Dealing with family complaints

[recentlycertified]

Here is the current issue I am dealing with as a recently certified nursing assistant. I accepted a job from a major company in a skilled nursing facility, it's a bit of a shady place when it comes to a lot of issues that are presently there. I've been seeing a lot of things going on, that shouldn't be going on, I've reported things, but not too much has been done. I've been looking for another job, but I as a new CNA, nothing offers me the good hours and the good pay I have at this job.

Anyways, we had a meeting last week about a family complaint. A family member said that a CNA was toileting, and changing her mother without using gloves. The meeting was just basically saying, that if there's ever a family member present, and you're going to provide care, ask them to leave because of the patients right to privacy, unless the patient says they can stay, and if that situation comes up, to always get someone else in the room as a witness. I said to myself, "that's a little bit gross, who changes someone's brief without using gloves?" Although where I work is a bit shady, I really honestly don't see someone not using gloves while changing a dirty brief.

Later that day my supervisor came up to me, and asked me where my gait belt was. When I was trained, the person that trained me, lifted someone without using a gait belt, and I asked her where her gait belt was, she said she never uses one, and she didn't know where to get one. She has worked there for two years. There's usually one down by the nurse's station, but that day I didn't grab it.

My supervisor says to me, "I swear to god if I get in trouble for you guys not doing your jobs correctly..." A patient was in the hallway, and she asked the patient if anyone ever put one of them on her. The patient said, "that goes on your foot, right?" which made me giggle because it pointed out to me my supervisor was clueless as to which patients were mentally functional and which ones weren't.

My supervisor goes on to say, she was putting a particular gait belt in the patient's room, so everyone knew to use that gait belt on her.

I said to myself, okay, well, when I went to school, I was taught how to use a gait belt, so I should do everything the way I was taught, but at the same time, the person that trained me, had worked there for two years, and didn't know where one was, so this issue in my opinion should have been fixed a long time ago, not when a family member complains, so they can cover themselves up.

Now, keep in mind the family members are a little bit demanding when it comes to how they want things, which is fine, because I can understand their frustration, of their mother being sick and all that.

We gave her a brand new chair to suit her needs, special cream to help her itchiness. We moved furniture over(there's two to a room) so they could have extra room, so they could put a chair beside the bed for them to sit down.

The other day, her family members were there, and I made it a point to tell them that I didn't want to bother them, so whenever they were ready to leave to let me know, so I could get her ready for bed, to avoid providing care while the family member was there.

She let me know her mother was ready for bed, and when I entered the room, they were complaining about her new wheelchair and how big it was, and asking why she needed that particular gait belt. I said, that if there were any questions to ask my supervisor. She than left, I gathered my supplies to prepare her for bed...and the gait belt had gone missing. I checked all her drawers, dressers, bathroom, even her roommates drawers and dressers. I notified my nurse, and wrote a letter to my supervisor.

I said to the patient, "where's your gait belt?"

she said, "what's that?"

I said, "you know that thing that I put around you when I pick you up?"

She said "My daughter took it."

I said, "where'd she put it?"

She said, "I don't know."

Weather or not her account of what she saw was correct or incorrect in unknown to me. But this is very frustrating, because I have a strange feeling, that this family member is trying to get me in trouble for whatever reason it is. I feel like she took it because she didn't want her mother to use it, after she made all these complaints.

I called the CNA who worked during the day shift to try and figure out at what time this gait belt went missing, I'm not trying to jump to conclusions. There was no response. But she obviously at some point during my shift, saw this gait belt.

Has anybody else had to deal with family members like this? Possibly trying to lye about nurse's or CNAs?

Can anybody tell me some personal experiences they went through, and how they handled it? Any responses would be great.

[fuzzywuzzy, CNA]

This is why you were told to have 2 people in the room at all times with this person. This has happened a handful of times in the 2 years I've been at my facility. This is no pleasing some people, whether they be a resident, patient, or family member- some will make accusations whether they are true or not. It's a pain in the neck, but the presence of a 2nd person who can vouch for you covers your butt. Some of these anxious, guilty, lawsuit-happy family members need to be out of the room when doing care because they make both you and the resident nervous and uncomfortable.

I personally would have refused to provide care at all until the gait belt suddenly materialized again. Then if it didn't, I would ask the nurse what she wants you to do, and you can bet I'd be telling the floor nurse and the charge nurse exactly what the resident said about her daughter taking the gait belt so they could document it and I'd also make a note myself in the CNA charts.

Another thing... you can buy gait belts at uniform stores or through catalogues. They're not expensive. Get one, put your name on it, and then you'll always have one.

[recentlycertified]

I definitely told the nurse, and my supervisor. I went out and I bought my own gait belt, my own manual blood pressure cuff, and thermometer, because theirs doesn't work.

Have you ever known someone who lost their license because a family member made a false accusation?

[KimberlyRN89, BSN, RN]

Have you ever known someone who lost their license because a family member made a false accusation?

I've known someone who lost their license b/c a coworker made a false accusation:mad: Look out for your license & your good name!

[fuzzywuzzy, CNA]

I've known someone who lost their license b/c a coworker made a false accusation

same.

