difficult nurse and ways to boost morale

DutchgirlRN, ASN, RN · Oct 17, 2005

i just took over a unit and there is this nurse where she is so moody i dont know how to approach her. i am a pretty straightforward person but she seems like such a b---h half the time and doesnt talk to anyone and will occasionally make a joke but has a dry sense of humor. i need help approaching her because my patience is short with her ....
also, i need help in boosting morale on my unit. the admin. didnt do anything for nurses day this year and the whole staff is still burned by this and morale for their job and the facility is gone....

The moody nurse will likely not change her ways. Talk to and treat her just like you do the other nurses and if she is inappropriate let her know it from the get go. You'll have a chance to make it up the the other nurses come Nurses Day 2006 in the meantime maybe you or one of the allnurses.com nurses could come up with ways to show your approval for what they are doing. Good Luck

Stephanie in FL · Oct 17, 2005

What about doing something nice for your nurses for one or more of the holidays coming up (Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas)? Something like a party or potluck or you could do small gifts for them at Christmas.

Stephanie RN

KatieBell · Oct 17, 2005

One thing that really boosted my morale was a handwritten note from my manager after a difficult code. Her office is right beside the trauma room. I had not realized she was there, but she had been, and left me a little note telling me that she felt I had done an excellent job. It doesn't take a lot to do that.

Could you maybe get one of the local movie theatres to donate some tickets- and you could enclose a pair of movie tickets in the note???

Daytonite, BSN, RN · Oct 17, 2005

As a new unit manager I wouldn't try to change any nurses attitude for awhile until you've observed how she acts while you are manager for a little while. Otherwise, you could have a full blown revolt on your hands. You don't necessarily know what friendships she has with other staff that she could use to sabotage any strides you are trying to make. As long as she's doing her work, let her attitude be for the moment. If her behavior becomes a source of complaints then you will have to address that. If this nurse turns and walks away from you when you are telling her something, that is subordination and you have a difficult employee on your hands and you'll have to address that issue. There are a number of books on the market on how to deal with difficult employees for under $20. My favorite is Managing Difficult People: A Survival Guide for Handling Any Employee by Marilyn Pincus. It's about 7 inches by 4 inches, a half inch thick and reads easily. It's nicely indexed in the back and you can navigate to places you want to read by looking at the table of contents. They are a good investment for a manager who has to deal with an employee with an attitude problem. I would read up on dealing with this kind of person first and make a game plan of how to talk with her assertively before having any confrontations with her about her behavior. Remember not to lose your cool if you must confront, and to do it out of the earshot of other employees. Another reason to study up on this subject is in case you confront her and she starts to throw a tantrum to get the attention of her co-workers. You need to know how to handle that kind of situation if it should happen. I'd also look around for one of the one day seminars for nurses on Dealing with Difficult Employees or Management for the First Time Supervisor. They make the rounds of the country every couple of months and it will be a good review of assertiveness techniques as well as information on how to apply and use discipline.

Bring donuts some morning for your staff. Get the dates of the birthdays of your staff from whoever does personnel and make it a point to make those birthdays special days for the birthday person (cupcakes, take a collection and order pizza delivery for your staff to share, a card signed by everyone). Halloween is coming up and Thanksgiving--perfect times to do a little decorating or have some candy around for the staff. Make it a point to try to write up a letter or memo of praise on each staff member that really deserves it. Recognize the small things that the staff does that people normally complain they do and no one notices--start noticing and make sure everyone hears the verbal praise you give. That will boost morale more than any little gifts. Also, listen to what people tell you. As a new manager they will test you. If there have been issues that they have been complaining about and no one has been listening or doing anything about them, you will gain a lot of trust and favor if you become known as a leader who listens and takes care of problems. The skill of listening is very important because many employees cannot or will not articulate the true problem they have so you will need to depend on your powers of listening and observation.

achot chavi · Oct 23, 2005

I know exactly what your going through. When I first became a PCC I really tried hard to be popular and I bought a coffee machine and a toaster for the staff room and I tried being nice. I discovered that you have to be tough and its better to start tough but fair. Always have a listening ear but put the patients needs first. If this nurse is hurting patients with her moody attitude perhaps put her on nights where she cant hurt any one elses mood. I think patients need a positive attitude during the day hours. If she were to ask I'd tell her straight, If she were not to ask I'd be curious whats going on to make her so moody.Lol

Cewens · Oct 23, 2005

Recently I have thought that I have become one of those "difficult" nurses. I just left a job where I was part of a very tight team, felt loved, supported and valued by my fellow nurses. In my new position I am running into personality issues that I never thought I had, and am beginning to think that I am the cause of them. After raising 4 children & having a very stable family life, things took a turn for the worse when we discovered that our son was addicted to Meth & Crack and had suicide issues, I seem to be handling things differently and find that my emotions are on edge constantly. One thing different on my new job is that my Managers & Charges know about my situation but never ask me how I am coping which makes me feel like just a number on their staffing census. I really enjoy my fellow nurses and feel badly about the small misunderstandings we have been experiencing and keep trying to keep an even keel at work and not let things affect me so much. But in reality, it is hard to leave everything at home. I am sure that there are other nurses who are battling difficult personal issues which may effect them at work as well. I would suggest to the managers to try and find a way to show interest in a "difficult" nurse's life, and let them know that you care about them individually. It would make a world of difference to me.

Little Panda RN, ASN, RN · Oct 23, 2005

Recently I have thought that I have become one of those "difficult" nurses. I just left a job where I was part of a very tight team, felt loved, supported and valued by my fellow nurses. In my new position I am running into personality issues that I never thought I had, and am beginning to think that I am the cause of them. After raising 4 children & having a very stable family life, things took a turn for the worse when we discovered that our son was addicted to Meth & Crack and had suicide issues, I seem to be handling things differently and find that my emotions are on edge constantly. One thing different on my new job is that my Managers & Charges know about my situation but never ask me how I am coping which makes me feel like just a number on their staffing census. I really enjoy my fellow nurses and feel badly about the small misunderstandings we have been experiencing and keep trying to keep an even keel at work and not let things affect me so much. But in reality, it is hard to leave everything at home. I am sure that there are other nurses who are battling difficult personal issues which may effect them at work as well. I would suggest to the managers to try and find a way to show interest in a "difficult" nurse's life, and let them know that you care about them individually. It would make a world of difference to me.

Cewens, may GOD be with you during this very difficult time. Here is sending hugs your way. I am so sorry to hear about your son. I pray for strength for you, your son and your family at this time.

psalm, RN · Oct 24, 2005

I know exactly what your going through. When I first became a PCC I really tried hard to be popular and I bought a coffee machine and a toaster for the staff room and I tried being nice. I discovered that you have to be tough and its better to start tough but fair. Always have a listening ear but put the patients needs first. If this nurse is hurting patients with her moody attitude perhaps put her on nights where she cant hurt any one elses mood. I think patients need a positive attitude during the day hours. If she were to ask I'd tell her straight, If she were not to ask I'd be curious whats going on to make her so moody.Lol

...night shift is usually stretched to the limits with trying to provide compassionate care, but with a load of 5-9 pts. with 6-8 being the norm on my floor, I would NOT want to see this person put there with her current attitude. She would see being sent to nights as punishment...and then what do you think her attitude would be?

...maybe go one on one with her and ask how things are going, are there any ideas she has to help with making the floor a more pleasant place to work, if she doesn't now, she can always come to you in the future with suggestions.