I am currently in nursing school and considering what I would like to do in the future. I'm considering a lot of things and I know things might change as I get farther along In nursing school.
I am very passionate about pregnancy and babies. I believe pregancy and birth should be seen as incredible, not a disease. I believe that women's bodies know what they are doing and that natural childbirth should be encouraged whenever possible. I want to work with pregnant women and newborns, especially low income and young mothers, but I'm not only interested in the pregnancy and delivery part. I would love to get involved with breastfeeding promotion/support and health promotion after the baby is born but I'm not sure if that is something a CNM would be involved with.
Im concerned about the lack of work/family balance because I want children of my own and I don't want a nanny to raise them. Are there any jobs a CNM could do part time for a few years? Also, are CNMs involved with abortions or artificial family planning usually? I'm not willing to participate in or advocate for abortions or artificial family planning.
I am also doing research online and trying to find a midwife to shadow but I would love to get some information from the knowledgeable people on here.
I don't have an objection to a fundamental part of their being. I have an objection to deliberately making children who you know won't be raised by both of their parents. If it was a lesbian couple who planned to raise the child with the father, I would be much less opposed. If the single woman was planning to raise the child with the father, I would also be much less opposed. However, that's usually not the case.
Having a man in the family does not make the situation "better". A single woman, two women or two men (who use a surrogate) are perfectly capable of raising a happy, healthy child. There are many men that are AWFUL fathers and have no business being in the lives of their children - same with mothers. This is ridiculous thought process. Nursing is a job. If a client (patient) comes in and requests something that is in your scope of practice you set your personal beliefs aside and do your job.
I don't believe I have the right to be the gatekeeper to any legal services. I don't believe that certain services should be legal or easily accessible but as long as they are I will refer patients to someone who can provide whatever service they need whether I believe they should have access to that service or not. I will not provide those services, though. I don't feel that it's wrong to use my moral beliefs to decide what services I perform. As long as I'm willing to refer patients to someone else when they need a service I dont offer and I don't discriminate when it comes to services I do offer, Im doing what I need to do as a health care provider.
I think this is a fast track to a very slow practice. Good luck.
Im well aware that young, low income mothers have a high rate of abortion. That's part of the reason I want to work with them. Also, I said very clearly above that I would provide lgbt couples any service that I would provide anyone else. Having a man around doesn't automatically make a situation better but having a good father around does. There are lots of people who have no business having children and I would never help them have children. Also, I don't have to perform every service that's in my scope of practice. If a patient requests something I don't perform, I will refer them elsewhere, whether that service is in my scope of practice or not.
JJ1994, do you have children of your own? What experience do you have providing patient care?
I really, really do not mean to sound condescending, but your statements seem to suggest a very black and white understanding of the morality surround sex, sexuality, and reproduction. I wonder if more experience in the field would help you gain a wider perspective.
While I don't agree with your view on abortion, I can empathize to a certain extent. I also understand the idea that a two parent household confers certain benefits, even though I disagree 100% with the extrapolation that somehow single parents are therefore suboptimal.
Your statements about gay parents are homophobic and completely false.
There are lots of people who have no business having children and I would never help them have children.
And who are you to decide that? If you had left it at you feeling uncomfortable with abortions or feeling uneasy with certain procedures, then maybe this would've gone in a different direction, but sadly you have made it known that you feel you absolutely KNOW when and where a child, not YOUR child, is safe or if they should even be conceived. That is where a lot of us nurses have a problem. You are trying to internally play gatekeeper, but in the real world that doesn't fly.
I have 1 child and I'm a CNA. I'm still in nursing school so I don't have nursing experience yet. I don't think more experience In The field would make me more supportive of abortion, single mothers purposely conceiving children, or lgbt parents. A single parent may not be a suboptimal parent, they may be a great parent, but the situation is suboptimal because the child is growing up without one of its parents. Same thing with an lgbt couple. And I don't see where I made any statements that are homophobic or false concerning gay parents.
And who are you to decide that? If you had left it at you feeling uncomfortable with abortions or feeling uneasy with certain procedures, then maybe this would've gone in a different direction, but sadly you have made it known that you feel you absolutely KNOW when and where a child, not YOUR child, is safe or if they should even be conceived. That is where a lot of us nurses have a problem. You are trying to internally play gatekeeper, but in the real world that doesn't fly.
