CPR - AED- lost my first patient today.

Sorry for your loss. I am sure the team did everything they could for the patient. Hope you find some peace this evening.

I'm so sorry! Let yourself grieve, but don't obsess. This too is part of nursing - not everyone makes it. Use your support systems to deal with this experience and let it make you a better nurse.

I'm starting to calm down now.. adrenaline worn off.. I am so upset over this. Had to perform CPR on a patient this am. She was doing so good! I'm thinking Sudden Cardiac Arrest.. not sure. Maybe PE first. I'm just so upset now.

The first code is definetly horrible. The one that stuck with me, well even to today I can close my eyes and see it. Long story short, I was working as an LPN while finishing RN school on a busy med surg unit.

Pt was a 50 yr old with severe Downs. Sweetest guy I think I'd had in a LONG time. Had colectomy and was 6 days post op. Tol po without problems. On RA, and had been wearing TEDS and SCDS. Had been amb. with PT, and we had orders to ambulate since it was a Sunday.

I checked a SaO2 and it was great. Amb while sat monitor was still on, never dropped AT ALL. He wanted a coke so I let him walk with me and sat by the Coke machine while I got some change for him.

In a few seconds, he went apneic, started to seize and hit the floor. We called a code blue and the Pulm. doc showed up. Never got a sign of life, no nothing. After he called it, he asked me in front of approx 30 staff members, "Now how do u think his mama will feel when I tell her that u killed her son???"

Anne, RNC

If someone told me that, it just might traumatize me forever. I'm so sorry he said that to you

OMG, I can't believe that doctor told you that! What a horrible, horrible thing to tell a nurse especially in front of peers after such a traumatic event! I'm sure that has stuck with you over theyears. I hope that this remark was reported to your supervisor and to his boss to impart guilt like that when in reality, you were following doctors orders by ambulating and pat was sitting down.

I have a feeling even if he were in bed, he would have gone apneic especially if his sats were fine. How insenstive!

After he called it, he asked me in front of approx 30 staff members, "Now how do u think his mama will feel when I tell her that u killed her son???"

How in any way, shape or form did you kill the patient?

Of course that it is a terrible thing for someone to say, but also so insane that it's hard to take it seriously.