I work in Med/Surg and we are in a constant state of flux...pts and nurses both with high turn over...pretty much like many of the M/S units on the planet,anyway...
I work with a RN that scares the wee-wee out of me. She is like a time bomb waiting to off any second. I'm thinking it 50% floor stress and 50% her personality. Every time I work with her, I can ensure that there will be a huge drama sometime during the shift that she will be directly involved in. If it's not with a patient, it's with the pt's family, a doctor or most often another coworker. I personally try to stay out of the line of fire. If you wind up on her poop list...you can guarantee being written up for something even if it is sheer pettiness. She can be very threatening and others have said that if I valued the tires on my vehicle, not to cross her!!! What the hey????? She has to constantly remind others that she IS a GOOD nurse especially when she has made some sort of a judgement call. Management does little to calm her because she threatens them as well. IF they dare do anything to her...she WILL SUE the entire hospital.
Can someone tell me how to play nice with this person???? It makes it harder and harder to go to work knowing that I may be the one who lights the fuse!!!
She has several evil twins I have worked with over the years. I'd go to HR or even your EAP. Your managers, charge people etc. have let her get away w/ this stuff. I stay the he!! away from this type, but if they are "attacking" you or endangering pt's., you will be forced to act. Witnesses are great if they back you up, but don't bet on it. Many people are really scared of this type of person and won't stand up to her even in dire circumstances. I have often wondered if these folks like her aren't enjoying some sort of ellicit substances, etc. which could partially explain their bizzare escapades.
Specializes in ER (new), Respitory/Med Surg floor.
Beary,
This doesn't have to be this way, but it is because people have let it be this way, and "she" is getting just what she wants. Control! She has everyone scared to death to cross her for fear of retaleation, so she can do what ever she wants to, and say what ever she wants to.
Until such a time that either one very strong person, or a group stand up to her she will continue to be the way she is, and make everybodies life miserable.
As has been said in other posts, document all that happens with your involvement with her so if she does start screaming law suite you have back up. Basically, CYA to the hilt!
Take Care,
Dan
I work with such a person as well and it's horrible. People misconstrue her as confident but she's not! She has such low selfesteem she nitpicks everything to make herself feel better about herself. She'll repeat instances how she told this doctor this and she'll say he was so upset and with investigation find out the doctor was not upset at all and it was settled. She creates issues at times and it's pathetic. Some of her complaints are warrented but it's constant. She's trying to control and is basically a bully. She usually backs down if you confront her but behind your back she's writing you up and complaining to the manager. She outright lies as well which worries me. She is an amazing juggler with tasks as a charge nurse but it's this personality that makes it totally horrible to work with her. I've repeatedly talked to my manager about this as I know others have. People have confronted this nurse as well with no changes. Management speaks to her but yet it stays the same. NOW it developed into a hornets nest. We have several coworkers not working well together helping this bully feed into the chaos with not so supportive technicians and unit clerks everyone is leaving the floor. I'm transfering to the ER now b/c I can't stand the work atmosphere at all.
You do have to watch your back around these people. They will look for you to open any area that they can backstab you to make themselves look better. And it can be over ridiculous issues. It is so stupid because it really is irrelevant but it's enought to make it intolerable to work with. You have way more stuff to worry about yet there is this!
I had one instance where I had to leave an OR checklist to the night shift which was done but the bully nurse was upset 3-11 didn't do it when I had more pressing issues and determined I needed to let that go to get the job done. I usually do the list but that ONE night I was more concerned about the pt's respitory status and dealing with that to even MAKE it to OR in the am. Plus the next shift did do it. This bully during a meeting walked into it blurrted out my shift needs to do the list and not using my name explained the exact scenario involving me I just mentioned to our head manager and director inpatient services infront of a large part of our staff then walked out in 3 min before she heard me respond back. I admitted hey it was me and said what happened. They say well as long as it's not consistent and all over this checklist that was done! WHAT the heck!!!! WHY are we discussing this! After I got out I confronted her and told her you know I usually get all my work done and had to let that thing go for the night and was not wrong to let it go to nights. She would not look me in the eye and said it was not me it was the other nurses on my shift she was trying to make sure the list was done. NOT me!!!! Then who was she talking about?! it was me! I was so angry. I see her point to enforce others but that is not what happened. She has been trying to find something to complain about me and used this for whatever reason she gets out of it. It is so ridiculous dealing with stuff like this when there is more important stuff. I just do my best, and try to ignore her. The sick thing is I can't respond back angry or upset because we do have to work together. You occasionaly confront her, she backs down, or rather finds someone else to target then wraps back to you.
I'm a young nurse but I thought our superiors are suppose to stifle people like this to not cause trouble with staff? Finally I've come to the conclusion I'll just leave if they're not going to fix it.
I agree with burnout. It is only going to take one strong nurse to keep this gal in her place and the rest will fall into line and not take it either. Noone has ever shown her there is a united front not to put up with her bullying anymore. Maybe you can be the one to empower the rest to stand up for themselves.
As your co-worker with a shared goal of providing excellent service to people and families, I commit the following:
I will accept responsibility for establishing and maintaining healthy interpersonal relationships with you and every member of this staff.
I will talk to you promptly if I am having a problem with you. The only time I will discuss it with another person is when I need advice or help in deciding how to communicate with you appropriately.
I will establish and maintain a relationship of functional trust with you and every member of this staff. My relationships with each of you will be equally respectful, regardless of job titles or levels of educational preparation.
I will not engage in the '3B's (bickering, back-biting and bitching) and will ask you not to as well.
I will not complain about another team member and ask you not to as well. If I hear you doing so, I will ask you to talk to that person.
I will accept you as you are today, forgiving past problems, and ask you to do the same with me.
I will be committed to finding solutions to problems rather than complaining about them or blaming someone, and ask you to do the same.
I will affirm your contribution to quality service.
I will remember that neither of us is perfect, and that human errors are opportunities not for shame or guilt, but for forgiveness and growth.
(Adapted from Marie Manthey, President of Creative Nursing Management in Caroline Flint's Midwifery Teams and Caseloads 1993; p. 138)
I think every hospital has one. I quit doing 1-1 with her and would walk away if she pressed it. I also would get another person to make sure she couldn't lie about it She hated witnesses. management finally started payinjg attention when another nurse skipped the chain of command and went to HR with complaints of harrassment and one night the 2 nurses that had to work with her in charge refused to tak report because they were not going to work with her for any reason. She always threatened to sue also. there was so much paper flying in write ups from nurses on other units She did get fired and tried to sue but with so many write-ups from so many nurses she couldn't
so many wonderful responses! thanks to all!:icon_hug: this is something that has bothered me for the last 3 years that i have had to work with this person. i appreciate that you have shared your similar stories because it helps me feel like i'm not alone. the article on horizontal violence in the workplace is tops....thank you much!!!!!
I found the site several months ago when I was tackling a research paper on horizontal violence in nursing. Ironically, the instructor that I showed the site to (and the commitment to co-workers) turned out to be a shockingly sneaky passive/aggressive bully.
Sometimes I wonder about my sanity....staying with this profession.
imenid37
1,804 Posts
She has several evil twins I have worked with over the years. I'd go to HR or even your EAP. Your managers, charge people etc. have let her get away w/ this stuff. I stay the he!! away from this type, but if they are "attacking" you or endangering pt's., you will be forced to act. Witnesses are great if they back you up, but don't bet on it. Many people are really scared of this type of person and won't stand up to her even in dire circumstances. I have often wondered if these folks like her aren't enjoying some sort of ellicit substances, etc. which could partially explain their bizzare escapades.