After completing school and subsequent licensure I found work very quickly. I was enthusiastic, but after having a preceptor [I gave the benefit of the doubt] who was never around, left me on my own without supervision, and always gave me rationales: "Thats just the way it's always been done" for 6 weeks I was very frustrated. I followed the exact protocol the hospital has in place to get a new preceptor. About this time I was starting to realize that being in the ER might be over my head as a new grad. BUT as usual I give everything, myself include, the benefit of the doubt. I always try to give 100% and never complain. After 4 more weeks I KNEW I was over my head in the ER. Once again, I followed the hospital protocol, notified my supervisor this and was told he would find me a place on one of the Med/Surg floors. Little did I know what this person was up to. I guess by giving my all, giving things the benefit of the doubt, trying to follow protocols and believing in what people tell you...was the wrong thing. Vindictive? I dunno...but basically left out in the cold without a schedule and waiting for return phone calls.
So here's the kicker to all this. It was all a lie! Oh, no one told me it was...but after having to follow up with a transfer request to two floors and being subsequently told 'We'll give you a call.' I am left out in the cold! No schedule with anyone. Why is it you can do everything right, but be punished for it? Why is dishonesty the best policy? Why do people have to try to control you? All this hoopla about wanting to keep you, all this hoopla about caring, help forge your career etc. is bogus! I am very disillusioned and to the point of throwing in the towel.
I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG! I was open, honest, have integrity, cared, etc. and I am being punished for what? Is it bad judgement? Its obvious that even there is a lie about a nursing shortage in this area. All I want to do is become a good nurse. Just like everyone expects honesty, integrity and respect I would ask the same thing in return. But I guess it isn't a two way street.
I'm not in high school. I'm not a little kid! I spent 22 years in the Marines. Treat me as an adult and with at least some respect! Everyone else asks for the same...why not me? I am not a pig going to slaughter!!! It is that simple. So now I find myself realizing that all of the last few years may have been a waste...which I hope not! All I want is a chance. If that is the way this hospital will treat I don't want any part of them....ARGGH, but owe scholarship
loan to. So I went to a new facility, turned in an app and subsequently hired tentatively based upon references! I was honest and told them I worked at this specific hospital. I could have lied, but why? I hope and pray that the talk with soon to be former boss goes well. If NOT I am still left in the cold. I am hoping to be hired on a Med/Surg floor to get a good nursing base. I will be behind on my bills....for what? For doing what is right? For following protocols? Becoming a nurse should NOT, I repeat NOT be this hard. It should not be all OJT, making mistakes [hopefully not a terminal one], etc. One of the worst things in all of this and I see it all the time...is everyone wants and says for you to be honest and have integrity...but some in the profession's actions are just the opposite! The way people are treated you are being taught to lie over and over again.
And everyone wants you to use critical thinking?! And then they want you to 'ask' every single little thing?! "Shoulda asked. Shoulda asked." Where's critical thinking if you have to ask about everything? Its tough enuff already to learn about Docs, meds, charting, becoming a nurse and time management....whew! I was instructed on more than one occasion on where IM injections go. I passed Med Pass with flying colors. So why oh why when I gave a 1cc IM in the deltoid that WAS NOT B-12 or Tetanus was I asked why I put it there? I gave the rationale, showed placedment, even showed in a book and was subsequently told I was wrong. ALL IM injections other than above go in the 'rump.' Why? You didn't ask!
Sorry...as you can tell I wandered and am very frustrated to say the least. I NOW can see why there might be a nursing shortage. I can understand to some degree all the issues others here on this forum have gone through. All I ask is for someone to give me a chance. Teach me, mold me, be honest with me, treat me with dignity...and darnit! I will do my best to ask!
Sep 30, '06
I totally agree, I am almost 2 months into my orientation, and my critical thinking and problem solving is developing through each day. It's a tough transition from nursing school to the start of the actual work setting.
Last edit by amy0123 on Sep 30, '06