someone, somewhere, has had a fantasy about a sexual experience with all of these (perhaps one at a time!) and a recurring theme that sex toy manufacturer's and marketer's have picked up on is to do with nurses. After all, we DO often give the most intimate care one can imagine and are taught to be non-judgmental and nurturing. We are not supposed to be coldly clinical, but rather provide the human touch in distressing circumstances.

In our nursing schools, we are told that when we put on our uniforms, we are accepting all the history that goes with it. It is our professional personna. We willingly accept the respect and prestige of the designation, and must uphold the implied higher standards of morality, education and responsiveness. The "bad" connotations follow the "good" in this instance. We can't go back to admitting only "plain women of impeccable virtue" can we?

Additionally, here we are again, women putting down other women as lacking self-respect if they choose to utilize their assets of youth and beauty in any other than the proscribed way! Who is to say they aren't working their way through nursing school on the money they make? YOUR way isn't the only path in life, except for YOU.

Oh, please. You can't be serious!

[buddiage]

No one HAS denied anything, and the OP never said they were offended at what people do in their own bedroom, so that's even beside the point.

The obectification of the opposite sex? It's exists, i'm aware of that, however, last i checked, the local PD and FD employed women as well.

Totally- this post isn't about what goes on in the bedroom, although it has drifted that way. Nobody cares about role playing, so why is this conversation going that way? Nobody cares. This thing kinda went the direction of objectifying women.

I married a fireman... and the *butt kissing* that accompanys the fireman thing makes me want to gag. To think I was 19-20 years old and would go gah-gah over firemen or police officers. *oh brother*

Yeah, well try living with a fireman- I've been married 12 and together for 13. Trust me, it's enough to put out your fire.

It's amazing what a few years will do to someone's introspection. As far as attending a Hustler store opening, that' your deal, but I think I would've given a "special" wave to Larry Flynt. You're free to do what you want, but he's one of the worst offenders as far as I can see.

[Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN]

he's one of the worst offenders as far as I can see.

I remember when Howie Mandell had a talk show, and featured Larry Flynt as a guest, HM ask LF about the child Media scandal. LF's answer was "Well i'm not selling such, because i just don't think there's a market for it." Never did make a mention about it being wrong, but the rest of his answer was market-related too. Frightening.

[Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN]

And i won't wear the angel prints, either, but if i wore my own home laundered scrubs, they'd be the solid colors, anyway,

[Medic2RN, BSN, RN, EMT-P]

How many times have I seen women perk up at the thought of a fireman? Plenty. How many fireman/policeman calenders are out there? I have a lot of firefighter friends, one summer they did carwashes to raise money for the burn unit. Do you know how many "You can put out my fire anyday..." comments they recieved?

I've been a firefighter for a little over 8 years now and I've heard the same type of comments, some of them I would never repeat.

It's objectification of both sexes with regard to the fire department and also the police dept! Oh - and I'm a female BTW

No one is safe!:sofahider

[buddiage]

I remember when Howie Mandell had a talk show, and featured Larry Flynt as a guest, HM ask LF about the child Media scandal. LF's answer was "Well i'm not selling such, because i just don't think there's a market for it." Never did make a mention about it being wrong, but the rest of his answer was market-related too. Frightening.

Yeah, that's wrong- no matter what "path" you are on. He clearly represents the rationale behind my opinion: hurting others for a dollar is wrong, no matter what kind of lame "freedom of speech" tag you try to sell it with. Money does not pay off a loss of dignity or humiliation.

[not now, RN]

No one HAS denied anything, and the OP never said they were offended at what people do in their own bedroom, so that's even beside the point.

Dressing up as nurses/role playing is what other people do in the bedroom. And if everyone is aware of this and states that they are fine with what occurs in one's bedroom they why all the fuss about what's avaliable? Do you really expect the sale and distribution of "naughty nurses" outfits to end completely? Is that your goal? You could educate the world on the importance of nursing and the critical role we play in the healthcare system and there will still be some guy who want a "naughty nurse."

Or was it because everyone thought the nurse should wear the naughty nurse outfit? Wasn't she the only nurse in a room full of lawers? Maybe they were trying to include her and it was a bad joke? Why get so huffy about it? My boyfriends friends (and my boyfriend) are all white, I'm mexican. Do you know how many times we've gone to his friends house and they've made mexican food (and offered me Corona) to make me more comforatble? Almost everytime. Do you know how many times I've been offended? Zero. Where there is one "other" people try to make them comforable and it doesn't always work.

Unless someone is blantantly making a scene about your profession don't take the defense.

The obectification of the opposite sex? It's exists, i'm aware of that, however, last i checked, the local PD and FD employed women as well.

And male nurses run rampant where I work. This is no longer a pink collar job. What's the point?

Males seem to be more comfortable in thier role as a sex object. They don't take anything seriously and are aware of the what images women may have of them and don't really care. They aren't as offended as women are. Why is that?

[chadash]

Or try this: My sister considered being a lawyer, but she decided to go directly into a life of crime,,,,