CPR - AED- lost my first patient today.

VICEDRN, BSN, RN · Feb 24, 2012

Sorry for your loss. I am sure the team did everything they could for the patient. Hope you find some peace this evening.

Kittypower123, BSN, RN · Feb 24, 2012

I'm so sorry! Let yourself grieve, but don't obsess. This too is part of nursing - not everyone makes it. Use your support systems to deal with this experience and let it make you a better nurse.

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Feb 25, 2012

The first code is the worst. It's when we learn that performing CPR on a real human being is a lot harder than pushing on the chest of a Resusci-Annie, and in the long term, not much more successful. We all go through it at some point in our careers, but I don't think any of us ever forgets the first patient we lose. You will analyze it for a little while, and probably do some grieving.....that's OK. Just know that there will be others, and that you'll be there for them, fighting the battle against death.....and sometimes, you'll even win one.

Gentle thoughts and hugs to you. :hug:

sissiesmama, ASN, RN · Feb 25, 2012

I'm starting to calm down now.. adrenaline worn off.. I am so upset over this. Had to perform CPR on a patient this am. She was doing so good! I'm thinking Sudden Cardiac Arrest.. not sure. Maybe PE first. I'm just so upset now.
The first code is definetly horrible. The one that stuck with me, well even to today I can close my eyes and see it. Long story short, I was working as an LPN while finishing RN school on a busy med surg unit.
Pt was a 50 yr old with severe Downs. Sweetest guy I think I'd had in a LONG time. Had colectomy and was 6 days post op. Tol po without problems. On RA, and had been wearing TEDS and SCDS. Had been amb. with PT, and we had orders to ambulate since it was a Sunday.
I checked a SaO2 and it was great. Amb while sat monitor was still on, never dropped AT ALL. He wanted a coke so I let him walk with me and sat by the Coke machine while I got some change for him.
In a few seconds, he went apneic, started to seize and hit the floor. We called a code blue and the Pulm. doc showed up. Never got a sign of life, no nothing. After he called it, he asked me in front of approx 30 staff members, "Now how do u think his mama will feel when I tell her that u killed her son???"
Anne, RNC

allnurses Guide · Feb 25, 2012

Anne, that is a disgusting thing for that doctor to have said to you. I am so sorry.

beckster_01, BSN, RN · Feb 25, 2012

If someone told me that, it just might traumatize me forever. I'm so sorry he said that to you

NewGoalRN · Feb 25, 2012

OMG, I can't believe that doctor told you that! What a horrible, horrible thing to tell a nurse especially in front of peers after such a traumatic event! I'm sure that has stuck with you over theyears. I hope that this remark was reported to your supervisor and to his boss to impart guilt like that when in reality, you were following doctors orders by ambulating and pat was sitting down.

I have a feeling even if he were in bed, he would have gone apneic especially if his sats were fine. How insenstive!

MN-Nurse, ASN, RN · Feb 25, 2012

After he called it, he asked me in front of approx 30 staff members, "Now how do u think his mama will feel when I tell her that u killed her son???"
How in any way, shape or form did you kill the patient?
Of course that it is a terrible thing for someone to say, but also so insane that it's hard to take it seriously.