Do I Love Nursing? What Day Is It?

Purple_Scrubs, BSN, RN

There are days when nothing seems to go right. Every teacher is mad because I won't send a kid home that, in their "medical" opinion, needs not to be in their class. Every parent is mad because I am asking for a doctor's note to re-admit their child who has symptoms of strep, or pink eye, or whatever contagious disease du jour. Every administrator wants my help with Project A or wants me to babysit student X, and I have two reports due this week and one that is already late. These are the days that every frequent flyer to the nurse's office decides, as if in unison, that he or she is "sick". These are the days that the Pre-K teacher discovers lice crawling on the heads of at least two of her students. These are the days I fantasize about a boring, low paying, and low responsibility office job like the ones of my past. Or about changing professions altogether (you know, Vet school is not really all THAT much money, is it?)

These are also the days that I reflect on the problems that the profession of nursing faces, and wonder if they will ever be solved. I remember vividly why I left the hospital setting for school nursing, and I think about my brothers and sisters in the struggle who are still there. I think about the impossible paperwork, the impossible staffing ratios, and the impossible goal of perfection. I remember the loneliness of working nights while the rest of the world sleeps, and the sadness I felt when I would arrive home ready to drop just as my husband was leaving for work. Two ships passing in the night.

Then I think about some of the poignant stories I read on All Nurses. I remember the new grads who feel they are being served for dinner to the more experienced nurses, and I remember feeling just like them. I think about the new grads who cannot find jobs in this economy, while the rest of the country still seems to think there is a nursing shortage. I think about those nurses who have been scapegoated by co-workers or administrations. I remember the nurses who are devastated because of an error they made, which in reality is more of a system error than an individual weakness. Regardless, the nurse takes the blame. All these stories and more color my perception nursing on these such days.

Then, there are the days that are good. Something a child says touches my heart or tickles my funny bone. A teacher, parent, or administrator tells me to thank you, and I know they mean it. The student who I have been trying to get an eye exam for months dances into my office to show off her cute new glasses. I get a hug. I get a smile. I leave work knowing that I made a difference in the life of at least one child.

On these days, I remember vividly why I left the ho-hum world of office work, and I cannot imagine ever returning to that. In all honesty, I still feel the faint tug of Vet school, but it is suppressed (for now at least ). I feel uplifted on these days, thankful for my blessings and loving my work and my career.

I still think about the stories I read on AN even on these good days. However, on the good days, I think about empowering nurses to do something to improve our collective situation. No one who accepts the status quo can change it. I am encouraged by stories of nurses standing up for one another. I think of the stories of leadership and I am proud to be in the same ranks as these phenomenal nurses. I think about the funny stories and marvel at how we can keep our collective sense of humor in the most trying of times. I am optimistic about where nursing is headed and I can't wait to be a part of the revolution.

So, how do I feel about nursing? Well, today is Friday, that always helps!

Do I Love Nursing? What Day Is It?

About Purple_Scrubs, BSN, RN

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