College & Motherhood

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I do not know how I am going to balance this? My children are 3 1/2 and 8 months old.

I registered for a online Math & online Humanities class for Spring 2008. One week into the semester I have already had to drop my courses - I have no time to read / study or do assignments! Everytime I would sit down to do some homework, I was interrupted. Of course my children come first - but I was hoping to have a few hours to myself during the day to study. My husband is gone most of the day so that is not an option. I work 12 hour shifts on the weekends. At this time online is the only way. Should I wait until I can actually attend on campus so that I have that time just for me?

Advice needed, I may try this again in Summer or Fall 2008

How do you do it with little ones?;)

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Unfortunately, I have NO advice specific to your question of doing online college, but what I'm trying to do at the moment, is listen to podcasts (iTunes U) to get started on my studies. Next year I hope to attend a CNA evening program, get a better job, and then prepare for nursing school. I can't do it this year (my husband's planning a return to night school in two months, and my little one was just prov dx'd with ASD), so I'm hoping to use my time 'creatively' this year to listen to podcasts so I don't have to learn everything at once.

Listening on an iPod, I can listen "wherever" -- taking notes is a challenge. My children are 9yo and almost 3yo, and my 3yo is my special needs kid, but my 9yo is my high-energy sensory kid. I also work freelance from home, so with home/job/kids/husband, something is always going on, and 'quiet time' does not exist here.

I sympathize with your situation ....... do you have extended family who could help? A local reliable teenager who could help with babysitting? A group of other mom students that maybe you could each take an hour to watch each other's kids while each of you studies?

Otherwise ... if you can put school off until another time when you might have more options, and maybe listen to podcasts or start your studies gradually on your own -- so it's not 'all at once' and not in the pressure cooker of college just yet. (That's the road I am taking, but it's not for everyone.)

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I am not trying to be a wet blanket here but if you don't have time to study the simpler subjects like math and Humanities I am not sure how you plan to have time for the Core nursing, which requires much more time, to study.

All I can say is you have to get your ideas and priorities straight. I have teens so they are fairly self-sufficient, but a friend of mine in class has 6 kids, of which are 2 sets of twins. ALL her kids are under 12 years old. She works part-time and makes time to study. She doesn't get to spend as much time as she would like with her kids but for now, 18 months, she is sacrificing that so that she can get through school and she will then be able to spend more time with them, only having to work a 3 day work week.

If you want this badly enough you have to find a way to make it work and to get assistance from others to help you make it happen. If that isn't the case then maybe you will have to postpone school until your children are in school or at least older so that they don't require quite as much individualized attention.

Yes, it is hard as a mom to tell your kids you can't be with them for certain things, but it is temporary, you aren't going to be in school forever.

GOOD LUCK

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Hello. We are in the same boat here. My son is 2, and I am taking 18 hours (all on-line!) Really the only way I manage is to do stuff while he is napping and at night after he is in bed. He also goes to a Mothers Day Out program once a week . It is on Fridays from 8-1, and that gives me a good block of time to get stuff done. Maybe you should look into something like that? Anyways, good luck- you can do this!!!

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Specializes in ICU.

It can be done. At the beginning of last semester my children were 8, 3 and 9 months. My husband works weekdays, I work weekends. I I took 16 credit hours (3 classes on campus, 3 online) and finished the semester with a 4.0. I worked my butt off bigtime, but it CAN be done. I work when they are napping. I work when they are playing at my feet, sitting on my lap, eating....whenever I could find a minute. Set your mind to it and do it. It is for all of you in the long run.

Kim

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You can do it if you put your mind to it. Take some of the suggestions offered, such as seeking the help of family, friends, hiring babysitters, starting a mommy study group. If you have to, get up at 3am to study. Look at it this way. If your husband suddenly left you, or God forbid, something happened to him you would be facing life alone with the children. You would have to cope. Just look at this as something you have to figure out. Yes, you can postpone it. That might be your best option. But many mothers who postpone their plans until the children are older find that they don't get back to their original plans. You just have to think it over, pick the choices that you think will work for you and begin. If you have to take one course at a time, you will still be making progress, so figure it out and get started. Good luck.

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I too had this problem. I had to realize that my kids are going to be kids and I had to learn how to utilize my time wisely. I was reading while cooking, doing laundry, in the bathroon, etc... whatever I had to do, I did it. I have a 5yo and a 1yo and hubby is an over the road truckdriver. Figure out what works for you no matter what it is and things will work out for you!!;)

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Specializes in Rehab, CICU, ICU Pulmonary, ER, OB.

I am with you. I have 3 girls ages 7, almost 5 and 8 months. I have been in school along time and life just keeps getting in the 'way'. My advice (which I am following too) just do it. If it's what you want...DO IT. I have made excuses and this and that, but if you want it you will do it. As for online classes, stay up for an hour each night after the kids go to bed to study. Trust me, the dishes and laundry will be waiting for you!

Good luck!

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Hello!! I am in the same boat with you....My kids are 11 yrs, 3 1/2 yrs and 7 months. My husband works out of town ALL THE TIME.... he is maybe home 1 day out of 7. I am taking 4 classes online reg. curriculum...Med TERMS 1 & 2 ONLINE this semester and I am also taking the Medication Aide course at a local college on Saturdays. It is hard sometimes when the 3 yr old is running around and getting into everything and the baby is crying but somehow I manage to stay on task with my classes. Like the old saying goes"Where there's a will there's a way" and you just have to figure out what works for you. I will tell you right now it will not be EASY but it will be well worth it in the end.;)

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I do not know how I am going to balance this? My children are 3 1/2 and 8 months old.

How do you do it with little ones?;)

This is how I did it (taking prereqs). I went to school 2 to 4 days a week and had my 2 year old in daycare the whole day on those school days even though I would have 2 to 4 hours free from class. Those hours were completely devoted to study in the quiet college library. For studying at home when writing I'd put her in the highchair and give her a pen and paper so she could feel "cool" writing like mommy. I study when she naps and at night. If it were impossible to study at home I'd have my hubby watch her at night and go to a library or coffee shop.

I got all A's and found sometimes I even had some free time but that is after I learned to better organize my life. List your priorities. During exam times my house was messy but hey I'd rather get a better score. You can do it!! My hubby and I don't have any family here so we had to do daycare and we make just barely too much to qualify for the free daycare at the college.

Go now to school cause the time will pass regardless if you go or not and wouldn't you rather have a degree and job in your desired field? Don't worry about your kids not seeing you all of the time, they'll be happy if you spend quality time with them vs quantity.:innerconf

Good luck to you.

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Specializes in Tele Step Down, Oncology, ICU, Med/Surg.

You can do it! I started back at school with a 1, 6 and 9 year old. I used the community college day care and attended classes. I studied by putting out a ton of snacks on a beach blanket in front of the TV and locking myself in the laundry room and telling the kids to leave me alone unless they were bleeding or not breathing. Of course, this would make me feel guilty, so I would come out every 15 minutes to play with them and do something educational. Your kids may be too young yet but doing GE online should be doable. I took it slow--one prereq at a time--four years later and I'm finally in nursing school.

Good luck!

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If your 8 month old isn't going to bed at a decent hour, you might want to wait a few months. I worked hard to get my kids (3 and 8) in bed by 8:00 and do most of my studying at that time. Some times if I'm not too burnt out, I'll get up a little early in the morning before they get up and study then too.

The only time I really have trouble finding a few minutes to study is when my Mom-in-law comes to visit. She feels she has to constantly "check" on me and doesn't alway go to bed as easily as my kids. :icon_roll

Remember to tell your hubby you need time to study. Maybe he can help with some of the bedtime stuff.

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