Before Thanksgiving my nurse support group had our weekly meeting & the topic for discussion was gratitude. More specifically our counselor wanted us to discuss how involvement in monitoring improved our lot in life. A couple people there described how involvement in the program saved their lives and careers and I think that is a wonderful thing!!! More people were polite and said what they thought needed said to keep the counselor happy (I know this because we talk after the meeting). I told the counselor that my life was much worse in every category since being involved in the monitoring program. Literally nothing is better. Of course she hated that answer but it's the truth.
Anyway, I'd like to know if involvement in this program has made your life better. Are you happier now? More financially secure? Is your job better? Anything really. I'm simply curious
Specializes in Psych, Addictions, SOL (Student of Life).
Sign me up!
I am trying to come up with a way to trade contact information that's not on a public forum I don't want anyone to give up their anonymity here but need some people to help write letter's to their state legislators. Obviously I don't want anyone to risk their standing in whatever program they are in so folks who have finished their program would have less risk.
Specializes in ER, ICU/CCU, Open Heart OR Recovery, Etc.
Nope, massive debt, broken up family (mostly due to lack of finances, job in different city), draconian BON rules, list goes on. They (the BON) increase you're stress level by 1000%, limit places, positions and hours you can work, require you to spend thousands on testing, counselling etc and in all that recover and be happy. I'm not any better now than I was 3 years ago. One thing is for sure though. I'm never touching another bottle or vial of narcs because this is hell.
Similar to my sentiments on this. Also an incentive to stay clean, at least for me. When I go before the Board, I can look them in the eye.
Most importantly I can look myself in the eye, every day. It isn't about walking off into the sunset, which is bs anyways. It is about being able to have self respect. That isn't something the BON or the monitoring program gave me. It is something I earned.
Happy for you! I felt same way but I was a waitress so worst mistake I was going to make was spilling a drink on a customer. I could not live with alcohol and could not live without it. Intellectually I knew by age 18 that 'normal' drinkers did not black-out, wake up feeling like something the cat dragged in, have no idea how they got from point A to point B etc...
But on a gut level I thought I could beat it all on my own in spite of have no evidence I could ever drink with grace. During that 8 or so ensuing years and although I did not think it possible it just got worse. I added cocaine (this was the 1980s) I came to wanting to open my vein. Most God-awful period of my life but I knew I was a mess and did not take on any responsibilities such as college, marriage, parenthood. I hid in the very small town I grew up in and was never arrested.
Drinking buddy/manager found me in a weak state crashing from 3 day run and drove me to county detox. I saw my future; I also was not permitted back to my job until I had 30 days sober.
I was just on a pink cloud. I had forgotten how to laugh or smile, I felt good for the 1st time in a decade at age 28...stayed sober. I could have found another waitress job but had hit bottom, I will be grateful to that boss forever.
Yep I agree. In my state we lose about 9% of the participants in the monitoring program, I feel those are probably the actual alcoholics and addicts who desperately need help. The rest of us manage to pee clean for 1/2 a decade. They are thrown away like so much old trash. For nurses to be OK with that is a travesty
Indeed, that 9% likely do consist of those with the worst problems. I knew two nurses who had very bad problems and neither one made it through the 1st 6 months.
I was vaguely aware they were addicts given they also lived in this small town 30 years ago, I ran with a different crowd, I remember we felt a little sense of superiority since we were not heroin addicts (never-mind that we'd been awake for 2-3 days fueled by alcohol and coke desperately attempting to ward off the dreaded crash.)
So there they pop up on the radar in AA not wanting to be there, not ready to quit drinking. They really were discarded by the BON, I wish they had stayed sober with or without BON blessing, I don't know what became of them beyond licenses being revoked.
hppygr8ful, ASN, RN, EMT-I
4 Articles; 5,212 Posts
I am trying to come up with a way to trade contact information that's not on a public forum I don't want anyone to give up their anonymity here but need some people to help write letter's to their state legislators. Obviously I don't want anyone to risk their standing in whatever program they are in so folks who have finished their program would have less risk.
Hppy