Death stories?

*LA* · Apr 12, 2005

Weird, bizarre, peaceful or totally memorable occasions that you observed death, any stories?
I don't mean to be morbid or anything but I am looking for ways to improve our service in the ICU and put togheter a folder and info. system to help our dear patients.
I'll tell you my last experience soon, got to get over it first!
Thanks!

Im so sorry that I didnt see this thread. I just now wrote something that I think would fit. I'll see if I can cut/paste it and put it in here in this thread

*LA* · Apr 12, 2005

Im so sorry that I didnt see this thread. I just now wrote something that I think would fit. I'll see if I can cut/paste it and put it in here in this thread

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*** this probably doesnt fit here, since its a personal experience, but I left it here anyway*** ( I can probably delete it if needed)

Ok, well, here goes.

m new here. I actually found this site when I was looking for "white nurses clogs". I googled that phrase and a journal from this site came up. ( Im going back to work soon, after being home for 4 yrs and am nervous about it, so while i was here, I posted in the OR section, if anyone has any tips, feel free to share them there on my thread. thanks)

Anyway, here goes

long story short, my mother was given 6 months (Ca).

she was NOT religious woman, in fact, she sort of made fun of people who were devout.

well, it had been 5 days since she was released from the hospital, to go home and etc.....

she wasnt ale to walk so she was in bed.

well, that day, she was very lucid and making perfect sense. I was waiting for a delivery (pain meds) from the pharmacy and worried that she would be in pain. she wasnt complaining. she was very clear headed. I was in the other room when she screamed for me to "get in here this minute". when I went into he room, she insisted that I "get rid of that man right now" (she was very angry. she went on to tell me that he refused to leave and she wouldnt have a strange man in her room. there was no one in there. she was sooo insistant and so clear headed that I actually thought that someone has maybe broken in, knowing we had strong pain meds in the house etc etc

well, this went on and on all day long, and each time that I went into her room, she was having a definate conversation with someone?? she actually seemed to be listenning and would stop and them respond "no, Im not going anywhere, I dont know you and you dont tell me what to do anyway"

I was actually getting scared because she seemd so insistent and coherant.

Ok, so the end of the day, she tells my sister that "this man here is telling me that if I go with him, I wont be in pain anymore" ( she had metastatic breast ca). then she calls me in and say to me, "here take this, its a check for your borthday and I want you to have it" (my birthday was the next day). that week she had been given 6 months and I told her that she could give it to me herself tomorrow.

So, went to bed.

when we went in her room the next morning, she was gone.

I am STILL trying to make sense of what went on that last day and I dont have an explanation.

Has anyone ever heard of anything like this happenning before?

I still dont know what to make of it.

thanks

LA

ps I am not crazy, cross my heart

*LA* · Apr 12, 2005

Weird, bizarre, peaceful or totally memorable occasions that you observed death, any stories?
I don't mean to be morbid or anything but I am looking for ways to improve our service in the ICU and put togheter a folder and info. system to help our dear patients.
I'll tell you my last experience soon, got to get over it first!
Thanks!

Again, Im sorry of this doesnt fit. I am an RN but I work in the OR and Ive rarely seen death there. This is another personal experience but it relates to how the nurse dealt with "us",

my father had alzheimers and my mother had been dead for almost a year when he was hospitalized with pneumonia. he was actually on the upswing after 5 days on IV antibiotics and then one day., he woke up, and smiled at me, and waved and went to sleep. his labs came in from the noight before and the doc looked startled when he read them (my dad had been doing great) he called us (me and my husband) out of the room, everything was suddenly failing. every system. he told us not to go anywhere........

well, long story short, this wonderful nurse came in and sat with us. Im sure she had other things to do but she sat with us. she asked my moms name,(nancy) and she quietly said to my dad (his eyes were closed and his breathing was shallow)

"go on Ed, its OK to go. Nancy is waiting for you. your daughters are fine, go on, its Ok to go now"

then he peacefully took a breath and died.

Im not a mushy type person, but what this woman, this nurse did, really was wonderful.

I cant explain why, but it was.....

