bi-polar and terminated

[democrat]

Recently terminated after 7 yrs. employment for conduct re: innability to get along with certain co-workers in unit. I started getting verbal reprimands from my manager in 2009 b/c getting into it with with the same people and 'my behaviour in unit' 'disrupting the unit'. I have a huge problem holding my tongue when I see people frequently milking the time clock for sometimes up to several hours when the census is down (or no patients in unit at all) socializing and playing on internet and should go home or go work in another unit while others of us were responsible enough to clock out and go home and losing alot of hours in the process. I complained alot to management about this to the point of being labeled as a tattler and I did finally manage to tick off management. Other things these nurses were doing/not doing was what I would call blatant neglect and poor patient care like: 1) not pulling a femoral sheath for 1-2 hours after it could have been removed (pt. staying on their back longer) 2) not moving the pt. to their private room and onto a more comfortable bed from a stretcher when there was no reasons why they should stay any longer (there were not pt. assignments- whoever was available for a pt. was next to get patient 3) nurse with pt's in unit and staying across hall in another unit socializing with friend (if their pt. called, IV pump alarming, family looking for nurse,etc.: this nurse was not able to see or hear anything that was going on with their patient) 4) give report to nurse on my patient that needed Q15 min check on groin; when I come back from lunch and get report, and then be told they forgot 5) I have pt. with B/P in 80's for over 1 hr./asymptomatic/Dr. aware; give report to nurse (same nurse as above) to go to lunch; come back from lunch to find pt. with B/P 69, symptomatic, wife reported no one had been in to check on her husband; got pt. stabilized and moved to CCU; when I asked nurse about why they did not check my pt: response was 'because I had other pt's to take care of'; this nurse had one stable patient. I had been having alot of altercations and at times not very nice with these nurses and making alot of complaints to management. Other nurses were making complaints too, just not near as much as I was. These nurses complained to HR about my behaviour in the unit after multiple altercations with them and multiple complaints to management about them. I kept having altercations with a unit secretary too for not doing many of the duties expected from a secretary (and complaining to management). I just had altercation after altercation and too many complaints to management so was verbally reprimanded several times and after 3 written reprimands teminated for 'innapropriate communication'. I have been completely upfront and honest with management and HR about being bi-polar, history of problems with interpersonal communication, the treatment I am currently under and any new updates with my medication since it was change and had to increased a few times. I do everything recommended to me by my psych dr. and counselor. I take it very seriously. What I did not do was ask for a accomidation although I don't know if that was even possible. I have been fired from about 80% of the jobs I have had in my lifetime for interpersonal problems and here I go and get fired from another job. I have not had any issues with patient care on this job other than a couple med errors that I actually wrote myself up on. I know that sometimes I don't realize (especially when I'm upset) how I come across to people verbally/ body language. I've got and unedited brain. Any recommendations would be greatly appreciated.

[dudette10, MSN, RN]

Insisting on the highest standards of patient care/work quality AND playing company/unit politics are not mutually exclusive.

[pedicurn, LPN, RN]

This is how I look at the issue of having to work and cooperate with not-so-stellar team members

I remind myself that I am being paid to be pleasant/friendly/ positive /cooperative with everybody while I'm on the clock

This means that even if they are unpleasant or lazy - I still have to be nice and get along.

Then I remember that it's nearly always easier retrospectively when I remember to do this.

Ofcourse it's all a bit of a performance sometimes .... but that gets better with practice and certainly saves a lot of strife.

I have learnt some easy playing along tricks with troublesome people.

When I walk onto the unit at shift start and have to deal with a troublemaker I remember to smile at them directly and say 'good morning' whatever and keep on walking past ...keeping it brief.

When a troublesome person asks me to help them ... I just smile directly at them and say 'sure' and immediately go do it .... keeping interaction pleasant and brief.

