Does nursing change you into an angry person?

[DesireeBeyerGreen]

I read a lot of posts and my aunt who has been an LPN for over twenty years has told me to stay far away from nursing. She works in LTC, I believe, mostly nursing homes. I don't think I have ever heard her say anything good about the field. I want to be a nurse. I admire the field and the men/women who do it every day. I think if I'm going to work and work hard it should be doing something that benefits mankind as a whole. I can't think of anything better than helping sick people. Corny, maybe, but I'm an corny person. My question is...does nursing turn you into an angry, bitter burnt out person. Only if you let it or is it just inevitable by how the whole system is set up?

My goal is to make a career out of nursing. I want to learn as much as I can and advance as far as I can go. I come from nothing, high school dropout, married young, kids young, and I'm one class away from being accepted into the LPN program. I want to make my children proud of me. What's your opinions nurses? Does your job make you a hateful person?

[Creamsoda, ASN, RN]

Depends. In some ways yes. You become very jaded and synical. I guess it depends where you work, but society crosses all spans of nursing fields so you will see it everywhere. For me im sick of people not taking care of them selves, not giving a crap about their own health, expecting pills and medicine to cure them. I find it disgusting actually. Im not angry, I'm just sick of societies need for a quick fix. In my normal life im a happy person, at work I fake it pretty well though :). And the beaurocracy of health care, the cost, the insurance companies ect get me going to

[NPAlby]

I don't think it's anger. I think it is an increased BS detector.

You quickly become aware of entitled people consider themselves to be.

Love this!!! Because it's so true.

To the orginal poster. If it sounds like something you want to do then do it. You have young mouths to feed and you can usually get a nursing job somewhere. You'll be fine.

[akulahawkRN, ADN, RN, EMT-P]

The same question could be asked of Paramedics, Cops, and Firefighters too. Why? They see the entire cross-section of society, and often they see the worst parts of it up close and personal more than they see the best parts. Does it make you angry, bitter, and burnt-out? No. But it's a huge predisposition to becoming that way. Only you can choose how you react to things. Only you can choose to stay positive. Only you can really determine how you look at life.

I'm just a student nurse, but I'm not new to healthcare. I've seen lots of sick and injured people over the years and after a while, it seems that pretty much everyone is sick somehow. The reality is that most people aren't. Some people are able to learn how to cope with that stress and some people aren't. When I leave work, I literally just "leave" it there and I don't revisit it unless I have to. Same thing goes for home.

Often, though, I find that I'm a bit desensitized to things that other people consider horrible. Trust me, that didn't happen over night. It doesn't mean that I don't care, rather it's a way for me to basically say "oh, that sucks..." and go ahead and "just do it."

So no, nursing (or healthcare in general, really) doesn't make you angry and bitter. Only you can choose that... but along the way, you may find that some aspects of your life and personality do change.

[wooh, BSN, RN]

Working with the public in any capacity makes you angry.

[WhereIsMyCallBell]

My feeling is this (and I have worked LTC as an RN almost 7 yrs). Your job can not turn you into anything. We all cope and deal with interpersonal, environmental and situational stress in different ways. Seems nursing somehow brings out either the best, or the worst in those of us who have chosen this path. CHOSE being the key word. Just as we have chosen this profession. We also make daily, hourly decisions and choices regarding how we deal with and react to our co-workers, mgmt, patients, families, MD's etc. I go into work each day making a very conscious choice to be pleasant, respectful and positive. Nothing, or no one can MAKE me be anything other than what I chose to be. Sure, circumstances arise that can challenge my outlook/attitude on any number of things. But allowing myself to become negative and nasty is completely counterproductive. The patient's pick up on the negativity, be sure of that. Think about it. Sometimes you, the professional nurse (and staff) might be the only human interaction our patient's have on a consistent basis. Especially those poor older folks who don't have loving families that come to visit. WE are all they have. It is SO NOT FAIR to the very prople who count on us to have to be exposed to our negativity. Plenty of nurses are hateful and negative with one another and then put on the phoney sweet smile for the matter of minutes they spend with a patient. Well maybe if the nurse wasn't so caught up in her/his own negative (bs). They just might spend an extra minute or two to be genuinely interested and concerned for the patient. Not just slap on a smile and get in and out of their room asap. Although compassion is not "cost effective", and even though we nurses are only human who can so easily let low staffing ratios, sub par mgmt, certain co-workers who may rub us the wrong way and so on... get under our skin so much so that it effects our professionalism, not to mention our productivity and what we project outwardly to others. Subconsciously those NURSES who DON'T strive everyday to make the right CHOICE to make the best out of resources (however limeted), to truly try and give our co-workers and our patients the benefit of the doubt, to make lemonade when lemons are being thrown at us from all directions. After so long it becomes increasing difficult to remain positive and it seems the stressors of just being a nurse in this day and age does effect some nurses who choose not to make a concerted, conscious effort EVERYDAY to stay positive, remain calm and not to start, or buy into the backstabbing and gossip that is running rampent in this profession. I don't know about others. I can only speak for myself. But in the grand scheme of things; I have found being pleasant and positive certainly makes my day better as well as those around me. I would rather go find another profession if I were really so unhappy and hateful in my position as a nurse whether RN, or LPN. My day, my attitude and what I project to others are a direct reflection of my desire and true essence of the nurse that I am. The nurse that I AM makes choices to remain consistently positive. When challenging situations are presented to me during my daily routine. I stop, take a deep breath. Remember the oath I took 7 years ago, which in turn inspires me to dig deep if I must and take a negative, then somehow, someway extract the positive and use it constructively if at all possible. If not, then learn valuable lessons from it in order to react to similar circumstances differently when they arise in the future. Bottom line is... and as I have stated all along. NOTHING and NO ONE can MAKE me be hateful and unhappy as much as it is how I decide to deal with and process things. Heck no! It is not always the easiest path at the time. In the long run though. It helps me keep my sanity and lets the patients who are entrusted to my care know that I am interested, invested and easy to approach with any concerns they may have. For most of these patient's, this is the roughest thing they have had to deal with in their lifves. I owe it to myself, to my patient's and to my employer to make good choices. I chose positive, compassionate care and am darn proud of it!!!

