This vile expression implies that experienced nurses do not treat new nurses kindly. My first problem with the statement is that it’s a generalization implying that all nurses are like that. Interestingly, whenever I hear someone utter the expression, I always say, “I don’t do that. Do you?” The person making the statement always says, “Oh no, I don’t, but many others do.” I’ve never heard even one nurse own up to doing this, although some nurses are willing to indict the entire profession. Every time that statement is repeated, it causes harm and casts a dark shadow on every nurse. Say anything enough, and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Please note that by moderator consensus some of the "Nurses Eat Their Young" posts will be referred to this thread where there can be an ongoing discussion, rather than several threads saying the same thing.
To students and new grads that are having problems with nurses, please take a moment to read the above link. Is it really the entire profession, every single nurse, or do you need help with one or a few nurses? We will be glad to help you in dealing with those people, but let bury the phrase "Nurses Eat Their Young".
To experienced nurses who claim our profession eats it's young, please take a moment to read it as well and think about it. Also take time to teach, be friendly and nurturing to the new nurse and students on your unit.
I'm a CNA, I've been one for 8 yrs now. I can honestly say there are some onederful nurses out there that would rather teach than put an aid or nurse to tears. That said, there are nurses that have reduced me to tears. One I recall was so mean, she told the administrator that it was her or me. I had done nothing wrong, the administrator addmited that. They chose the nurse.
I was considering starting nursing school this spring term. But I worked as a favor at a facility that I never worked before. Just for the weekend, they were short handed. One nurse was nasty to all the aids and I overheard her chew out another LPN. I dont believe she was any better than the other nurse. She wasn't her superior, she thought her title gave her more prestige and power. All it gave her was a facility full of hatred and from the aids, nurses and residents.
I dont know what I want to do now about my carrear. I could become one of those nasty nurses. I could end up working with one of those nurses. Or I could stay in the facility that I know, and the nurses are nice to me and everyone else.
Maybe I should say something to that grouchy nurse? Ah, it probably wouldn't do any good anyway. I have a month to think about what I should do. I even thought about being a CMA. There you go again, another grouchy nurse breathing down my neck.
Maybe I should say something to that grouchy nurse? Ah, it probably wouldn't do any good anyway. I have a month to think about what I should do. I even thought about being a CMA. There you go again, another grouchy nurse breathing down my neck.
Of course you should say something.
Not to single you out, but this is a major problem in our society today. People don't confront one another. There's a good book/course "Crucial Confrontations" that addresses this problem.
If everyone, every single time they felt slighted, abused, or eaten would confront the abuser, it might stop. Most of us are too afraid of confrontation, don't want to rock the boat, or think "it won't do any good anyway", or other reasons and it just continues.
I'm a CNA, I've been one for 8 yrs now. I can honestly say there are some onederful nurses out there that would rather teach than put an aid or nurse to tears. That said, there are nurses that have reduced me to tears. One I recall was so mean, she told the administrator that it was her or me. I had done nothing wrong, the administrator addmited that. They chose the nurse.
I was considering starting nursing school this spring term. But I worked as a favor at a facility that I never worked before. Just for the weekend, they were short handed. One nurse was nasty to all the aids and I overheard her chew out another LPN. I dont believe she was any better than the other nurse. She wasn't her superior, she thought her title gave her more prestige and power. All it gave her was a facility full of hatred and from the aids, nurses and residents.
I dont know what I want to do now about my carrear. I could become one of those nasty nurses. I could end up working with one of those nurses. Or I could stay in the facility that I know, and the nurses are nice to me and everyone else.
Maybe I should say something to that grouchy nurse? Ah, it probably wouldn't do any good anyway. I have a month to think about what I should do. I even thought about being a CMA. There you go again, another grouchy nurse breathing down my neck.
Hey, if you want to be a nurse don't let anyone stop you! I have had 4,well let me add 1 more nasty nurses as co-workers. That means I have had 5 that I feel have been very hurtful to me as a new nurse, but I have had at least 10 on our large unit who have been extraordinarily kind and helpful. The rest have been decent.