So I keep busy with my own p'ts while providing consistent pleasant/warm/polite brief

interaction with those team members I don't like

[Raidernurse]

It seems that a lot of the posters are ignoring the heading of the OP's post: Bi-polar is the operative word. Have you been diagnosed by a psychiatrist? If so, are you Type I or II and are you taking medications. What you are describing is commonly known as a "mixed state." Neither too manic or extremely depressed...but in a state of extreme irritability. Don't blame your disease per se...blame the fact that it is not under control. It is up to you to advocate for yourself and get on the right meds. Bipolar disorder does not respond well to therapy. If you don't have a psychiatrist, get one. Otherwise you can expect the same treatment again and again.

[systoly]

Have you thought about home health or private duty nursing? I'm not suggesting you hide from or ignore the need for addressing your difficulties, but you acome across as honest, self critical and dedicated to your patients, all excellent qualities for the above areas. I'd trust you with my family member and that's probably the single most sought after quality.

[pedicurn, LPN, RN]

Have you thought about home health or private duty nursing? I'm not suggesting you hide from or ignore the need for addressing your difficulties, but you acome across as honest, self critical and dedicated to your patients, all excellent qualities for the above areas. I'd trust you with my family member and that's probably the single most sought after quality.

Or maybe an ICU with 1:1 ratio ( avoid higher ratios as likely be too stressful) after some refinement of interpersonal skills for getting along with disliked staff members.

Lots of ICU nurses have very high standards and lowish tolerance for slackers and mediocre nurses .... those qualities are just fine there.

Then you can be the captain of your own little bedspace. I love ICU for those reasons.

[Orange Tree]

I tend to feel critical of colleagues when I perceive that they're not doing things the way I would. I also tend to be unsympathetic to their emotional/social needs because I don't have the same needs and view everything with a harsh logic. Anyway, I've learned a few things over the years...

1. I've learned (almost) that it's not my place to correct/direct/criticize my co-workers. There are people who only do 70% of what they should be doing and it drives me crazy sometimes. And although I think they should be at 100%, I have to remind myself that 70% is still passing (in most cases). No one wants to hear about the nurse who made a patient wait ten minutes for pain medication while they talked about their vacation in the nurses' station. That nurse is "passing". The nurse they want to hear about is the one who punches their patient in the stomach when they ask for pain medication.

2. Pointing out someones deficits rarely helps to improve their behavior. It's much better to find out what motivates a person and try to work at the situation from that angle. After all, the goal is to improve things, not to make them worse. And people who feel unjustly criticized tend to respond by doing even less than they were doing before.

3. Most people value their social/emotional lives a lot more than I do. A lot people need to have that ten minute conversation about their vacation to make it through the day and function at their highest level. It may seem unjust that a patient gets stuck waiting, but that slackly nurse may actually provide better care to all of his/her patients because they took care of their own needs first. I needed to understand that to become less critical.

I've also learned to support peoples emotions (almost) instead of telling them what they did "wrong". When someone shows up to work 20 minutes late because it's raining hard and there was a traffic accident, they don't want to hear about how they should have left their house earlier. They want to hear that you're glad they made it in OK. Tell people what they want to hear, at least some of the time, and you will find that it improves your working relationships greatly. I always try to think about the big picture, and that means letting small transgressions slide.

[MassED, BSN, RN]

First, my honest thoughts are, why would you tell them your medical condition? Is it any of their business?

Second, you sound like you were nit picking on a lot of stuff re: how soon you believe someone should get to the call light, IV alarms, etc. The nurse that you seem to have an issue with not checking certain things while you're on break, well, most of us know that when you're on lunch, MOST things won't get done. You should have things mostly tidy'd up before you go, or time it so you can address it in 30 minutes when you're done.

It never pays to gripe to management about interpersonal issues, unless it borders on physical altercation, threats, etc. Many people having issues with communicating that AREN'T bipolar, so it doesn't seem to make much difference that you're Bipolar and that you're trying to use your illness as an excuse.

Just my opinion.

[MassED, BSN, RN]

phew...not sure what to make of this.

i have learned, that my 'high standards' have gotten me in trouble before, when i expected the same from others.

as a matter of fact, whenever i've gone on an interview and i am asked what my weakest quality is, i always answer, "my high standards"...and continue to elaborate as to why it has interfered with my professional growth.

then when they ask what my strongest quality is, i still answer, "my high standards".

they always get a chuckle out of that, but it's so very true.

in other words, i hope you've learned to keep criticisms to yourself...

unless it involves an actual and dangerous risk to the pt.