[joanna73, BSN, RN]

I'm more detached than before, particularly when it comes to talking about illness and death outside of work situations. Things that upset friends and family don't faze me.

Not that I don't care, or have some empathy, but nothing would shock me anymore. I'm also less willing to engage in drama in my personal life. Professionally, I'll handle whatever comes my way, but during my off hours, I need peace of mind.

[kayak007]

It is what you make it and you are what you make yourself to be.

[salvadordolly]

I think nursing as a career has more emotional ups and downs than do some other careers. My brothers are in engineering and computers, they do not seem to have the tumultuous career path that I have. On the other hand, their careers haven't forced them to grow spiritually. Nursing does. There definitely are some angry people in the health care field, but there are in other jobs too. You see a lot of human nature in this profession. I have had times when I've been an angry person, but this when I was younger. I was more idealistic and caught up in what nursing should be, instead of what it actually is. As many posters point out, if you take care of yourself, you won't turn into an angry person. Maybe a little cynical though. Go for it! You will have your ups and downs, but you will grow as a person.

[RNperdiem, RN]

Prolonged job stress, working with the public and having more responsibility than authority. Wash, rinse and repeat for 20 years, and I would fully expect at least some people to change into angry people.

[NotMyProblem MSN, ASN, BSN, MSN, LPN, RN]

I wouldn't exactly say angry. But I could live without the headache that I get between the hours of 1845-0715. Amazing how I get those only on the nights that I have to work.

[maelstrom143]

Nursing only makes you bitter if you allow it to do so...you are what you allow yourself to be and you will grow either positively or negatively, depending on how you choose to use your experiences. Nursing is a hard, rough profession and you must take each shift/day with a grain of salt and a wicked sense of humor because you will encounter stupidity, heartbreak, hilarious "I cannot believe you did/said/saw" that situations...you will see the gamut of the human experience and must realize it is not about you, but about the patient and situation, and leave work at work. Love hard, work harder, and never let them see you sweat under pressure. When the crap hits the fan, look at your patient, let them know you have their back, and take care of business.

If you hit saturation point on shift, go to a closed area and vent safely, then go back and keep on truckin'. If you reach saturation point as you go off shift, use the drive home to vent and let go of the day. Every day is a new beginning. The day you no longer look forward to doing your job, walk away and find something else that motivates you. Regardless whether you try it, hate it, love it, stick with it, go another route, having been a nurse will have made you better/smarter/harder to beat because it takes a special kind of person to look the crap in the eye and say,"bring it" with a grin when things go south.

The world is your oyster...enjoy it while you can. Life is too short to wonder whether you could have...

[hiddencatRN, BSN, RN]

My question is...does nursing turn you into an angry, bitter burnt out person.

No. In my experience, what turns you in to an angry, bitter and burnt out person is working a draining job that is a poor fit for you. Nursing certainly has the capability of being that job for many people, but honestly, when I worked as an administrative assistant, I felt wrung out, drained, old, and defeated. And I only worked at this job for 2 years in my mid 20's.

There are things that frustrate me about nursing, and there are positions I've had that are more frustrating and draining than others, but with the right specialty, even though there are shifts that do make me angry, overall I have a lot of satisfaction in what I do.