I know that youre looking for stories from us, as nurses experiences but this si what Ive got

rosemadder · May 11, 2005

I have noticed a few patients on the day they pass speaking to loved ones who are deceased. I had one man who had had a motor vehicle accident and had brain issues going on...he hadn't spoke since the accident (greater than a week) and the day I got him as a patient he began talking to his mother (who was deceased). His family mentioned that he had not been bathed in a few days so I asked the assistant if she would give him a bath that day. Later he grabbed my hand at one point, looked me in the eyes and said a heartfelt Thank you. He died on our shift.

leslie :-D · May 11, 2005

gosh,as a hospice nurse i have dozens of memorable stories/endings.

one of the most poignant is a female pt who had ca w/mets to her brain, bones, lungs. she was extremely confused.

her husband would faithfully visit qd and she did not recognize him.

a couple of weeks later, her husband was admitted as a hospice pt.

they were in different rooms and his was very aggressive and his time was ltd. he had these fungating wounds that were grossly infected and painful. he insisted on seeing his wife.

we put his wife on a stretcher and wheeled her in his room.

he told his wife that he'd be leaving soon and wanted her w/him.

she just stared into his eyes, not a word spoken but seemed to understand what he was saying.

he passed away that noc; the noc shift did not wake his wife up to tell her.

the next morning, she too, had passed. prior to her death, she hadn't shown any signs of an imminent death.

not one of us had thought this to be coincidental.

she understood what her dh had said and per his wish, she followed him shortly thereafter.

leslie

chocolate_eyes585 · May 11, 2005

I like this storie, i dont know for some reason it made my day. To me what it seems is that the man your mother was seeing was "Azreal or sometimes called Micheal" (these are the names of the angel of death) I know you stated that your mother was not a religous woman, however it seems that she was given the opportunity to accept eternal life with god on her death bed, as he told her "if you come with me you wont hurt anymore" When your mother called you in to give you a check for your birthday, it was her way of saying fare well to you, (she obviously accepted!!) I dont know how much faith you have personally, but this was my interpretation of your storie. When it was finally time for your mother to go, God saw your mothers HEART and felt that she was worthy to have everlasting life, in spirit, of course. When you ask; what should i make of it? My interpretaion is that your mother was exemplifiying to you; the truth in gods promise of living a Peaceful eternal life, nomatter who you are and where you have been, it is never to late to accept god into your heart.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*** this probably doesnt fit here, since its a personal experience, but I left it here anyway*** ( I can probably delete it if needed)
Ok, well, here goes.
m new here. I actually found this site when I was looking for "white nurses clogs". I googled that phrase and a journal from this site came up. ( Im going back to work soon, after being home for 4 yrs and am nervous about it, so while i was here, I posted in the OR section, if anyone has any tips, feel free to share them there on my thread. thanks)
Anyway, here goes
long story short, my mother was given 6 months (Ca).
she was NOT religious woman, in fact, she sort of made fun of people who were devout.
well, it had been 5 days since she was released from the hospital, to go home and etc.....
she wasnt ale to walk so she was in bed.
well, that day, she was very lucid and making perfect sense. I was waiting for a delivery (pain meds) from the pharmacy and worried that she would be in pain. she wasnt complaining. she was very clear headed. I was in the other room when she screamed for me to "get in here this minute". when I went into he room, she insisted that I "get rid of that man right now" (she was very angry. she went on to tell me that he refused to leave and she wouldnt have a strange man in her room. there was no one in there. she was sooo insistant and so clear headed that I actually thought that someone has maybe broken in, knowing we had strong pain meds in the house etc etc
well, this went on and on all day long, and each time that I went into her room, she was having a definate conversation with someone?? she actually seemed to be listenning and would stop and them respond "no, Im not going anywhere, I dont know you and you dont tell me what to do anyway"
I was actually getting scared because she seemd so insistent and coherant.
Ok, so the end of the day, she tells my sister that "this man here is telling me that if I go with him, I wont be in pain anymore" ( she had metastatic breast ca). then she calls me in and say to me, "here take this, its a check for your borthday and I want you to have it" (my birthday was the next day). that week she had been given 6 months and I told her that she could give it to me herself tomorrow.
So, went to bed.
when we went in her room the next morning, she was gone.
I am STILL trying to make sense of what went on that last day and I dont have an explanation.
Has anyone ever heard of anything like this happenning before?
I still dont know what to make of it.
thanks
LA
ps I am not crazy, cross my heart

