An actual 1955 Good Housekeeping article

SillyLilly · Oct 5, 2006

OTOH - I think of all the divorces and failed relationships, the casual nature of relationships, the breakdown of the family - perhaps it wasn't such a bad thing. I think of course the main thing is that we are ALL (m + F) working too much, so the kids don't get as much of our attention and energy, and neither do our marriages.
So I think there is something to be said for traditional roles to some extent. Our families are in deep trouble and it's only going to get worse.
Don't nobody kill me, k? But after two failed marriages, I would be happy to be married in an "old school" way - (so I think...)

Im sickly scared of marriage for that reason, but again, because of all this insight, empowerment, etc we are exposed to, my boyfriend and I can make an appropriate decision for ourselves. At least I hope! But what do I know! My boyfriend and I are waiting to marry, not even moving intogether yet (together for 4 years).

Liddle Noodnik · Oct 5, 2006

Im sickly scared of marriage for that reason, but again, because of all this insight, empowerment, etc we are exposed to, my boyfriend and I can make an appropriate decision for ourselves. At least I hope! But what do I know! My boyfriend and I are waiting to marry, not even moving intogether yet (together for 4 years).

Silly Lilly, neat name. Well it is good to go into marriage with that attitude, that you are scared. The statistics speak for themselves. All the pre-marital preparation you can do should (might?) help. If you are involved with a church for example you can get pre-marital counseling, and of course there are plenty of lay counselors who can help you do this.

I think the biggest thing is to have who YOU are well under your belt - I was saying the right things ("I don't NEED a man, but I would like to CHOOSE to be with someone...") - but - in reality, I was very dependent on having a relationship.

A year after nursing school for example I had an awesome job and an awesome apt., got involved with someone, and 3 months after I met him moved in with him 2 hrs away, lost so much ground, gave up my "self" - NOT RECOMMENDED! I repeated this cycle many times. Now I'm 47 and I'm angry that I did that to myself.

Anyway ... lol... shouldn't be talking about this right before bed, silly me!

nite!

TazziRN, RN · Oct 5, 2006

There are certain parts of the "older style marriage" I like, like the man who worships his bride. However, I could not live completely like that. If we won the lottery tomorrow I would cut back on my schedule but I wouldn't quit....I love my job too much and need the break from my family too much to do that. I love my husband and kids, but being a type of wife from this article's era would drive me to family-cide!

Liddle Noodnik · Oct 5, 2006

There are certain parts of the "older style marriage" I like, like the man who worships his bride. However, I could not live completely like that. If we won the lottery tomorrow I would cut back on my schedule but I wouldn't quit....I love my job too much and need the break from my family too much to do that. I love my husband and kids, but being a type of wife from this article's era would drive me to family-cide!

family-cide - good word for it! snicker... I understand where you're coming from, especially when my son was like 2-3 y.o. YIKES! He was a joy and a terror@

BSNtobe2009 · Oct 5, 2006

I have an old pamphlet issued by the Virginia Board of Health that talked about being able to "potty train" an infant to use a vessel (similar to a bedpan) at 4 months!

It also talked about how a baby should be given solid foods as soon as possible, it recommended tomato and orange juice...ahhh!

It also said that they should be handled as little as possible for the first 6 months..only to pick up for feedings and bathing.

My, how things have changed.

barbara1 · Oct 5, 2006

uuuhhhhgggg!!!

BSNtobe2009 · Oct 5, 2006

My mother was dismissed from nursing school when it was discovered she married my father. She had to transfer (these were the days prior to transferring credits) and start all over again.

I think she went to Jefferson Memorial Hospital in Roanoke, Virginia. She completed her education at Johnston Memorial in Abington, Virginia.

Liddle Noodnik · Oct 5, 2006

I have an old pamphlet issued by the Virginia Board of Health that talked about being able to "potty train" an infant to use a vessel (similar to a bedpan) at 4 months!
It also talked about how a baby should be given solid foods as soon as possible, it recommended tomato and orange juice...ahhh!
It also said that they should be handled as little as possible for the first 6 months..only to pick up for feedings and bathing.
My, how things have changed.

yeeks!

Well "Boards of health" have been known to have their heads in the sand, even NOW!

BSNtobe2009 · Oct 5, 2006

I think the poster made that remark to get a rise out of you. You fell for it.
I went to school in the 70s. When I was taking home ec. our book had similar advice for us. My mother believed this is how a woman should behave until she died 3 years ago. It was just how things were back then. There are plenty of people around who still think this way. It's not all that unheard of.

I am very conservative in some ways....if the wife doesn't have a full-time job outside the home, I do believe the house should always be clean and her husband should come home to a hot meal. If she does work full-time, hubby is just as capable of picking up a dustpan as she is.

Liddle Noodnik · Oct 5, 2006

My mother was dismissed from nursing school when it was discovered she married my father. She had to transfer (these were the days prior to transferring credits) and start all over again.
I think she went to Jefferson Memorial Hospital in Roanoke, Virginia. She completed her education at Johnston Memorial in Abington, Virginia.

I was trying to look up more on that "no marriage" policy (it hung in there for quite some time!). But anyway - I found this site instead that was interesting, on wartime nursing (around the time of Pearl Harbor)...

http://www.jhu.edu/~jhumag/1198web/nurses.html

TazziRN, RN · Oct 5, 2006

I am very conservative in some ways....if the wife doesn't have a full-time job outside the home, I do believe the house should always be clean and her husband should come home to a hot meal. If she does work full-time, hubby is just as capable of picking up a dustpan as she is.

I agree wholeheartedly! Being a wife/mother and having a job outside the home is having two jobs. Many men just don't get that and don't understand why we get pissed when they come home and want to put up their feet, but expect us to come home and jump right into running the house.

nursejohio, ASN, RN · Oct 6, 2006

I have an old pamphlet issued by the Virginia Board of Health that talked about being able to "potty train" an infant to use a vessel (similar to a bedpan) at 4 months!

Actually this is still around. It's not so much "potty training" an infant as it is learning their signals before they go, much like a breastfeeding mom learning the cues of a hungry baby. The theory is that if the babies don't learn to eliminate in a diaper for the first 2+ years, they'll really be potty trained at a much earlier age because they don't have to unlearn going in their pants. Proponents of this method say potty training can be completed around 15-20 months.

http://www.timl.com/ipt/