I don't have to be anybody to decide that. It's pretty clear that certain people should never have children. And if I'm going to be helping someone conceive a child, then I'm definitely gonna judge whther or not they should be parents. Hence why I said I wouldn't do artificial comception at all. I'm not trying to play gatekeeper but I you consider not providing artificial conception because I don't want to have to provide it in cases where I am opposed is trying to play gatekeeper, then I'm just fine with that.
I have 1 child and I'm a CNA. I'm still in nursing school so I don't have nursing experience yet. I don't think more experience In The field would make me more supportive of abortion, single mothers purposely conceiving children, or lgbt parents. A single parent may not be a suboptimal parent, they may be a great parent, but the situation is suboptimal because the child is growing up without one of its parents. Same thing with an lgbt couple. And I don't see where I made any statements that are homophobic or false concerning gay parents.
That's why we, as nurses are telling you that this won't fly, not in this profession. You don't get to choose your patient or what you want to do. I never spoke about abortions, I spoke about conception. Two completely different things. Yes, it bothers me because I have 2 nephews conceived via IVF and hearing that someone going into nursing wouldn't help their conception really makes me wonder why you'd want to be in a specialty where mothers, women, and babies are the concern, IVF/natural/lgbt/straight/single/married/poor/rich.
I understand you don't get to choose your patients and I've said multiple times that I'm not trying to. However, from other information I've gotten, CNMs can choose whether or not they want to provide artificial conception and I would choose not to. Are you bothered by all women's health providers that don't provide ivf? Or are you just bothered my reasoning for not wanting to do it if I become a CNM? I want to go into a specialty where mothers and babies are involved because I feel strongly about maternal and infant health and would like to provide care that is different from the usual medical model. I'm no expert, but im positive that there are many more aspects to nursing and midwifery than just abortion and conception and I refuse to believe that a good CNM has to provide those services.
Thanks everyone for responding. While I disagree with most of you, I'm very impressed by the wealth of knowledge some of you have. I got some helpful information but i believe that were just arguing opinions at this point so im going to concede and wish you all well.
JJ, as I was reading your posts, I too saw a very black and white approch in your thinking. Very idealistic. Then I looked at your screen name and saw 1994- is that the year you were born? That would make you a bout 20, which would jive well with your world view. I believe you're coming from an honest place, but that you aren't understanding how your verbalization is inflaming the other posters. Most people your age are still in the very concrete thinking stage (you will have to work hard with this in nursing school, as you'll quickly realize there is more than one right answer) and less able to see how outside factors can influence a situation. I do however thing it's completely fair and honest to have a "same rules for everyone" approach. It is very important to give the same care to all. You will need to work hard on your views/opinions/judgements of those groups of people who you feel less...."comfortable" with. Any nurse/person who says they haven't silently judged someone is lying, but with the way you express your views I would have a hard time picturing you being able to do this without it being at least somewhat noticeable to your patient or other healthcare workers.
To the other posters, could it be that in some instances some of you have taken offense at what was said and amplified it's meaning because you dislike her view more than that you think she would be an unsafe midwife? If she's willing to provide the same care for all people, willing to give referrals to practitioners who will provide the requested service and not refuse treatment, isn't that providing proper care?
I didn't even know CNMs did IVF-personally I'm stoked at this revelation as I want to be a CNM and have always thought it would be wonderful to help create families. But I will not participate in abortion. I will care for those who have had one with
kindness and compassion, but I will not physically take part in it. That doesn't mean I won't be a good nurse or CNM. It means that I don't want to participate in an action that I am not comfortable with. Period. Surely there is something that any one of you could find offense to and would not want to participate.
Well...that's my $0.02. Does it matter? Not really. We are all free to have our own feelings, thoughts and beliefs.
You're kidding right? Please tell me you are. Who are you to judge if a child will or won't be in an ideal home? Believe it or not, many women are stable enough to want a child, but don't want to be tied down in a relationship. Nurses with this mindset worry me. No one said to harm, but not even to bless a family with a baby? Lord, now you really wanna play God... You asked for our opinion on career choices correct? After reading all these posts, I think it's been clear.
BeachsideRN, ASN
1,722 Posts
Having a man in the family does not make the situation "better". A single woman, two women or two men (who use a surrogate) are perfectly capable of raising a happy, healthy child. There are many men that are AWFUL fathers and have no business being in the lives of their children - same with mothers. This is ridiculous thought process. Nursing is a job. If a client (patient) comes in and requests something that is in your scope of practice you set your personal beliefs aside and do your job.