I haven't confronted the nasty people with the fact that they seem to be in a pattern of viciousness toward me however, I have confronted the behaviors, not everytime, but some of the time and as a result all but one has gotten much more respectful. The one who has not is the one that I have never confronted, because her nastiness is generally limited to her tone. Sort of how she says it rather than what she says.
My point is you get good and bad in the profession. The rewards of nursing so far have been great enough to make the rough spots bearable, even the first 6-9 months which in some ways were hell. A lot of it is the steep learning curve and the bad guys don't make it anybetter. The COPD patient who held my hand and thanked me for being such a good nurse and human being when all I had done was quickly lift his BiPap up from the bottom and give him a drink of water, put it back down quickly so that he didn't feel like he was smothering to death. It took me till now to figure out how to do this, but according to him, I was a miracle worker! You would have thought I gave the poor guy a million dollars. That is why I love nursing, getting to make someones life just a little better.
I hope that some day I will be as good as some of my colleagues, but everyday I learn a little more and get a little bit better than I was yesterday and the great thing is I get to learn from experience and from working with a lot of different colleagues who are willing to share their information and technique with me!
I use the dreaded phrase "Nurses do eat their young" but as many on here point out, NOT ALL NURSES eat their young, many teach and nurture. It is just that when you are on that learning curve which is steep at best, you feel like you are hanging on to a cliff with your fingernails and the nasty ones come along and stomp your fingers! You wll have to work with some jerks, and nursing is hard, especially early, but if you truely want to be a nurse it is all worth it.
Thankfully, I will probably never see that nurse again. I have confronted one nurse several years ago. She rote me up for insubordanince, I didn't think I was out of line or rude, she didn't agree. I dealt with being singled out for weeks, and the head nurse told me it was good that I stood up for myself. But she didn't stop the terrible treatment that I recieved. I was literally on my toes and peaking around corners. Hard to get work done that way.
On another subject, I called the college today and made an appt. to talk to a counseler. My husband did not want a nasty nurse to stand in my way of what I want to do.
To all the grouchy nurses out there, we all know your lurking. So, try to remember that everyone makes mistakes and its not your place to make life a living he** for the others. Most of the time bad communication is the problem.
Enough said, I need to go change my sons diaper, can't get enough of that butt wiping! LOL!! :yeah:
Not to single you out, but this is a major problem in our society today. People don't confront one another. There's a good good "Crucial Confrontations" that addresses this problem.
If everyone, every single time they felt slighted, abused, or eaten would confront the abuser, it might stop. Most of us are too afraid of confrontation, don't want to rock the boat, or think "it won't do any good anyway", or other reasons and it just continues.
Where can I find this info on Crucial Confrontations? Is there a link?
I work on a very busy L & d floor that had a long history of making life very hard on new nurses. It was brutal and many wonderful nurses were lost to blatant bullying. Finally an ingenious nurse created a Mentor program which has proved to be fabulously successful in shifting our culture to one of nurturing our new nurses instead of isolating/picking on new nurses. Each new nurse is assigned an experienced nurse as her "Mentor" once out of orientation. That nurse checks in regularly with the new nurse and acts as a "sounding board" if there are difficulties. The mentor can also act as mediator if there are issues with another nurse. After 6 months working on her own with the support of the Mentor, the new nurse has a "shower" thrown for her where she is bestowed with words of support and encouragement, "cut" from the support of her Mentor (long red licorice cords--what can I say, we're OB nurses) It brings everyone together in a culture consciously choosing to be gentle and supportive with our newbies. It has made a world of difference to retention. Makes us old nurses feel pretty good, too!
I'm hoping that I get that kind of support when the time comes. The future is scary, looking forward I'm not sure what will come and if I'll even make it through this.
