Fairness

Mavrick, BSN, RN · Jan 20, 2018

It was me exercising my right to free range fecal production

Hey, where's my "like".

https://allnurses.com/general-nursing-discussion/are-you-discerning-1145608.html

dportal2006, ASN, RN · Jan 21, 2018

Maybe get a nanny that can pick up the kids after school on those specific days and take care of the. for a few hour? In this economy there are always people looking to supplement their salaries with outside gigs. You should be able to find someone to help you.

Cat365 · Jan 22, 2018

I suppose it depends on what the original agreement with her schedule was. If it was made clear at hiring and they agreed shame on them. The facilities short staffing is not her problem. If she was told her schedule would rotate and she can't accommodate it now, shame on her. Other people have lives too (and the fact she has children shouldn't allow her special treatment over other employees)

If it's not working for her and the facility she needs to look for another job irregardless of fault.

guest940422 · Feb 1, 2018

Ok so I'll admit I didn't read all 50 comments, so I'm not really sure where we are in the debate. But consider a few points.

1) Empathise with your manager: you are one of dozens of nurses they schedule. They do not make the schedule with the sole purpose of making your life hard. But there is no such thing as a schedule that makes everyone happy. They get about 20 pissed off emails from people who didn't get what they wanted every day the schedule drops.

2)Not everyone has kids: I've been an RN working 12 hour shifts for 11 years,.... while I sympathise with people who have families, I'm also jealous of them. Since I don't have kids I have never had a christmas off. You're complaining about a problem many people around you wish they had, and are a bit tired of having to help others with getting nothing in return.

3)You're not the only mom in the hospital: Hundreds of parents figure out how to get their kids to school and themselves to work without requiring their boss to accommodate them. They team up with coworkers and trade shifts, they work opposite of their spouses, they pay a neighbor to put their kids on the bus, they get a job in one of the many nursing specialties that accommodate their schedule (nursing is crazy flexible)

4) When all else fails work weekends: you may be giving up family time, but you get your hours in and your kids get to school, hell the money you can save on daycare could probably let you work part time. Then you'd have time to be class mom, making up for the lost time on the weekend.

5)You signed up for it: unless you had a contract when you got hired, you signed up for shift work, your boss isn't being unprofessional, you are. If you can't work your scheduled shifts, it's your responsibility to get them covered. If you have a husband and a family you have it better than most. Get on care.com and pay someone to help you with morning care, for $10 or 15 an hour most college kids will come to your house before class and help get your kids dressed and take them to school. If that isn't an option look into FMLA so you don't get penalized for being late. (the last option should be a last ditch effort as your coworkers will hate you)

6) Why can't your kids put themselves on the bus?: My mom was a single mom and a nurse. She left for work before I woke up and got home right before bedtime. In first grade I had an alarm clock, woke up at 6 am, took a shower, ate breakfast, put on the clothes she laid out for me the night before, and walked out to the bus stop myself at 730 to get on the bus to school. If I missed the bus, I spent the day waiting for my mom to come home and chew me out. Say what you want about latch key kids, but I only had to do this 2 or 3 days a week. I was an RN at 21, my parents never had to make sure my homework was done, I was doing my own taxes at 15 years old, and I'm not a "boomerang" kid who kept moving back in and out of my parents home like everyone I went to high school with. You would be amazed at what your kids are capable of doing if they have to.

guest940422 · Feb 1, 2018

and this is why retention is low. Ms. DNP, i guess youll need to know what size scrubs to wear, cause youll be working when you have no staff.... if you keep treating us nurses like this.

If you keep talking to DNPs like that, you'll be crying on your way to HR for your last check while you consider returning to community college to be a court reporter.

Someone gets to that level in our field, shut up and listen to what they have to say. They have earned it, and you might learn something.

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Feb 1, 2018

I do need to clarify: I don't think being flexible is impossible. But I have a unit full of people with varying needs, from young parents whose kids get sick, to the ones who are caring for both kids and aging, ailing parents, to those who chose never to be parents.
A nurse manager can't screw over the ones who don't have little kids in favor of those that do. There IS flexibility in that people can switch shifts, cover each other ----whatever is needed.
In the years mine were little, my husband and I worked opposite shifts so the kids always had someone home. And he was military so he deployed. But I worked PRN and when he was deployed, I didn't work. I did not make much money but enough to keep us going. It was a struggle I understand so well.
But EVERYONE has an important life outside work. I guarantee you, ALL the nurses/techs/ancillary personnel working in our unit have "certain special needs". We just can't schedule all around them or there would be no one there when the patients need them.
I am not so removed from direct care, just one sick call from an RN puts me on the floor, and my work gets behind. So you see, I have to be flexible for my staff. If I can be flexible, so can the staff, is how I see it. Trust me, scheduling is hard for any manager and being "fair" has to include EVERYONE regardless of their personal family situation. Kids will always need you when grown, even. There is no end once you decide to parent. For me, it's two grandkids now, to consider, which is partly why I took my current position.
Been a nurse nearly 21 years. Never asked anyone to do me favors to enable me to meet my personal needs. Anyone choosing to be a nurse should consider that in most cases, the units staff 24/7/365 and yep, "someone" has to be there at all those times. I do become surprised, still, when people enter nursing and then realize they have to work some crappy shifts/days and raise heck about it. To me, they should have known what they got into.

