Boy, Do I Feel Stupid!

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Specializes in Neonatal ICU (Cardiothoracic).

Hi all,

Well, last time I posted, it was to follow my dream of working in the ER. HA! After a few posts of how excited I was, and some of the interesting things I'd seen, I'm back, feeling a little sheepish at the moment. I wrote a letter to the director of the Women's/Children's division at my hospital last weekend practically begging her to hire me back into NICU. Gosh...I made a terrible mistake. Once out of the NICU, I realized how much I had invested and learned there, and how much I really missed my babies. Don't get me wrong... ER is sure fast paced, and ours is one of the best in the country, but once I spent a few weeks on orientation, and saw truly how frenzied the pace is, how hateful and irresponsible the patients can be, and how you're expected to provide basic "patch 'em up" care and move them out, before getting another pt in, I realized I wanted to go back to NICU. So.....the W&C director is going to try and get me back in.....there is a policy that says I can't change jobs more than once in 12 months, but I'm not off orientation yet, an d they wouldn't have to orient me. I've pretty much forfeited my NICU day shift, seniority, etc. But at this point it doesn't matter. Am I a horrible person for wanting this, and leaving the ER so soon?

SteveRN21

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Specializes in Maternal - Child Health.
Hi all,

Well, last time I posted, it was to follow my dream of working in the ER. HA! After a few posts of how excited I was, and some of the interesting things I'd seen, I'm back, feeling a little sheepish at the moment. I wrote a letter to the director of the Women's/Children's division at my hospital last weekend practically begging her to hire me back into NICU. Gosh...I made a terrible mistake. Once out of the NICU, I realized how much I had invested and learned there, and how much I really missed my babies. Don't get me wrong... ER is sure fast paced, and ours is one of the best in the country, but once I spent a few weeks on orientation, and saw truly how frenzied the pace is, how hateful and irresponsible the patients can be, and how you're expected to provide basic "patch 'em up" care and move them out, before getting another pt in, I realized I wanted to go back to NICU. So.....the W&C director is going to try and get me back in.....there is a policy that says I can't change jobs more than once in 12 months, but I'm not off orientation yet, an d they wouldn't have to orient me. I've pretty much forfeited my NICU day shift, seniority, etc. But at this point it doesn't matter. Am I a horrible person for wanting this, and leaving the ER so soon?

Hi Steve,

Welcome back!

It's great to hear you reinforce what so many of us sometimes doubt about our love of the NICU.

I had a brief period of "doubt" about 5 years into my NICU career, thinking that I was "losing" my hard-earned adult-care skills. But I was realistic enough to realize that I didn't want to venture too far from my NICU home, so I went to work in an LDRP unit. It was a great learning experience, and I wouldn't trade it for anything, but I also returned to the NICU. For some of us, it is just in our blood!

I thank my lucky stars everyday that there are skilled and dedicated adult-care nurses who do the work that I could never do, so that I am freed up to work where I love!

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The better you know. Now you'll have no regrets.

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The better you know. Now you'll have no regrets.

:yeahthat:

Now you won't be wondering the rest of your life about what it would be like to work in ER. There won't be those nagging regrets, and I know that you've gained a new appreciation for NICU. Welcome back! :)

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I guess the grass is always greener on the other side, huh? It can be easy to lose sight of how good we have it in the NICU - nice ratios, no drunk MVA pts complaining about their C-collars, the list goes on.

I'm glad you're thinking about going back to neo FT. Seemed like you were good at it and I enjoyed reading your contributions here.

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Specializes in Neonatal ICU (Cardiothoracic).

Yeah, the grass did seem greener. I hope I can escape the ED with a shred of dignity. We really do have it great in NICU. We have innocent patients that truly need us, don't cuss us out or push call buttons. I never realized how much I loved it and took it for granted until I was "out of the loop" so to speak. I only hope I'm not stuck for the next year in the ED. Either way I'm going for my NNP next year......

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We really do have it great in NICU. We have innocent patients that truly need us, don't cuss us out or push call buttons.

Yeah, and the poop and throw up is much smaller.:uhoh21:

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Specializes in Nurse Scientist-Research.

I made an opposite journey going from adults to babies. I do miss some of the conversations I had with patients and having the patients themselves verbally thank you but that's scraping for something because overall I am thrilled to be working with infants overall. I do not miss the mind games, manipulations and fakery. I know parents can have their special challenges but it's just not the same.

All that to say; I think your side trip to ER nursing will be an invaluable experience to you if for no other reason than to appreciate the job you are in now. There is a special fit for everyone and I think everyone should explore to find the best fit. I think I appreciate where I am more than those who have never been out of the NICU due to my previous experience.

And welcome back!

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Don't feel stupid at all, it never hurts to try something different, and if that something just isn't for you take it as a learning experience. I was considering leaving NICU for the ER myself--to expand on my skills, try a different kind of nursing etc....then realized I would honestly miss the babies too much-- Its not all roses of course but it can be so rewarding and challenging (which I love). Don't be so hard on yourself :rolleyes:

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