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  1. cp1024

    Nurses Eating Their Young- A Different Perspective

    I graduated nursing school just a few weeks ago and preparing for my NCLEX. I've spent a lot of time wondering what my preceptor will be like when I am hired and have an opportunity to be a real nurse. I have seen all sides good nurses, bad nurses, good students as well as bad. And I very much hope, I'm not unlucky enough to be stuck with someone who takes joy in the pain and humiliation of others. It is my job to work hard, be prepared, and absorb as much information as possible while being oriented. It is my preceptor's job to teach me the ropes and help me learn. Yes, I do understand that not all nurses want preceptees...but I'm also thinking that those nurses don't want to work extra hours or have poor patient loads because they bullied the new grads into quitting. Sounds a lot like shooting yourself in the foot... That being said, I want to be told, clearly, if I'm about to do something unsafe. I want to know if there is a better, safer way to complete a task. I want to be a good nurse! You don't need to humiliate me to make that happen. Most times, I'll know I've made a mistake the moment I've made it, but not always, as I haven't gained the experience to make that judgement in all cases. Instead of talking behind my back and ridiculing me, ask me why I chose to do that, ask me what my thinking was and correct it. Use this moment to teach me a better way. Yelling at me won't teach me anything. Humiliating me, will only show others that you are a bully. Talking about me behind my back will damage my reputation, but eventually, it will speak more about your character than mine. You can't make me give up on being a nurse. You can, however, make me get my experience and get the heck off of the unit, leaving you with YET ANOTHER preceptee to teach and an increase in your work load....so yea...bully me. Seems like it hurts you more that it hurts me. Sad really, because with just a little common decency you could have helped made your unit a better and less stressful place to work.
  2. cp1024

    What Makes a Great Nurse

    Pricharilla, I don't think you made it at all clear that you wanted to omit those who found themselves addicted to drugs that were prescribed. That's why I said that you can't stick everyone in the same box. You seem to think that you're the only person who grew up in a "less than ideal" home. Well, you're not. My parents were much like you describe yours to be. I am not, and never will be an enabler, but I am able to have compassion for others and treat them properly. Many people who have alcohol or drug problems are that way because they started with a mental illness and are "self medicating" they NEED HELP! Not have someone watch them fall on their faces. I know a man who was an alcoholic and illicit drug user. If you asked him a few years ago, he would've told you he started doing and continued (with the alcohol) because he just liked doing it. After he threatened suicide, he was admitted to psych and discovered to have some pretty severe depression, anxiety and other mental issues. Because someone (me) didn't just blow him off and made sure he got help, (and this wasn't a pleasant journey) and is now well on his way to recovery. He's a changed person, not only because he's free of the substance, but because he now has a proper way to deal with his mental illness instead of burying. After self reflection, he said he knew what he was doing was wrong, and he wanted to stop, but couldn't because if he did his anxiety would nearly make him sick. He was self medicating. I do truly understand where you're coming from, and honestly I felt the same at one time. Those of us who have had to watch our parents throw their lives away have a horribly unique vantage point as to what it's like to live with an addict(s). But you have to realize that pov is not a non biased one. You are bringing your past feelings and dumping them on your future patients, and those living with addiction now. It's not fair to them, and it's not fair to you. You are carrying around the anger and hurt and the disappointment of all the things that happened to you. I feel your pain, and I completely understand. At the same time, you need to find a way to let that go. You will have prejudice against those you come into contact with as a nurse and it will color your judgement when caring for them. Make an appointment with a pastor, counselor, or whomever you feel comfortable with and unload your frustrations so that you can heal yourself, before you try to help others heal as a nurse.
  3. cp1024

    What Makes a Great Nurse

    I'm not a nurse yet either (start NS next semester) but you can't roll all people into a nice little box like that so that it makes it easier for you to wrap your head around. And perhaps it sounds harsh for me to put it that way, but I just wanted to point out that not all people who are addicted/or have been addicted are that way because they took things illegally, or took pain pills they didn't need.