People just don't all automatically know the harsh reality of staffing before they enter Nursing. I didn't.

The schools/recruiters should make sure this is known by applicants before anyone is admitted to a school of Nursing.

You sound awfully bitter, SBE. I'm sorry you've had such a miserable time.

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Feb 1, 2018

Maybe get a nanny that can pick up the kids after school on those specific days and take care of the. for a few hour? In this economy there are always people looking to supplement their salaries with outside gigs. You should be able to find someone to help you.

Her problem is getting them to school in the morning.

even so, your idea might work for that need.

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Feb 1, 2018

Haven't heard from OP since post #7. Guess this isn't her kind of crowd. Another poop and run. Didn't want to hear it's not about nursing inflexibility, it's her unreasonable demands.
Speaking of which, did they ever identify that jogger that was getting caught on security cams repeatedly pooping in people's yards and running off?

I would like to hear from OP, too. But you should not assume her absence is due to being told she's at fault, inflexible, unreasonable, etc.

allnurses Guide · Feb 1, 2018

and this is why retention is low. Ms. DNP, i guess youll need to know what size scrubs to wear, cause youll be working when you have no staff.... if you keep treating us nurses like this.

It's always funny to me that people react so strongly to constructive criticism. You asked for opinions and you got them. Suck it up. Put on your Big Girl panties and do what you have to do. Go over your scheduler's head or look for another job. I have a child and a family and I paid extra for childcare for when my husband or I could not drop off or pick up our son. We didn't expect to be treated any differently than anyone else.

Hppy

RNNPICU, BSN, RN · Feb 1, 2018

I would like to hear from OP, too. But you should not assume her absence is due to being told she's at fault, inflexible, unreasonable, etc.

I think people are guessing the OPs absence is due to her not liking the response is that the OP has only made 3 posts and has not been on since she made the original post.

allnurses Guide · Feb 1, 2018

When the OP states that her husband and family cannot help her, I wonder why childcare has to be her problem alone rather than a family problem?

My husband used to say that it was me who wanted to have a child so it was up to me to take care of him (Like he was a puppy or something) . once I started working and my husband began to enjoy the extra money I brought in he became more willing to help out. Realistically he leaves the house at 4:30 in the am to work I leave at about 6:10 take my son to school then drive back to work. Of course he's 16 now. When he was little the school that he went to had before and after school care. I dropped him off in the am they fed him breakfast then after school they provided a snack and homework help. all for $5.00 a day. Now when my husband has RDO (Regular day off) he takes care of getting the man cub to school and back home.

Hppy

guest940422 · Feb 1, 2018

People just don't all automatically know the harsh reality of staffing before they enter Nursing. I didn't.
The schools/recruiters should make sure this is known by applicants before anyone is admitted to a school of Nursing.
You sound awfully bitter, SBE. I'm sorry you've had such a miserable time.

I don't understand why everyone thinks nursing isn't flexible, you can work overtime and still have 3 days a week off! yes the hours are long, but we work 3 days a week... maybe since I was a bartender before I was a nurse and I've never had a 9-5 I just don't get it, but to me it's the most flexible career that exists. If you need 9-5 hours, work in outpatient or radiology, if you need to come in after 7, work mid shifts in the ER, if your availability is sporadic, work agency and set your own availability. If you can't commit to the schedule you should take a different job.

I promise there is a job out there with a schedule that accommodates your life. It may not be in your dream specialty, but we all make sacrifices.

As far as not knowing about the hours ahead of time, did you ever have a conversation with ANY of your clinical preceptors? You had 2-4 years of time spent following someone around in the hospital and never bothered to ask them about the logistics of their work life? My students spend more time asking me for tips on scheduling, parking, interviewing, balancing work and home life, career opportunities, time management, self care, meal prepping for multiple shifts, unit politics, unit cultures, how to talk about work with their families, how to cope with stress and hard days, responding to bosses and bullies, and countless other non-care related questions than they do about skills and physiology. I usually get capstone students so I guess by this time they have all that down, but they almost always look for practical advice as much as they look for nursing knowledge.

If anyone spent all that time with their preceptors working on care plans in clinicals instead of asking questions about the career they were committing to, well that's on them.