...which leads me to the question, have you learned anything at all?

i mean, an 80% termination rate...do you continue to repeat the same mistakes?

and if so, do you believe it has to do with your bipolar?

are you on meds for your bipolar?

or are you in a manic episode when you feel compelled to state whatever's on your mind?

i would think you could get a reasonable accommodation, if you are on meds.

if you're not, then no...and you wouldn't deserve one anyways.

but if you did get an accommodation, it'd only be after proving that it's r/t uncontrolled bipolar (while on meds)...and still, in hindsight, you would likely have to prove that it is indeed, r/t your dx. i have my doubts.

seriously dude, what is it going to take for you to learn, that you just cannot speak whatever is on your mind, and not expect consequences...

esp in a professional environment.

you weren't terminated because you're bipolar.

you were terminated because you were creating a hostile workplace.

feel better.

leslie

I've missed your responses! I haven't read much of your stuff lately, but as usual, I agree with you!

[MassED, BSN, RN]

Yes, you are a tattler (that's a nice way of putting it).

Snitches are never liked. For you to report this also makes the manangers look like they aren't doing there job in supervising the employees. Next time, remember to snitch to Administration anonomously, not management.

Since your personality is so bold................................have you considered law school. You would fit right in.

god don't try to recruit more people to be lawyers. There are so many of them, that field is super overly saturated. And do you really want someone who might be difficult to be a lawyer? Really.

[MassED, BSN, RN]

this is how i look at the issue of having to work and cooperate with not-so-stellar team members

i remind myself that i am being paid to be pleasant/friendly/ positive /cooperative with everybody while i'm on the clock

this means that even if they are unpleasant or lazy - i still have to be nice and get along.

then i remember that it's nearly always easier retrospectively when i remember to do this.

ofcourse it's all a bit of a performance sometimes .... but that gets better with practice and certainly saves a lot of strife.

i have learnt some easy playing along tricks with troublesome people.

when i walk onto the unit at shift start and have to deal with a troublemaker i remember to smile at them directly and say 'good morning' whatever and keep on walking past ...keeping it brief.

when a troublesome person asks me to help them ... i just smile directly at them and say 'sure' and immediately go do it .... keeping interaction pleasant and brief.

so i keep busy with my own p'ts while providing consistent pleasant/warm/polite brief

interaction with those team members i don't like

it is always a performance. i put my war paint on (makeup), my work glasses, my hair in my "work hair" mode and it's game on. it is always being on stage, be ridiculed, judged, and observed. constantly. it's good to remember that.

[democrat]

I have read these posts about 3 times now; I appreciate your advice and comments

[democrat]

It seems that a lot of the posters are ignoring the heading of the OP's post: Bi-polar is the operative word. Have you been diagnosed by a psychiatrist? If so, are you Type I or II and are you taking medications. What you are describing is commonly known as a "mixed state." Neither too manic or extremely depressed...but in a state of extreme irritability. Don't blame your disease per se...blame the fact that it is not under control. It is up to you to advocate for yourself and get on the right meds. Bipolar disorder does not respond well to therapy. If you don't have a psychiatrist, get one. Otherwise you can expect the same treatment again and again.

Yes, I see a psychiatrist/NP; currently I take 300mg Trileptal TID and 300mg Welbutrin QAM. My last Trileptal level was around 4 with 600mg/day so she bumped it to 900mg. I have been seeing counselor also; I am Type I; I don't quite understand what the mixed state is-I can ask my Dr. about that. I do the stuff that's supposed to help-exercise regularly, get plenty of sleep, no caffiene. I know I need to start a mood chart. I am usually not what people around me would call irritable. I find myself getting very irritated if I see people I work with mainly 'not doing their best in taking care of patients' or doing their job to improve the flow of the unit. There are the other nurses in this unit that I never had an altercation with since we worked as a team.