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BON and alleged verbal abuse via pt

Nurses   (4,380 Views 83 Comments)
by Beldar_the_Cenobite Beldar_the_Cenobite (Platinum*) Platinum*

Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

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3 hours ago, NurseBlaq said:

Wow! Is there a financial issue? Why not sell one vehicle and use the money for housing? And why park both at your place of employment? There's a lot going on with Beldar huh?

because one IS housing, and the other is transport.

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1 hour ago, morte said:

because one IS housing, and the other is transport.

I got that but it still means one should be sold and more suitable housing obtained. You can't live out of a van. He has a job. Older motels allow people to reside in them all the time. Has he checked into public housing?

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not.done.yet has 8 years experience as a MSN, RN and works as a Professional Development Specialist.

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14 minutes ago, NurseBlaq said:

I got that but it still means one should be sold and more suitable housing obtained. You can't live out of a van. He has a job. Older motels allow people to reside in them all the time. Has he checked into public housing?

Beldar has taken all these types of potentials into consideration when making the choice to live out of his van. It isn't an unreasonable thing to do in and of itself. What he struggles with is the idea that he doesn't have the right to park the van overnight on private property.

I don't think the mention of his prior issues is "snark" to be honest. I think it is likely he has burned many bridges with this employer, if his posts here that mention race, counting other people's money and his general bitterness about his life are anything to go by. It isn't snarky to point this out.

I am not surprised something like the original post has now happened. I suspect, Beldar, that you just aren't a very kind individual at this point in your life. Unhappiness in life tends to show itself whether we mean for it to or not.

Good luck with the investigation. They should not be asking anyone to move a 400+ lb person with only two people to do it. That being said, nobody should be discussing it so bluntly in front of the patient as to embarrass or offend them. A simple "It will be safer for everyone if we get another pair of hands in here" would suffice. Calling out multiple times how many people needed to move the patient wasn't terribly sensitive. If the facility has been looking for a reason to get rid of you, you just flung the door wide open. A four page "explanation" wasn't warranted and likely will come across as a diatribe instead. I would start looking for another job.

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37 minutes ago, not.done.yet said:

Beldar has taken all these types of potentials into consideration when making the choice to live out of his van. It isn't an unreasonable thing to do in and of itself. What he struggles with is the idea that he doesn't have the right to park the van overnight on private property.

I don't think the mention of his prior issues is "snark" to be honest. I think it is likely he has burned many bridges with this employer, if his posts here that mention race, counting other people's money and his general bitterness about his life are anything to go by. It isn't snarky to point this out.

I am not surprised something like the original post has now happened. I suspect, Beldar, that you just aren't a very kind individual at this point in your life. Unhappiness in life tends to show itself whether we mean for it to or not.

 

Well I'm unfamiliar with Beldar or I've been missing his posts, or not paying enough attention. This is my first time actually noticing a pattern and it's because others have pointed it out.

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not.done.yet has 8 years experience as a MSN, RN and works as a Professional Development Specialist.

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Just now, NurseBlaq said:

Well I'm unfamiliar with Beldar or I've been missing his posts, or not paying enough attention. This is my first time actually noticing a pattern and it's because others have pointed it out.

You can click on any poster's name to see their posting history, if you are curious and want the whole picture.

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CapeCodMermaid has 30+ years experience and works as a DNS.

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To the person who said "you shouldn't have apologized", I disagree. If the patient was offended whether you purposely offended her or she took something you said in the wrong way, apologizing is the thing to do. Read the book by the malpractice attorney-I can't remember the title- but he is quite convincing that the number of malpractice suits goes down in the patient gets an apology.

I had a patient accuse me of being rude and saying "I don't want her on my floor." What I said was, "I don't want her on THE floor." She had already fallen 4 times in less than 2 weeks. I was very direct with her and repeated what I said. I said I was sorry if she misunderstood. She was fine and all was well.

