Finally understand the Facebook no-no's

Nurses Relations

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I've been having a lot of problems with a co-worker lately, and when she requested to be my FB friend, I thought about it long and hard before I accepted. I'm a nice person, and I give people the benefit of the doubt the majority of the time. She had been a lil nicer to me, so I thought this might be her way of mending bridges.

Wrong.

I have a nasty cold. One of those ones that settles into your chest and hangs on for days. Two days ago, I slept all day, then attempted to keep my dinner plans I had made a week or so ago. I would've canceled but its for a younger girl that I mentor. I went to dinner, and I was miserable. Could barely breathe, and I was exhausted when I arrived home. Up until that point, I had been feeling ok and I was going to try working, but once I got home, I knew I couldn't manage a 10 hour shift. I called in. I posted a status about needing lots of breathing tx's and sleep, and I thanked the young girl for putting up with my miserably sick self while at dinner.

I received a call from my nursing supervisor the next morning. Basically, my co-worker knew I called out, and she saw this status. This status had nothing to do with work, and in my opinion, isn't even incriminating. She "misread" it and told my supervisor that I went out to dinner after I had called in. I had to explain to my supervisor that I had attempted to go out to dinner before I called in, but was so sick I left early. She was still angry and told me that "it didn't look good" and asked why I even went out to dinner. So, I explained that the plans had been made for a week, and it was with a younger girl I mentor. Its been a rough week between me getting sick and my gramma being in the hospital. I was just trying to fit promised time in with the girl. That seemed to shut her up a bit.

After that, I immediately deleted the co-worker. I never post anything about work, or closely related to work on my FB as I know what can happen. I have learned my lesson. Work and FB do NOT mix.

Specializes in School LVN, Peds HH.

Facebook is great to catch up... and thats why I use it. Yes, it was dumb, very very dumb, of me to accept the co-workers request. My bad. My mistake. You live and learn.

But to those people saying that because I had the energy to push some buttons on my phone (yes, I have a smartphone, and while laying in bed I might add), that I was well enough to go work a 10 hour shift.... you are very mistaken. Posting a status on FB does not mean I'm able to run around like a mad woman and do my work.

I post so my friends and family are updated on my life. Not to mention, mentoring kids is a huge part of my life, and thats probably the main reason I actually FB. Recognizing and validating them is something I do on a daily basis.

If FB is sucking up all your time, and actually affecting your daily life and work, then get rid of it. If you're like me and post and walk away, or just like to connect to people, keep it. Just be extra careful.

Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

I am friends with several coworkers, but I have defriended/ignored more than a few because they gave me the wrong vibes.

Everything else is set to private - if you want to see my status update, you have to be my friend.

Specializes in School LVN, Peds HH.

Everything else is set to private - if you want to see my status update, you have to be my friend.

Ditto... to see ANYTHING on mine, you have to be a friend. I check my privacy settings weekly to make sure that nothing has changed.

Yes that FB is just one more way of getting your nose into a place where it does not belong. As for the nursing supervisor asking why you were out to dinner and then calling in sick. You should have just said,"I do not ask you about nor do I care about YOUR personal life. You best not be asking about mine." It works every time.

Specializes in Pediatrics.
But to those people saying that because I had the energy to push some buttons on my phone (yes, I have a smartphone, and while laying in bed I might add), that I was well enough to go work a 10 hour shift.... you are very mistaken. Posting a status on FB does not mean I'm able to run around like a mad woman and do my work.

I couldn't agree with you more! You just beat me to.

Regarding what your boss saw (or heard), it's all heresay. It would be the same thing as a coworker saying "hey, I saw raekaylvn in the mall shopping last night, wasn't she supposed to be working? We in nursing feel this need to succumb to managements pressures of explaining ourselves (like faking the cough while calling in sick). If my kid is sick and I need to take the day off, am I not able to do anything for myself that day? What if my husband came home in the evening then I went out? Which of course, brings up the debate of 'can we use sick days when we are not sick'? I know some institutions no longer distinguish between sick days, personal days and floating holidays, and are lumped into PTO (Paid time off).

Specializes in Cardiology, Research, Family Practice.

Any time a person broadcasts details of personal life, that person subjects him/herself to both positive and negative attention. Why broadcast the minutia of your life? Instead of posting for the world to know that you had dinner with a young friend/mentee, why not just send her a personal message directly?

Bottom line, anything you post on the web is open to the world to do with it what they choose.

Specializes in pediatrics, public health.
Bottom line, anything you post on the web is open to the world to do with it what they choose.

Yes, and I think everyone who posts here should keep in mind that this is even more true of allnurses.com than it is of Facebook!

At least on Facebook, you have some control over who reads your posts -- and if you're careful about who your FB "friends" are, and use the most restrictive privacy settings, you have at least a chance of keeping what you post from being broadcast to a wider audience (though I still think it makes sense to be very cautious).

On allnurses, literally anyone on planet Earth who has access to a computer or a smart phone can read what you post here. And even if you're careful to try and stay anonymous, i.e. you don't include your real name in your userid, and don't name the specific place where you work; if you're here posting about your hard day at work or a particularly difficult patient, there's still a decent chance that a co-worker or the patient's family may read what you posted and recognize themselves, and so figure out which userid is yours. Personally, I worry far more about getting in trouble in this way than through anything I post on Facebook! I'm pretty sure I haven't posted anything here that I would have a problem with anyone in the world reading -- I sure hope so anyway!

I think it would be wise for people to be at least as careful about what you post at allnurses as you are about posting on FB.

Oh, and to those who think if you're healthy enough to post to FB, you're healthy enough to go to work -- I want to work where you work!!! :lol2:

Specializes in geriatrics.

I used to avoid facebook, but I recently opened an account to stay in contact with friends, because we are all spread out. However, my facebook is friends only...no acquaintances, coworkers, or anything about work. If you use fb wisely, it can be a useful tool. People who I am not friends with can send an email. I never did see the value in having "200 close friends".

My work "friends" on FB don't have access to my wall. And I am very picky about who I friend. I do not go to work to make friends. I go there to work, period.

Specializes in Step Down.

I agree that it could be a great way to connect with family and friends, but I guess since I'll be looking for work soon, I don't want any extra information floating around about me outside of my resume. :dncgbby:

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
agree! your co-workers are stuck working short due to the whole in the schedule your calling in created while you are obviously well enough to be posting on and reading facebook. i don't blame the co-worker or nm for asking you about this.

i can understand the part about trying to go to dinner because the plans were made a week in advance. and i can understand feeling too sick afterward to go to work. what i cannot understand is why, when you felt too sick to go to work, you felt well enough -- and compelled to -- update your "status" on facebook. you knew you had "friended" co-workers, and from your post you knew that this one co-worker might not be trustworthy. so why even go there?

as the co-worker of a nurse who went out after work to celebrate her 30th birthday, called in sick the next morning, and then spent the rest of the day posting photos of her drunken self celebrating her birthday the night before, i can see where your co-workers might not think the best of you right now. we all got stuck picking up the slack that day because bebe was "horribly ill -- too ill to come to work" ten minutes before the shift started. as a consequence, most of us who may have been inclined to let some of her less than stellar work habits go because she was so cute and so friendly, are no longer willing to pick up her slack. that's a helluva price to pay for stupidity.

Specializes in PERI OPERATIVE.

Good grief. I could be sick with the flu and have a temp of 101 and I could still post on FB. I wouldn't go to work and spread it all around to my coworkers.

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