Afraid I started a hostile situation

[33762FL]

I'm a relatively new RN - 8 months of med surg and 7 weeks on my current unit, which is faster paced and shorter shifts than my old unit. I've been holding up well enough so far, until an inicident last week. In a situation with a patient, I endorsed a few non-critical and well documented things, all of which would have been ideally completed on my shift but due to other (documented) factors, I had not. The next, very senior, RN stated this was unacceptable and that she would write me up to the unit manager. She proceeded to raise her voice tell me to "shut up", say I was stupid and arrogant, that I'd kill all my patients, and that I'd better stay over time until the MD called and I could get the signature in question (I had called the MD about the situation earlier and he said he was coming in to see the patient and sign). This blowout was witnessed by the entire staff, it was at the nurse's station. It was also not the first time I endorsed to this RN and was loudly berated over something, this was just the worst blowout that had taken place. Given that she stated she would seek disciplinary action against me, I went to talk to the general supervisor about what had happened. The general supervisor said I hadn't done anything that warranted discipinary action, everything that happened was routine. The general supervisor said I need to talk to the unit manager about this, as the other RN's hostile behavior was unacceptable (although already known to management). I did that, with written documentation about the patient situation to tell my side of the story. The unit manager said she needs me to also write up what happened with the other RN becuase she can't have this kind of behavior on the unit.

I am terrified of retaliation from this RN after she learns that I "wrote her up" rather than her writing me up, as she stated she would do but did not. I don't think it helps that most of the staff are of one ethnicity, and I am not (nor is the manager). I feel like if the manager wants a statement I have to provide her with it, regardless of consequences from the other RN. I don't know how much worse it could get since I am already being publically berated, called stupid, told to shut up, etc. but I fear it will. What on earth can I do for damage control?

[Lynx25, LPN]

I think you DID damage control.

She can't act ridiculous like that, she needs to cool her jets. Maybe the administration will take your write up seriously, and act on it.

No one wants to work with a toddler, I think you handled it very well, from your side of the story.

[33762FL]

The manager is concerned about patients and family members seeing or hearing unprofessional behavior, and how wants to talk to the other RN. It's a union facility and this is a senior RN who has been there quite a while (and other staff seem to be aware her behavior). It doesn't look like a situation that will result in any actual disciplinary action against anybody, thank goodness, because I don't like conflict and don't want any more than their already is. I wish I could have just talked to the manager about the patient situation and not have had the other RN know about it, but the manager doesn't want to leave it here.

[FORTHELOVEOF!!!!]

You sound almost as if you caused this. I think you should look at it the other way around, she caused this, it was her unprofesional attitude that got her in this not yours. If you are worried about her trying to say the boss and you are racist, don't, most hospitals are equal opportunity employers and if she has a grievance she can file with them and they can do their own investigation, you shouldn't have to worry about that, you just do what you know is right. She is the one who needed to do damage control, you took it to your supervisor which is exactly what should've happened because she doesn't seem like the type to have a rational conversation about her own poor behavior. Follow it through so she knows you aren't going to put up with that kind of unprofesional behavior. As long as you are good nurse who does what's best for her patients she will have little ammo to retaliate with and you will have documentation to help prove retaliation if she does decide to make something up to get back at you. You would think this kind of behavior would be left in school, sorry you have to deal with such a tough situation!

[Bklyn_RN]

First, you need to grow a spine. How are you going to advocate for your pts if you are too afraid to advocate for yourself. This "senior RN" doesn't like you and probably never will. But if you stand up to her instead of cowering, she will then have no choice but to show you some R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Or at the least be professional and watch the way she speak to you in the future. She could have pulled you aside and speak to you privately. She didn't, so now she has to pay the piper. How is that your fault? Senior nurses like to think that they are above reproach and can display uncivilized behavior with impunity. Well they can't!

[Altra, BSN, RN]

Leave race/ethnicity out of it, as it has no bearing here. The behavior needs to stop.

[NO50FRANNY]

Ugh, tricky. If your manager has requested a written statement with your version of events you are obliged to do so but if you truly would prefer not to, you could discuss it with your manager. Explain that you fear professional/personal repercussions. You could say that given how new you are to the unit, you would prefer to sort it out face to face with her yourself. I know that speaking with this RN is likely the last thing you want to do, but stick up for yourself, and let her know that you won't tolerate any escalation of the same behaviour in the future and that you were asked to write her up and declined to do so. I would also let her know that the second she raises her voice or resorts to unpleasantries, you will quietly walk away (and follow through).

If you end up having to write the statement, simply state the facts, without emotion. Name calling and personal attacks, not to mention verbal threats are totally inappropriate, especially if patients and other staff are within earshot. Telling you to shutup is appalling. I get the impression, given that you mentioned that her behaviour has already been noticed by management that your unit manager is keeping documentation on file to build a case so to speak. Managers need written complaints from more than one staffmember to start addressing behaviour / professionalism (especially in cases where the employee is senior). MOST importantly, make sure you are completely blame free, and if not you must address your side of the problem too. It was a little bit unclear what tasks you were unable to carry out- could you elaborate? As you already said, it sounds like the situation can't get much worse so the only way is up, stay positive.

Good luck.

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

NUMBER ONE! You did not cause the hostile situation.

You have encountered a bully that committed lateral violence.

Perhaps this nurse does not realize that we have a job that requires 24 hours of patient care needs.

If you can't complete all of the tasks during your shift.. the next shift ..simply... has to follow through!!!

You have already done damage control ...you called her out on the behavior with proper notification and documentation.

Hold your head up high.. realize that you followed the proper channels.

Excellent job for a newbie... even some seasoned nurses would have cow-towed.

Feel free to pm me about the other issue.

Sorry you ran across this so early in your career.:hug:

[classicdame, MSN, EdD]

Cut the guilt crap. You are not responsible for someone else's behavior. If I were the manager I would want write ups so I would have a paper trail that justified me firing the obnoxious nurse. We finally got rid of some "Great" nurses with bad attitudes and, guess what, our productivity got better. Patient care improved without them. Not so great after all.

[BostonTerrierLover, BSN, RN]

I tell my employees that I will ALWAYs back them up if they walk away from a NON-EMERGENT hostile situation. I don't care whether it is a Patient, Patient's Family, Lab, RT, XRay, PT, Doctor, Vender, or a Nurse. Hostile confrontation is against policy at my facility, and a nurse of 11 years was fired yesterday (after other transgressions as well), for grabbing a new grad RN by the arm to "pull them" over to the dry erase board because of a disagreement over a 24 hr urine on/off ice for heavy metals.

It is NEVER okay to get hostile, loud, or touch another person in public OR Private.

As long as you are standing in front of them, YOU are giving THEM a STAGE. When you walk off, you take that Power, Authority, and "Stage" away.

[somedaypeds]

Altra - I disagree that ethnicity/race has no bearing. She feels like she is the minority. In feeling that way, it can be harder "grow a spine" and speak up. I think that is the important part of it. I can see her point there.

You are right about the behavior. No matter what the ethnicities of any of the individuals, that behavior cannot be tolerated.

[Altra, BSN, RN]

somedaypeds, I mean that unless the OP has clear evidence that the behavior is racially motivated, it would best to focus any discussions with management on the behavior that is a problem. As charge nurse, if you come to me with an interpersonal conflict I need specifics of behavior in order to deal with it. If you include racial connotations then we have a whole other problem.