DH dying-need prayers

Specialties Hospice

Published

I've posted before about my husband being terminally ill and complications that have come up, but this is the worst it has every been. Currently in ICU with ARDS and sepsis, placed on dialysis yesterday. On a vent, paralytic, the whole works.

Miraculously he has been showing signs of improvement. CXR went from a complete white out to having distinguishable upper lobes, heart, ET. That was amazing. Has been running a PEEP of 20. Went in this morning to a stunned looking pulmonologist telling me that the lungs are regaining some elasticity so they got the PEEP down to 8. (PTL!)

I have been glued to his bedside but am home tonight as I had nobody to take care of our 5 year old. Besides she is desperate for some mommy time and vice versa. I was actually sleeping peacefully and his brother called and woke me up. Couldn't go back to sleep and felt God telling me to get on here and get as many prayers as possible going so that dh can get over the hump. My brother in law is an atheist but I continue to witness to him about God in my life and God's ability to heal if it is in his will.

Please, all you that can pray, please help me out on this one. His name is Dan and I love him more than anything. He had not made a decision for the Lord before he was intubated so that is a big reason for wanting him to wake up and have one more chance.

Thanks in advance to all. You guys are wonderful support.

It's all over now. Lots of people came for the visitation last night and there were lots of beautiful flowers (and lots of ugly plants). Dan would have felt so honored. The funeral home did a wonderful job with him, especially considering what they had to work with. My pastor gave a wonderful eulogy. Lots of people came to the grave side service, even though it was about 30 degrees, windy and raining. The cemetery had plots available right beside his family which is a miracle, I think, and gives me more peace about him being there. (My dad had given us plots with my family, but Dan thought I would (and he wanted me to) get remarried some day so he didn't want to be stuck in my home town "not knowing anybody". My feelings were hurt over it and I didn't think he would be able to get anywhere near his family, so I'm ok with it now.) There were some issues with his family and a friend that really upset me, but I'm not going to burn anymore daylight thinking about it. The family apologized today (which didn't make me feel any better last night) and I never have to talk to the friend again. Someday he'll realize that he would not still be Dan's friend if Dan were alive to see how he treated me. All in all, it was a wonderful tribute to my darling. I'm going to miss him so much.

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Specializes in Home Health, Hospice.

:icon_hug: Joey and JoEllen :icon_hug: My prayers are still with you. I'm sorry you had to deal with 1 horrible person thru all this but you have the right attitude about just letting it go. It sounds as if everything else went okay. Remember that we're here for you when you need to talk. Take care of yourself and DD.

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{{{{HUGS}}}}

The Lord has blessed you with much wisdom and strength. And you're not letting the turkeys get you down! Good for you! JoEllen is blessed to have you for a mom. You both remain in my prayers. God bless you.

Marilyn

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Specializes in Psych, Med/Surg, Home Health, Oncology.

Joey,

You and your daughter remain in my thoughts and prayers.

Please let us continue to support you. Let us know how you are doing.

Mary Ann

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Specializes in Cardiac/Telemetry.

Joey,

I'm sorry you had to go through a bit more horror. (You know the devil has to have a last jab) However, God has been there for you. I pray for your strength and I hope you know that we are here for you. God bless you always.

Mave.

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(((joey))),

you just never cease to amaze me with your strength and grace.

i'm glad you could take dan's ex-friend for what it was worth, which was obviously total crap.

as for his family, people can say the most amazing things when grieving.

please don't take it personally.

be kind to yourself in these forthcoming days.

take time to pamper yourself, drown your love in joellen, talk to God, talk to dan....take it one miute, one hour, one day at a time. seek therapy if need be. it's a process for sure. my heart aches for you and your daughter yet somehow, i strongly feel you'll be ok.

again, don't hesitate to come to us for ANYTHING. we'll get you through this.:icon_hug:

with prayers and affection,

leslie xo

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:icon_hug: for all that you are going through.

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He is at peace and at rest...may you and your daughter find the peace and the comfort that you need in your faith and in the love and prayers coming your way from all of us here.

you will be in my prayers.

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Just checking in to let you know that I'm still hanging in. Dealing with social security, equipment, financial matters, and stuff like that today. Still doesn't seem real most of the time. Of course I still want to pick up the phone and call my dad, and he's been gone for nearly 5 years. I think I'm progressing as expected. JoEllen is doing very well. Having been raised in church and being here to see the decline in Dan has made her pretty accepting of the situation. She thinks it is great that he's in Heaven not being sick and suffering, talking to our dead relatives and playing with all my dead pets. But she understands that mommy is heartbroken. Yesterday she asked if I thought my heart was completely broken in two or if it was just kinda split. She's very sweet.

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Just checking in to let you know that I'm still hanging in. Dealing with social security, equipment, financial matters, and stuff like that today. Still doesn't seem real most of the time. Of course I still want to pick up the phone and call my dad, and he's been gone for nearly 5 years. I think I'm progressing as expected. JoEllen is doing very well. Having been raised in church and being here to see the decline in Dan has made her pretty accepting of the situation. She thinks it is great that he's in Heaven not being sick and suffering, talking to our dead relatives and playing with all my dead pets. But she understands that mommy is heartbroken. Yesterday she asked if I thought my heart was completely broken in two or if it was just kinda split. She's very sweet.

very happy to hear from you joey.:icon_hug: your sweet joellen sounds amazing. young children never cease to amaze me with their sensitivity, resiliency and insight. and her perception of dad no longer suffering and being reunited w/relatives and pets is sooooo very comforting.

do not hesitate to seek the services of a therapist to see you through this.

i know you're going to miss dan so very much and it pains me to know what you'll be enduring. yet somehow, i feel you will emerge from this journey as a more vibrant, strong and impassioned woman. pm me anytime at all.

leslie xo

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Specializes in Cardiac/Telemetry.
Just checking in to let you know that I'm still hanging in. Dealing with social security, equipment, financial matters, and stuff like that today. Still doesn't seem real most of the time. Of course I still want to pick up the phone and call my dad, and he's been gone for nearly 5 years. I think I'm progressing as expected. JoEllen is doing very well. Having been raised in church and being here to see the decline in Dan has made her pretty accepting of the situation. She thinks it is great that he's in Heaven not being sick and suffering, talking to our dead relatives and playing with all my dead pets. But she understands that mommy is heartbroken. Yesterday she asked if I thought my heart was completely broken in two or if it was just kinda split. She's very sweet.

Joey,

I was thinking about you today. I was hoping to hear from you. I'm glad I did. It's common for you to go through feelings like these. You are a strong and wonderful woman. You and JoEllen are both very sweet and amazingly strong. Keep your head up; time will heal your "kinda split" heart, and you will be fine. Remember, "SOMEBODY UP THERE LOVES YOU!!!!":Melody: :icon_hug:

and somebody down here loves you too. MANY OF US!!!! God bless.

Mave.

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Joey, so glad to hear from you! Sending hugs and good wishes to you and JoEllen. We're still here for you if you need to talk. :icon_hug:

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