Disappointed

HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD · Sep 29, 2016

Sorry you're disappointed. I took a look at your previous posts & saw that you were asking for information about how Kaplan differs from HESI - this is probably not something that many people know about because they have not taken both exams. Sometimes, low response rates happen because the question was not clearly worded or no one has any relevant information to offer.

It seems like you are taking everything very personally. This isn't Facebook - no one here knows you so it's highly unlikely that anyone doesn't "like" you. We're not your family, neighbors or close acquaintances. If you don't get the responses you need, try re-wording the question or just realize that no one has any information to offer.

I would also strongly advise you to change your avatar if that is your picture. It's very important to remain anonymous on any public forum, particularly one that may have an impact upon your professional goals. I do wish you (and all aspiring nurses) the best of luck on your educational journey.

nerdy student · Sep 29, 2016

In figure some one would say something like that. I never once said anything about being liked or not like, I'm perfectly confident and comfortable with myself with or without your "like" or dislike. I don't have a Facebook or any other social media sites, I don't need that noise in my life. And how exactly am I taking everything personally? Yes I did post something about how frustrated I was about the exams and howbibwas considering quitting, but I have come along ways. How exactly we're my post hard to read or need to be reworded? When I meant family, I meant in a metaphorical sense, a community that bands together to help people like them, but it seems I am mistaken.

Wuzzie · Sep 29, 2016

The thing about most forums is they aren't support groups and they aren't family (and nowhere does AN claim to be). They are strangers on the internet. We don't know you so how could we possibly tell you how many hours you should study? Or even how to study. Everybody is different. The other thing you need to know is nursing isn't a family either. My co-workers are just co-workers. Of course I care about them and over the years made a handful of actual friends but they are in no way my family. I suppose some people may have closer relationships with their co-workers but that doesn't always work out so well. Here on AN you will find all sorts of folks but the vast majority are not the mushy kind. Most of us are very down to earth, straight shooters. I'm afraid you might find that distasteful. I'm also pretty sure this thread might raise the ire of a few of our saltier members. Asbestos undies might be appropriate.

I want to warn you that when you become a nurse and you go to orientation for your first job on the very first day the hospital CEO will tell you all about how "we are a family" just think to yourself "well, yeah, the Manson family" and you'll be alright! :roflmao:

Also wanted to add, someone already pointed you to one of their posts that was all about Kaplan.

NewMurse1014 · Sep 29, 2016

Seems like you became very defensive when HouTx offered the opinions in a matter-of-fact attitude. "Sometimes, low response rates happen because the question was not clearly worded or no one has any relevant information to offer." Notice the phrase "or no one has any relevant information to offer." That's probably the reason why your post had a low response rate.

Regarding your original question, I've only taken the HESI exams. I graduated last year and compared to NCLEX questions, HESI questions were easier. I've never taken the Kaplan entrance exam so I can't offer any insight on that.

Lastly as a friendly suggestion, be more open and less defensive in the future when someone offers his/her opinions. You might learn something and it will help you greatly when you start working as nurse.

nerdy student · Sep 29, 2016

How was I defensive? I was simply asking how it was hard to understand so that I may be more effective in posting in the future.

nerdy student · Sep 29, 2016

You all are absolutely right in all that you have said.

nerdy student · Sep 29, 2016

I'm a pediatric cancer survivor with 2 autoimmune diseases and half a pelvis, I've been wearing asbestos panties since I was 10.

nerdy student · Sep 29, 2016

I've asked several question on how I can be more clear, and no response. People we're quick to criticize but not give me help to my questions. Should I reword them?

nerdy student · Sep 29, 2016

I've asked several question on how I can be more clear, and no response. People we're quick to criticize but not give me help to my questions. Should I reword them?

TuesdaysChild · Sep 29, 2016

This site is supposed to be a place where nurses and future nurses can come for advice and support, and since I have joined I have barely seen that. I have posted several topics asking for help with an entrance exam, and not one person has replied. I'm not asking for a flood of responses, but one would have been more then enough. For people who claim that their a 'family', you don't treat people who are wanting to become part if your family very well. I'm very disappointed and a little hurt that not one person could extend a hand to help a struggling student.

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. A lot of times when reactions come very naturally to us, we are completely oblivious to how they are perceived by others. For instance, when you say "I'm very disappointed and a little hurt...", that is an indicator that a lack of responses is being taken personally. Maybe there's a slight possibility that's not what's happening, but when you're on a forum full of strangers, all you can really do is go with the law of averages. From the POV of someone perceiving your comment, "disappointed" and "hurt" are personal feelings, so something is being taken personally. It's the same for sounding defensive. Tone and intent really can't be transmitted, so all anyone can go on is the typical meaning of what and how you're saying it. In a typical interaction, statements like your first response indicate defensive positioning. But like I said, there are so many things that often come naturally to us individually that we're blinded to public perception.

For what it's worth, I can say that, A, if I see the title of a thread and I already know I don't have any substantive information to add, I don't respond to it because I already have the attention span of a fruit fly. And quite frankly, I rarely even sift through the different categories. I mostly just glance through what's trending and then get sidetracked with something else that caught my attention.

I'm not a particularly salty person. I definitely have feelings. Although I try not to give them any weight in most situations, I do find it's helpful in understanding others and how certain things may make them feel, even if they themselves don't fully realize it. All that's to say, it's okay to not get any replies and feel kind of:

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But you gotta get out of your head for a few minutes and examine it from an impersonal perspective. Then it seems much less personal and more just the norms of anonymous online forums.

AliNajaCat · Sep 29, 2016

Look, it doesn't look like anybody has a good answer for your original question. You know what they say about prayer-- God hears all your requests, but sometimes the answer is "No," LOL, or "Line's busy, call again later," LOL.

Maybe think about reading the questions other people get answers for and see if this is where you ought to be to get what you want?

As to whether you will find what you want here, well, things change. There are many online sites that accommodate students and nurses with a need for community. You are always free to choose. If it's not here, then it's maybe somewhere else, or it might be here later. Hang in.

Finally, some of the best advice I ever got was about work "friends." Your work friends are not your friends unless you visit each other's houses or go out together. I have had close relationships with many people at work over the years, but once our professional association ceased for one reason or another, we never saw or heard from each other again. That's the nature of work. It's not specific -- or unusual -- for nursing. Think about this experience as practice for real life. :)