Do you LIKE every patient that walks through your door?

[Katie5]

God is love...WWJD..patience...get a grip...relax....calm down...take a breather...it's not so bad...sunny smile:).

All these I tell myself because I tell you, on some days you meet aggressive foul-mouthed patients and you KNOW given different circumstances your reaction would not be so mild. But you're their nurse, they are your babies, so you keep a lid on it, plaster a smile on your face and "c"ludge.....coddle them:)

"Them" are the days:nurse::redpinkhe

[SolaireSolstice, BSN, RN]

No, I very much dislike some of my patients. But my challenge every day is to treat them all the same.

The sad thing is often those patients who I dislike the MOST are the ones I end up having to spend the most time with, at the expense of the nice, compliant patients. Yesterday, our team had 7 patients, and I ended up spending 75% of my time in the room of 2 of them because of their "issues". As I made my last set of rounds before I left for the day, I walked into one of the patients room and I had to check my worksheet to be sure it was my patient because I couldn't remember having ever gone in that room. I know I had been in there. My handwriting was on the board in the room and I had, at some point, done the patient's I/O. But my concentration was obviously on the ones whose faces I'm trying to mentally block out right now.

[HealthShepherd]

I find it strange that the question is even being asked. Are there people in the world who like everybody they encounter? Or is there a perception at play here that nurses are some sort of angelic being capable of liking everybody?

[mamamerlee, LPN]

I worked in a jail - - the 'likeable' one were few and far between....

[tewdles, RN]

Honestly, I do like most of my patients....the families, not so much. But, it is part of the job. As said before, nobody "likes" everybody, but a good professional can still provid excellent care regardless of the "feelings".

This is an issue in all professions....

Imagine a teacher who does not "like" a student...stuck with MONTHS of close interaction. LTC nurses face this as well...

For the rest of us, the folks come and go and we do our jobs regardless of whether or not the patients are "likeable".

[CoffeemateCNA]

Heck no, I don't like every patient.

People are good and bad and everything in between. Just because I'm assigned to care for someone does not mean I have to be best friends with them. There are mean people, whiny people, and annoying people. They spit, hit, kick, cuss, shout, and pull hair. I give them the same care as people I "like," and I do it with the same smile on my face. I do my job and I leave. I just keep my feelings about them to myself.

Oh, and I silently thank God when these types of patients leave.

However, there are also patients that I love to care for and they make my job worth while.

[cherrybreeze, ADN, RN]

Of course not. Do you like everyone you encounter in any OTHER situation? No. Therefore it wouldn't be reasonable to expect to like every patient that comes your way, either.

Luckily, it's not our job to "like" them. It's our job to take care of them during their injury/illness. Being able to do this, and liking the patient, are independent of each other. If you do your job well, they'll never know how you REALLY feel...

[tewdles, RN]

I think for me, working in hospice, I can find things to like about each of my patients...

Sure, some of them are controlling, sometimes rude or crude, sometimes they stink to high heaven or have really bad habits or behaviors...but in hospice, they all have one thing in common...their doctors have told them they have maybe 6 months to live (often much less). The pedi patient and the geri patient now belong to the same group...the dying patient.

They share that emotional cocktail of sadness, confusion, anger, fear, etc...and this gives them a vulnerability which generates significant amounts of compassion. The compassion helps us to be much more tolerant, I think, of the "unlikeable" attributes of the patient in hospice.

I do have to admit that I have had patients that, under different circumstances, I most certainly would not have liked...and probably vice versa.

[cherrybreeze, ADN, RN]

I think for me, working in hospice, I can find things to like about each of my patients...

Sure, some of them are controlling, sometimes rude or crude, sometimes they stink to high heaven or have really bad habits or behaviors...but in hospice, they all have one thing in common...their doctors have told them they have maybe 6 months to live (often much less). The pedi patient and the geri patient now belong to the same group...the dying patient.

They share that emotional cocktail of sadness, confusion, anger, fear, etc...and this gives them a vulnerability which generates significant amounts of compassion. The compassion helps us to be much more tolerant, I think, of the "unlikeable" attributes of the patient in hospice.

I do have to admit that I have had patients that, under different circumstances, I most certainly would not have liked...and probably vice versa.

I totally understand this point of view. I don't work in hospice, but I really think I would enjoy doing it, having worked with hospice patients before. It's much easier to let go of those things that you don't like given that situation.

[Kittyfeet]

I was one of those delusional people that didn't realize that my feelings wouldn't stop when I got my RN. I never thought about how much I might *not* like some of them. After working for years doing front desk customer service type things I should have been prepared that people would drive me crazy. I felt really guilty about it until I realized I was only human and that I treat everyone with respect and the best care I can give regardless of how kind or rude they are. I also felt even more guilty about getting annoyed by patients who really can't help it. We can't help having feelings. I think so far I have learned to grow a thicker skin and not take some people's behavior personally. Sometimes I have to remind myself but I'm working on it all the time :)

[Katie5]

I find it strange that the question is even being asked. Are there people in the world who like everybody they encounter? Or is there a perception at play here that nurses are some sort of angelic being capable of liking everybody?

Humor me, if you will. By "like", no one is advocating being all buddy-buddy with the patient. But there is certain sense of expectation , that since this person is in the hospital, he/she would watch their foul language and try to get better and leave.

Hope that makes better sense to you.

[cherrybreeze, ADN, RN]

Humor me, if you will. By "like", no one is advocating being all buddy-buddy with the patient. But there is certain sense of expectation , that since this person is in the hospital, he/she would watch their foul language and try to get better and leave.

Hope that makes better sense to you.

That expectation will go away quickly.

Not sure what that expectation has to do with "liking" them, either. Even if someone does all the things they're supposed to, you may not 'like" them; not all personalities are going to mesh well.

[leslie :-D]

Humor me, if you will. By "like", no one is advocating being all buddy-buddy with the patient. But there is certain sense of expectation , that since this person is in the hospital, he/she would watch their foul language and try to get better and leave.

cherrybreeze is right, about that expectation is just plain unrealistic.

if anything, those 'model' pts are the exception and not the rule.

most pts are vulnerable & cranky, which is when you'll typically see uncontrollable demands, anxieties and obnoxiousness.

i've had some doozies...

and right now am recalling an end-stage aids pt who had led a very promiscuous life.

even in the hospice facility, he would try and grab nurse's and aide's heads, lowering them to his genitals.

this guy was truly obnoxious and angry.

and katie, i'm like you, that i need a poker face.

my eyes tell all, and it isn't always pretty.

leslie