Cover Letter

Been there,done that, ASN, RN · Apr 4, 2014

A little wordy.. think about these...

- I am responding to your need for a progressive cardiac care unit R.N.

-I am a good fit for the unit as I have ( describe the exact skills they are asking for,that match your experience). I will graduate RN-BSN program at xxxxxx in June 2014 with 4.0 GPA.

- Here is the place to describe WHY you want to work at xx facility. Include a brief statement that mirrors their mission statement.

-YOUR interests are not what they want to hear... they want to hear what YOU can do for them.

-The last paragraph is pretty good, requesting a follow up.

- Don't forget the spell check. you have a couple of typos that would be unacceptable in a cover letter.

Wishing you much luck! Let us know how it goes!

-

nurseprnRN, BSN, RN · Apr 4, 2014

You don't graduate a program, you graduate from a program. The program graduates students. I know the "I will graduate ABC College in June" is trendy and sounds vaguely sophisticated, but it's wrong.

If it's in your attached resume, you don't have to pad your cover letter with it.

Much of this can be much more profitably discussed in your interview, because, frankly, everybody says she has passion, wants to work in a professional fast-paced (note, this word is properly hyphenated) unit, thinks good nursing care is the sun/moon/stars and every patient deserves it, blah, , blah. I am not trying to be negative, but nothing here makes me say, "Gosh, this one's different."

Your assessment of your awesomeness and fit for this position may or may not reflect reality; the HR people don't take such assertions at face value, nor do they appreciate being told that you know something better than they do about selecting candidates. Don't tell them to call you-- tell them you will call them on (Monday morning, or Tuesday afternoon, or whatever) to make an appointment.

Quite a few typos, misspellings, missing letters, etc. Not calculated to convince them that you will be good in a detail-oriented, fast-paced, complex environment.

nataliya86 · Apr 7, 2014

Thanks a lot for your comments. Here is the revised cover letter if you can comment on it that would be awesome. This job description doesn't ask for any specific skills. So, I went over their mission, vision, and values as well as qualities that they are looking for.

I am responding to your need for a progressive cardiac care unit R.N. for Versant RN Residency.

I am a good fit for the unit as my values, work ethic, and passion together with critical thinking and teamwork skills will add to the exceptional quality and compassionate care toward patients. I will graduate from RN-BSN program at xxxxxx in June 2014 with 4.0 GPA.

I wish to work for xxxxx Medical Center because I want to provide medical excellence to the ever-changing health care needs of our community every day. It will be a pleasure to add to the exceptional quality that is already evident in this organization.

I feel my integrity, compassion, accountability, respect, and excellence, as well as my excitement for becoming a progressive cardiac nurse would make me an ideal candidate for your department. I have applied online through your facility's website, but would appreciate the opportunity to discuss a position in your department in person. Please contact me via phone or email to arrange a mutually convenient time and date for us to meet.

allnurses Guide · Apr 7, 2014

I use a very simple cover letter template for every cover letter I write. This is it:

First paragraph - summarize what they are asking for in their ad. All resumes these days go through a computerized filter when submitted and only those that hit on their key words actually get sent on to HR for a live person review. This is where you echo back to them what you read they are looking for, using many of their own words. BE SPECIFIC. This also tells them you actually read and understood their needs. Very important. Three or four sentences max.

Second paragraph - tell how you meet their needs outlined in the above paragraph. Again, use their own phrasing within your sentences. Three to five sentences, max.

Third paragraph - Ask for/express desire for an interview. State plainly you believe you have the qualifications to meet their needs (it will have been outlined above that this is a true statement). Say the opportunity is exciting to you. Invite them to contact you to discuss your qualifications further. Three to four sentences max.

And that is IT.. Don't get flowery. Don't get wordy. Plain language, that you understand what their needs are, that you possess those qualities and here is a brief synopsis of how, that you are interested in interviewing. Attach your resume, where they get more details and then in the interview you will have the chance to tell your story, show your emotion, talk about the company. It is all about baiting the hook and getting them to bite.