PumpkinsMami · May 14, 2005

I've been a hospice nurse for 4 years. When I first started, I was a continuous care nurse. The pts great grandson was 4 or 5 yrs old. He would constantly come to her bed and talk to her. He would ask why she was sleeping and his mom & grandma would say that she was very sick & tired. When she finally passed, I truthfully thought he would have a difficult time and not understand. He would still run in and out of the room, but didn't say much. When the funeral home came to pick her up, he came running through the hallway, with a huge smile, calling out "THE ANGELS ARE COMING, THE ANGELS ARE COMING! GET OUT OF THE WAY." It was so touching.

At our hospice's memorial service almost a year later, this family attended and the pts dtr still became teary eyed over it and couldn't tell the story of her grandson! It's definitely one that I'll never forget!

pricklypear · May 14, 2005

LA - A similar thing happened to my mom when her mom died. It was in the late 40s, and my grandma was in the hospital. My mom was 16 at the time and her dad had died the year before. Anyway, my mom woke up in the middle of the night and found her mom sitting on her bed holding her hand. She said "Joan, you have to wake up." Then the phone rang, my mom got up to answer it. It was the hospital to tell her that her mom had unexpectedly died. I got goose bumps when she told me that story. She swears it wasn't a dream. She said she could feel the weight of someone sitting on the bed and feel her mom's hand.

The saddest thing I ever saw was a young man who had been in a terrible accident. He lived through surgery, but nobody knew if he would wake up. His mom sat by his bedside all night and called to him to wake up. I cried all night that night, listening to her pain. He never did wake up. A couple days later, after another surgery, they decided to let him go. I wasn't there (thank God) but I heard that she got in bed with him, and rocked him and sang while he died. I'm getting teary-eyed just thinking about it. I can handle expected death, like from illness. But I just can't deal with sudden things like that. :crying2:

sassynurse78 · May 14, 2005

Wow interesting thread! I too have had so many experiences that it is hard to narrow it down. They have went from scary (a little woman pleading for me not to leave her because three men were there to take her, she died 8 minutes later) to very peacefull. Although the scariest story I have ever heard, was long before I was a nurse. My aunt was the farthest thing from religious as you could ever imagine. She would say she believed in God, but just didn't give a d#@n about him! As she lay dying in the hospital she related the story that the old man across the hall died last night. Upon further questioning she related that no one had told her this but about 3 in the morning three men in black came to get him and he didn't want to go. A couple days later she related the woman down the hall had passed, three white figures came for her and she wanted to go. She related the three black figures came into her room and just looked at her and she knew she was next. She was. I do not know how much I think is 100% true in these cases, but there are enough of them that I do beleive that somehow the "other side" is close enough to veiw to people that are close to going to it. Has anyone else experienced the "death in 3's"? If not, it is regularly said around where I work that deaths always happen in "3's" and also the "3 little boys"? It is often considered important enough to pass on to the next shift if any of the pts. have reported seeing "3 little boys/kids"?

pricklypear · May 14, 2005

I've never heard of the 3 kids/little boys, but I KNOW deaths/codes happen in 3s!! Just like I know **** hits the fan on a full moon, and very soon after someone stupid says "gee, it's nice and quiet tonight!":rotfl:

rosemadder · May 15, 2005

I've never heard of the 3 kids/little boys, but I KNOW deaths/codes happen in 3s!! Just like I know **** hits the fan on a full moon, and very soon after someone stupid says "gee, it's nice and quiet tonight!":rotfl:

speaking of full moons...i'll never forget one day I was working and it was just crazy and I told one of the docs it's a full moon and he says but it's daylight...I rolled on the floor while I reminded him that it was still "up there"....LOL