At least the family members usually make it crystal clear to everyone that they're crazy!

[SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN]

Always have another aide with you when dealing with this family.

We have one totally insane family. We had a care planning meeting for their mother yesterday to which they came and I was never so grateful to my floor nurse as I was during that meeting. When they said that all of the residents on my wing stink of BO I went very thin-lipped and said, "I must disagree with that statement." K jumped right in and saved me from going all non-therapeutic on their collective butt.

[fuzzywuzzy, CNA]

You'll find that a lot of residents act totally different in the presence of family. Some of them are all "la dee da, whatever you want, dear" when the family is not around. Then the family shows up and as soon as you leave the room she's telling them how you picked out the wrong pajamas and you made her brush her teeth at the bedside when she really wanted to do it at the sink and all this other crap that you had NO IDEA was bothering her.

Then you'll have residents who are fine and then once their family is there they suddenly lose their ability to walk and feed themselves and they whimper in "pain" before you've even laid a hand on them and you look like a jerk.

And then there are those who are fine whether their family is there or not, but their families are the ones who wig out over everything... following you down the hall badgering you to attend to their mom, meanwhile "Mom" is sitting there rolling her eyes or getting all nervous because the daughter is standing there breathing down your both necks while you're trying to wash her crotch. And they want you do do EVERYTHING because you're "the girl" and "that's what the girl is for."

Oh and then there are the ones who don't ask you for anything but then they turn around and harass the nurses at the desk for stupid things that the nurses don't do like brief changes or HS care.

But then you get family members who come in and sit with their mother and feed her and they know and understand the fact that CNAs have assignments, so they make an effort to find their mom's CNA for the day when they need something, and they're so laid back, and they're nice to the roommate, and it's great.

[NurseCubanitaRN2b, BSN, RN]

Family members are the worst! You can never please them. If there's nothing to complain about they will find something to complain about. I came across a horrible daughter (her mothere was getting rehab) who would make a list of all the things that she wanted to complain for that day and then turn it in to the administrator at the end of the day. She was horrible, if she didn't like the sheets you had to change them, even if you had changed them earlier. Her mothers water pitcher needed to have adequate ice or else she'd make you change it. If her mother had BO she would make you shower her. Our solution for that one was that we would put antiperspurant anywhere she had folds and we'd be constantly putting perfumed lotion on her mom, we'd also put antiperspurant on her moms bed sheets and blankets, just so everything would smell good. She'd also make us take her mom to the restroom when she was fully incontinent. She was just a straight up witch from hell. Anyway when her mom died (sad, but we were all grateful) she wrote us a 3 page letter apologizing to us for how badgly she had treated us. She also went on to say that it took her mothers death to realize how well we really took care of her mom. She also said that her mom would always praise us, and would tell her to leave us alone, but she (the daughter) felt that we weren't doing enough and that's why she did the things she did. Anyway, it was a complete 180 degree turn with this woman. She even went out and bought the facility pizza and drinks for all three shifts (pretty expensive but the lady was loaded). I was just blown away. But you do meet all kinds.

[Poi Dog]

Concerned family members are one thing. Manipulative family members are on a different planet. I hope that your situation gets resolved and that admin do the right thing.

[KimberlyRN89, BSN, RN]

So a couple days ago, a family member tried to say he saw his father out on the street by our facility (our facility is on a very busy road!!). First of all, our facility is one that caters exclusively to those with dementia,meaning that its on lockdown @ all times. To enter you must have a code, and there is no way we would give it to a resident!! Secondly, the resident in question has successively escaped from previous facilities before and once DID figure out the code to get out, but the receptionist stopped him immediately and took him back to his room. Thirdly, the resident in question is VERY ill & has not left his room, period! And finally, since our facility does have people who are a high elopement risk, we perform hourly checks on each & every resident. If we cannot find a resident, we do room to room checks (and they usually turn up when we do this). If we still cannot find them (this has not happened since I've been there though), we lock the facility down, close all the doors, alert the nurse on duty & call the cops.

Our executive director, the caregivers who worked in that section, the nurses and other managers all had to go back through records, files & speak to everyone who was working that weekend when it allegedly happened. It was really upsetting for the girl who worked that weekend, because she assumed that the family was really nice. Turns out the son was just making it up, so he could claim that we were not taking care of his father & try to sue the company (did I mention the son is a lawyer?!). Some people are just plain shady:banghead:

[SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN]

Document, document, document!

State dinged us on an elopement. No harm, but they didn't like our investigation or care-planning.

[NurseCubanitaRN2b, BSN, RN]

You will find all kinds. The worse ones are the family members who are nurses or CNAs. I remember a long time ago I had family member who threw it in our faces that she was in nursing school. My reply when she told me was "That's great, and when you're in our situation you will see things a whole lot differently" and she said to me "I said I'm in nursing school, not in CNA school." I told her "It doesn't matter whether it's CNA, RN, or LVN. You a nurse can do whatever the CNA can do." She was complaining about not taking her grandma to the toilet in time (she was incontinent by the way). She just wanted something to complain about and wanted to push some buttons. Last I heard she's a LVN in one of the nursing homes and has failed out of 2 RN schools. Tsk Tsk