You have about 30 seconds of this person's time, if that much. If you are wordy, they won't read the entire letter. Its a turn off. Both of your letters above are too flowery and too wordy. I was compelled only to scan it due to wordiness and floweriness and then just stopped reading due to a lack of interest. Three paragraphs, no more, no less, no more than 3-5 sentences per paragraph. You will get the chance to express your passion in the interview. Stating once that you are passionate/compassionate/caring/blahblahblah is ok. Stating it over and over and over is tedious. They don't care about that. They want to know what YOU are going to do for THEM. Don't expect them to read between the lines. If they have to do that, they just stop reading. They have no reason in these economic times to spend that kind of time on you.

You do not get nearly specific enough in your letter and you talk too much about things that are not measurable. You need more facts, less flowers. You get your facts from their ad - they are telling you exactly what they want to know. Don't reinvent the wheel, just tell them in their own words, succinctly and professionally, exactly what they want to know - whether you are a good fit and a brief synopsis of how. Even new grad positions have a list in them of what they are looking for.

When it comes to cover letters, all they want to know is if you meet the basic criteria. You can't reel them in with a cover letter, all you can do is bait the hook. The bite is the interview offer. The interview itself is where you reel them in.

This template has served me well all my life, to the point that I am almost reluctant to share it I get a lot of interviews and a lot of offers.

Hope this helps.

hanoi98 · Apr 7, 2014

Very helpful. Thank you!!!

joanna73, BSN, RN · Apr 8, 2014

Your cover letter should not be more than 3 concise paragraphs and a closing sentence. Managers do not have time to read lengthy cover letters.

Remove all the stuff pertaining to having compassion, etc, etc....that tells managers nothing of value, as Green Tea says. Instead, choose two or three attributes from that organization's mission or value statements and highlight examples of how you can meet their needs.

vsheehan · Mar 27, 2018

Could you post an example

vsheehan · Mar 27, 2018

I use a very simple cover letter template for every cover letter I write. This is it:
First paragraph - summarize what they are asking for in their ad. All resumes these days go through a computerized filter when submitted and only those that hit on their key words actually get sent on to HR for a live person review. This is where you echo back to them what you read they are looking for, using many of their own words. BE SPECIFIC. This also tells them you actually read and understood their needs. Very important. Three or four sentences max.
Second paragraph - tell how you meet their needs outlined in the above paragraph. Again, use their own phrasing within your sentences. Three to five sentences, max.
Third paragraph - Ask for/express desire for an interview. State plainly you believe you have the qualifications to meet their needs (it will have been outlined above that this is a true statement). Say the opportunity is exciting to you. Invite them to contact you to discuss your qualifications further. Three to four sentences max.
And that is IT.. Don't get flowery. Don't get wordy. Plain language, that you understand what their needs are, that you possess those qualities and here is a brief synopsis of how, that you are interested in interviewing. Attach your resume, where they get more details and then in the interview you will have the chance to tell your story, show your emotion, talk about the company. It is all about baiting the hook and getting them to bite.
You have about 30 seconds of this person's time, if that much. If you are wordy, they won't read the entire letter. Its a turn off. Both of your letters above are too flowery and too wordy. I was compelled only to scan it due to wordiness and floweriness and then just stopped reading due to a lack of interest. Three paragraphs, no more, no less, no more than 3-5 sentences per paragraph. You will get the chance to express your passion in the interview. Stating once that you are passionate/compassionate/caring/blahblahblah is ok. Stating it over and over and over is tedious. They don't care about that. They want to know what YOU are going to do for THEM. Don't expect them to read between the lines. If they have to do that, they just stop reading. They have no reason in these economic times to spend that kind of time on you.
You do not get nearly specific enough in your letter and you talk too much about things that are not measurable. You need more facts, less flowers. You get your facts from their ad - they are telling you exactly what they want to know. Don't reinvent the wheel, just tell them in their own words, succinctly and professionally, exactly what they want to know - whether you are a good fit and a brief synopsis of how. Even new grad positions have a list in them of what they are looking for.
When it comes to cover letters, all they want to know is if you meet the basic criteria. You can't reel them in with a cover letter, all you can do is bait the hook. The bite is the interview offer. The interview itself is where you reel them in.
This template has served me well all my life, to the point that I am almost reluctant to share it I get a lot of interviews and a lot of offers.
Hope this helps.

Could you post an old cover letter of yours as an example?