Actual discussion between scrub and surgeon

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Specializes in Only the O.R. and proud of it!.

MD: "Are we on a 30-degree down scope?"

CST: "Ya"

MD: "How do you know?"

CST: "It says on the console"

MD: "Ya, I know but I'm not sure"

😳

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MD: The diathermy (bovie) is not working (*not pressing the button properly*, on purpose as always)

Me: Press the button properly.

MD: Oh right.

Seems every week there is some issue with the diathermy. Seems like every week the solution is to press the buttons properly.

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First case of the day -

Me - Doc, do you need want this marcaine on the field, or will you use it before I prep the patient?

Doc - No, the patient is blocked. I never use marcaine when they're blocked.

Me - *reads "always uses marcaine, even when pt. blocked" on the preference card*

Second case of the day -

Doc - where is the marcaine? Why isn't it on the field?

Me - it's right here. I didn't dispense it because the patient is blocked.

Doc - What does that have to do with it?

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Specializes in Complex pedi to LTC/SA & now a manager.
MD: The diathermy (bovie) is not working (*not pressing the button properly*, on purpose as always)

V

MD: Oh right.

Seems every week there is some issue with the diathermy. Seems like every week the solution is to press the buttons properly.

Reminds me of of a preschool aged patient

Child (Eyes closed shut tight) "I can't see. I can't see!"

Nurse "well how do we fix that?"

Child "I open my eyes!" (Opens eyes) "I can see" laughs hysterically.

Other nurses panicked. Sometimes the simple answer is the best answer

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Specializes in OR, Nursing Professional Development.

Not a surgeon/scrub conversation, but circulator/ICU nurse conversation.

Phone rings. ICU nurse: Hi, was wondering if I have enough time to go to lunch before taking this patient.

Me, knowing I've got at least another hour in the OR: Absolutely.

ICU nurse: Great, can I get report?

Me: Well, if you want it, but it'll change a lot.

ICU nurse: Yes, please.

Me: Patient is having CABG x3 and an AVR. Left radial art line, right IJ central line and PA cath. Will have two mediastinal chest tubes and one left pleural chest tube. Currently has not received any blood products. Vitals are meaningless at this point since we're still on pump.

ICU nurse: Well, can I have the vitals anyway?

Me, smirking as I think of the reaction: Currently in asystole, heart rate of zero, pressure is 55 over 50, PA is 3 over 3 and CVP is 0.

ICU nurse: Oh my God! The patient's coding? Shouldn't you be helping with that?

Me: No, when they're on pump having heart surgery we like this. That's why I said the vitals are meaningless. I'll call you with an updated report when it's time.

Sometimes I wish that all nurses taking postop patients had to observe the surgeries so they'd have something of an idea.

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Specializes in 2 years school nurse, 15 in the OR!.

Love all my nurses I work with! Got a call from the trauma room:

Nurse: Patient is bleeding everywhere, the Neptune won't work we have tried everything! We need suction.

Me: I'm coming.

Nurse: Thank god, suction won't work!

I go into the room, walk over to the Neptune and turn it on.

Me: Problem solved.

LOL

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Surgeon: YOU AREN'T TALKING TO ME. WHY AREN'T YOU TALKING TO ME?

Two minutes later....

Surgeon: I like complete silence in here. The OR is not the place for talking.

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