As a nurse, you've certainly heard doctors say some rather confounding things. As part of our 2019 celebration of National Nurses Week, we want you to share some of those things that come from the mouths of doctors which leave you shaking your head. Whether it's funny or infuriating, we want to hear it. You could win $250 courtesy of Jacksonville University just for sharing! Winners will be announced May 13, 2019.
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A fellow nurse was preparing to make a telephone call to a spanish speaking patient. Lab resulted a yeast infection. The fellow nurse asked me how to say yeast in spanish, I was not certain and we had asked another spanish speaking employee and she did know either, we started reviewing a spanish dictionary and google. During this process the Doctor, who spoke minimal spanish, said "infeccion de pan".
So, pan means bread in english, so he was thinking yeast and bread. However, pan is also used as a spanish slang term for vulva.
Fellow nurse and I looked at each other and held back our laughs and politely informed our provider how the word pan is used for spanish slang. The provider felt so horrible and no longer wanted to try speaking spanish. As the day went on he would just grin and at the end of the day we had a great laugh about it. The fellow nurse and I did not know if we should have informed him of the spanish slang, but he was so appreciative and informed us that he was so thankful and does not ever want to offend our spanish speaking community. We so enjoy working with our group of providers!!!
When I worked in the nursery we had a baby born that looked a little "off". The dr did some tests to see if the baby had some type of issues or delays and when I asked if any problems showed up he said, "Nope-just ugly!" ?
Picture this.....I am assisting a very small framed foreign physician in performing a pelvic examination on a 76 year old female who has never been examined in such a manner her entire lifetime. The usual explanations were given on the procedure. I have her positioned in stirrups and he begins to examine her. At this point she freaks out and will not comply with instructions and traps said physician's body (from chin to hips) between her tightly clamped legs and he can't get escape. I try to intervene while he yells, "HELP!" I have laughed over that for years.
Said to nurse with no patients in the room (thank God):
"I think there should be a Pain Rating Education Machine where we can hook the patients up, and turn the dial. "The scale is from 0-10. Now, this is what a 1 feels like, a 2, a 3, a 5, an 8. And here is what a 10 feels like! Now, do you still feel like the pain you are experiencing should really be rated a 20? Do you want to see what 20 would feel like? Or since you were able to walk in here, do you think you should lower that number some?" "
Had a doc tell me once “there is no way that person has lice, adults don’t get that!” Yes he was totally serious and then threw a specimen cup at me and told me if I was so smart to go gather them up.
Maclovia
20 Posts
A fellow nurse was preparing to make a telephone call to a spanish speaking patient. Lab resulted a yeast infection. The fellow nurse asked me how to say yeast in spanish, I was not certain and we had asked another spanish speaking employee and she did know either, we started reviewing a spanish dictionary and google. During this process the Doctor, who spoke minimal spanish, said "infeccion de pan".
So, pan means bread in english, so he was thinking yeast and bread. However, pan is also used as a spanish slang term for vulva.
Fellow nurse and I looked at each other and held back our laughs and politely informed our provider how the word pan is used for spanish slang. The provider felt so horrible and no longer wanted to try speaking spanish. As the day went on he would just grin and at the end of the day we had a great laugh about it. The fellow nurse and I did not know if we should have informed him of the spanish slang, but he was so appreciative and informed us that he was so thankful and does not ever want to offend our spanish speaking community. We so enjoy working with our group of providers!!!