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Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

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If it goes up to the Ombudsman, can the ombudsman be forgiving with my certification or are they just out right not for employees? Will she ask about my side of the story and if I told her that if I did say something that the patient took offense to I didn't mean it, will the ombudsmen be a little forgiving? Or just "f you, your desire to be a fantastic nurse, your application for nursing school and all of the above that correlates with you being in nursing"? I didn't call the patient a fat cow or a whale. I would never go down to that level. All I cared about, besides safety, was doing what the nurse asked: Help him pull her up to get comfortable. That was all that was on my mind. When I'm on the floor doing my run, I don't play around. I answer call lights as quickly as possible. If they want ice cream, ice water, a towel, I'll get it for them. If they want pain meds, I'll tell them "Ok, I'll go let your nurse know" and actually do it. I always do it. 

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4 minutes ago, Beldar_the_Cenobite said:

If it goes up to the Ombudsman, can the ombudsman be forgiving with my certification or are they just out right not for employees? Will she ask about my side of the story and if I told her that if I did say something that the patient took offense to I didn't mean it, will the ombudsmen be a little forgiving? Or just "f you, your desire to be a fantastic nurse, your application for nursing school and all of the above that correlates with you being in nursing"? I didn't call the patient a fat cow or a whale. I would never go down to that level. All I cared about, besides safety, was doing what the nurse asked: Help him pull her up to get comfortable. That was all that was on my mind. When I'm on the floor doing my run, I don't play around. I answer call lights as quickly as possible. If they want ice cream, ice water, a towel, I'll get it for them. If they want pain meds, I'll tell them "Ok, I'll go let your nurse know" and actually do it. I always do it. 

Yet you continue to type offensive, subliminal jabs which leads me to believe your tone and intent were condescending and disrespectful. People know when they should be offended and when others say things that aren't on the up and up. I don't believe you weren't offensive as you've done nothing but offend the poor woman here.

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Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

12,145 Visitors; 434 Posts

Just now, NurseBlaq said:

Yet you continue to type offensive, subliminal jabs which leads me to believe your tone and intent were condescending and disrespectful. People know when they should be offended and when others say things that aren't on the up and up. I don't believe you weren't offensive as you've done nothing but offend the poor woman here.

Is that bold highlighting and your reply you thinking I intentionally was disrespectful to the patient? You must be dyslexic because the contraction "did not" is in that bold statement. 

 

NurseBlaq: I see the sky looks blue, but I don't believe it. 

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2 minutes ago, Beldar_the_Cenobite said:

Is that bold highlighting and your reply you thinking I intentionally was disrespectful to the patient? You must be dyslexic because the contraction "did not" is in that bold statement. 

 

NurseBlaq: I see the sky looks blue, but I don't believe it. 

You just proved my point. Dyslexic is people misreading things, not interpretation which is what you're trying to be a smart Al about. I wholeheartedly believe you said something offensive. I made an observation and you immediately responds with an insult, albeit wrongly, but that's what it is.

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Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

12,145 Visitors; 434 Posts

6 minutes ago, NurseBlaq said:

You just proved my point. Dyslexic is people misreading things, not interpretation which is what you're trying to be a smart Al about. I wholeheartedly believe you said something offensive. I made an observation and you immediately responds with an insult, albeit wrongly, but that's what it is.

Your bold statement highlighted "I didn't call the patient a fat cow or a whale". Meaning I KNOWINGLY was in her room and didn't say those things to that level. Maybe it was something else that she might have taken to offense. Maybe I was verbally analyzing what kind of CNAs I work with and how many it would take to pull her up. Maybe it was just when I told my nurse "We have to have at least 4 people to pull her up". When some CNAs help they look like they're holding a tray in place when they hold the draw sheet instead of actually lifting. They don't actually lift. They're not actually putting in the effort. Hold the draw sheet like you're pulling on it and heave to the side the patient is going to up in the bed. When someone asks me to help them pull someone up, I NEVER say no find somebody else. That was one of two of my frustrations. The first one that I couldn't get any help with my nurse and I pulling her up. There are times when I wish management, non-nursing related, could also be accountable in helping CNAs when it comes to answering call lights and pulling patients up in bed. 

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not.done.yet has 8 years experience as a MSN, RN and works as a Professional Development Specialist.

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Your goals, dreams etc have nothing to do with the situation Beldar. So no, they will absolutely not consider any if that if you acted in a way that makes patients or their families feel less than well cared for.

90% of communication is nonverbal. That means only 10% of what you actually say matters. The rest is all tone, inflection, body posture, hand gestures, eye contact and the like. Nobody is fooled when someone is angry or resentful. It is very very easy to see it.

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