Have to though, can't afford to pay back the grants.:chuckle
Sounds like good info. Do you know anything about confronting someone who consistantly speaks in a condescending tone of voice but doesn't ever say anything overtly abusive or derrogatory? So far I have just been ignoring the tone and using the information. This is the one person who I have had a problem with that I have not confronted and she continues to speak to me in a very condescending manner whenever I ask her for info and sometimes interjecting when I am delegating. Anyhow, any pointers would be appreciated.
Im a new nurse that started only 3 months ago. I've noticed that since day1, this one charge nurse is out to get me. She's always picking on me during our endorsement even though the info i gave has been endorsed days back and when others was saying it,she had no problem w/ it. She also always accuses me of making up excuses everytime I try to explain my side. I thought I was only paranoid but then,the other new nurses have also noticed. What do i do? Our head nurse is her bestfriend and has the same attitude as her. I've been thinking hard why the heck they are singling me out. We are 4 new here but the two don't treat the three the same way they treat me when we basically are coping up the same way in the floor.
Im a new nurse that started only 3 months ago. I've noticed that since day1, this one charge nurse is out to get me. She's always picking on me during our endorsement even though the info i gave has been endorsed days back and when others was saying it,she had no problem w/ it. She also always accuses me of making up excuses everytime I try to explain my side. I thought I was only paranoid but then,the other new nurses have also noticed. What do i do? Our head nurse is her bestfriend and has the same attitude as her. I've been thinking hard why the heck they are singling me out. We are 4 new here but the two don't treat the three the same way they treat me when we basically are coping up the same way in the floor.
With the charge nurses it can be hard especially when you are so new. Regardless, do the very best job you can. Listen for what she is criticizing you in you "endorsements." I am not sure what that is, probably what we call giving report. But the improtant thing is to try to learn what you can from what she is criticizing you about and if it something you can do differently then try it her way. Don't let her beat your ego down. She can say what she wants, but if you are a hard worker and keep pushing away, sooner or later she should respect that. I don't know the culture of the Phillipines, but here you can confront with courtesy and gain respect. I often actually learn from what the nasty ones are telling me, it is just hurtful when they are so disrespectful. I covet every bit of good info I can get however and I will use it even if they give it begrudgingly or in an effort to make me look bad.
You may be one of those folks who stand out. Just keep up the good work and you will shine.
It's true that some nurses are mean and demeaning to new nurses. One of the ways I dealt with them criticizing me was to admit that I wasn't very experienced and could you show me the "right" way to do it. Or, "You must have a short cut you"ve learned in your years of nursing" I just agreed that I was stupid etc. Also I would go out of my way to help them or talk nice about them to other people. Sometimes I think(hope) it made them ashamed to treat someone so nasty that was obviously working her tail off and still had time to get the supplies, sign for the pharmacy, answer the phone, or help any resident whether they were"mine" or not. I get along fairly well where I work, and I'm always willing to help or go the extra mile.
:yeah:
nursed away
4 Posts
I'm a CNA, I've been one for 8 yrs now. I can honestly say there are some onederful nurses out there that would rather teach than put an aid or nurse to tears. That said, there are nurses that have reduced me to tears. One I recall was so mean, she told the administrator that it was her or me. I had done nothing wrong, the administrator addmited that. They chose the nurse.
I was considering starting nursing school this spring term. But I worked as a favor at a facility that I never worked before. Just for the weekend, they were short handed. One nurse was nasty to all the aids and I overheard her chew out another LPN. I dont believe she was any better than the other nurse. She wasn't her superior, she thought her title gave her more prestige and power. All it gave her was a facility full of hatred and from the aids, nurses and residents.
I dont know what I want to do now about my carrear. I could become one of those nasty nurses. I could end up working with one of those nurses. Or I could stay in the facility that I know, and the nurses are nice to me and everyone else.
Maybe I should say something to that grouchy nurse? Ah, it probably wouldn't do any good anyway. I have a month to think about what I should do. I even thought about being a CMA. There you go again, another grouchy nurse breathing down my neck.