Dating classmates?

That Guy, BSN, RN, EMT-B · Jun 7, 2010

I would advise against it. I am stuck in class with my ex of two years and oh man she made sure to make my life hell in every way possible even though she is the one who ended us by cheating on me. Make sure it doesnt distract you, it is not worth it sometimes.

TheSquire, DNP, APRN, NP · Jun 8, 2010

Cons:
- Good chance of not wanting to listen to more nursing stuff after your shift
- "Busy" might actually be the case, and relationships are distracting
- Better chance of finding someone who is uptight, competitive, and controlling
- M/F ratio means anything you do will be gossiped about. So if you mess up with one girl, it might mark you to the rest.
- Might have to work with an Ex
- Overexposure from class time.
Seems like a toss-up.

The bolded reason is the one which caused me to decide that this was a bad idea. Consider for a moment what happens when a break-up occurs: your new ex-gf goes and complains about you to her friends (no matter whether or not you were at fault) and they all are socially obligated to hate you. This means that a good chunk of your cohort will be required to hate you for a long period of time - which is awkwardness and drama you don't need. As guys we tend to get a pass on the drama that a certain subset of our female classmates seem to revel in - dating (and then breaking up with) a classmate offers those people an open invitation to suck you in.

If you do decide to date a classmate, do so near the end of your program - that way, if/when you do break up, it'll be after graduation when the social consequences will be easier to minimize and won't impact your studies as much.

Mike A. Fungin RN · Jun 8, 2010

I dated a couple classmates during nursing school with mixed results.

The first cheated on me and then badmouthed me to some of our peers. I guess that was kind of lousy, but to be honest I couldn't have cared less what they thought.

I dated some non-nursing people after that for a year or so and then got together with a second classmate, and... well... we're getting married in June.

So... I guess what I'm saying is it can be hit or miss.

CareteamRN70 · Jun 8, 2010

Not a problem for me, Im married. And if that wasn't enough, most of th egirls in my class are young enough to be my daughters (and depending on how loose their mother's morals were in the early 80's they just might be :devil: "

But We do have one other younger guy in class and i see him fumble about trying to get in with one girl or another, and it's abit amusing because all the girls do talk about it to one another and since I am the "old" man, they normally talk around me paying me no mind. In short..If you're gonna do it I wouldn't date a classmate in your class, look a year above or below ya.

Semper Fi (and ya that includes me wife as well)

Birry · Jun 8, 2010

Is this a good idea?
From what I can see,
Pros:
- Always have something to talk about
- Using "busy" as an excuse has an actual chance of working
- Better chance of finding someone who is smart and will be financially independent
- M/F Ratio
- Physical assessments can suddenly be very fun
Cons:
- Good chance of not wanting to listen to more nursing stuff after your shift
- "Busy" might actually be the case, and relationships are distracting
- Better chance of finding someone who is uptight, competitive, and controlling
- M/F ratio means anything you do will be gossiped about. So if you mess up with one girl, it might mark you to the rest.
- Might have to work with an Ex
- Overexposure from class time.
Seems like a toss-up.

If that's the case, then just make sure you pick a winner.

And not ALL of them are bound to hate you. Chances are, some in the cohort may not like your new ex very much, and those women just might be there to console you. :coollook:

Then, of course, only looking in the School of Nursing seems pretty narrow. Why focus on my cohort of 60 people, when there are about 14,000 female students at my school? I think I'd rather date a dance major, anyway...

AragornSkywalker · Jun 8, 2010

Mostly laziness on my part.

I'm not saying these are my only options, just whether or not is it a good one.

puravidaLV · Jun 8, 2010

Never pee in the company pool, but since it has a finite end might as well make it a doctor =d

Bob_N_VA · Jun 9, 2010

Its a very bad idea. Way too small a pond to be fishing out of. They will talk and it won't be good. Just hold on till you graduate, then you will be in a target rich environment but without as much gossip.

AragornSkywalker · Jun 10, 2010

Thx for the advice.

Bummer.

Streamline2010 · Jul 7, 2010

Better chance of finding someone who is uptight, competitive, and controlling

Okay, explain that one, Men. Just why is a female nursing student "uptight, competitive, and controlling, " and you male students are not. Come on, defend your words, here.

No matter what the career field, you will find that the competent women are every bit as intelligent, strategical, and aggressively career-oriented as the men. If they were not, they would not be good employees. Non-competitive students usually do not finish nursing programs. If you want a GD yes-woman-housewife, marry a dependent mommy with a G.E.D. education who works at the local grocery store for min wage. She ought to be non-competitive enough to suit you.

In case you had a hausfrau for a mom, let me tell you: Working women do not want to coddle you the way your Momma did. You are expected to pull your weight, and be a team member. When I was married, I didn't waste one iota of time on any non-paid housework that I didn't have to do. If you think women are "uptight, competitive, and controlling," maybe the problem is that YOU still expect to be BABIED and CARRIED! An equal partner will not play second fiddle to a boyfriend or husband. She has her own goals and schedule to keep. Grow up, boys.

RossayRN · Jul 7, 2010

I have 2 good friends from nursing school. We all just graduated, and I found out that they have been dating for 2 years and no one knew. It's your business who you date, just keep it that way.