If your school isn't all free/reduced meals...

[SaltineQueen]

How does your school handle breakfast and/or lunch when a student's lunch account (if that's how you handle meal payments) gets too far in the hole?

New policy this year is that if a student goes $X in the negative they get an alternate lunch of a cheese sandwich & milk...all grades, K-12!! There is no way that is going to sustain a child who may not have eaten breakfast, let alone a middle or high school athlete.

We were faced with this situation for the first time today & it broke our hearts (student is obviously not a F/R meal kiddo). We ended up covering it so the student could eat a "normal" lunch today & hope mom comes through with her promise to send lunch money. I despise the fact that we are punishing the kids because the parent can't get their **** together! I'm rallying our nurses to try to change this. We can take a parent to court over unpaid book fees, why not meal fees?

Mods...please don't post this to FB.

[lifelearningrn, BSN, RN]

"Lunch shaming?" I have never heard that term.

What is the solution/replacement for doing away with the cheese sandwich and milk provision for those not qualifying for free lunch but have a negative lunch balance?

The solution is to work out a plan to pay back the negative balance, but to allow the child a regular lunch in the meantime. Essentially, making the issue between the school and the parents, not the child.

[OldDude]

The solution is to work out a plan to pay back the negative balance, but to allow the child a regular lunch in the meantime. Essentially, making the issue between the school and the parents, not the child.

So what if the negative balance isn't worked out?

[lifelearningrn, BSN, RN]

So what if the negative balance isn't worked out?

Probably refusal to release records/report cards, similar to when they owe money for other reasons? Parents do need to take responsibility, for sure, but at the same time, it's embarrassing for kids to be singled out at lunch. The school I work at ALL students get free breakfast and lunch, so it isn't a problem here but in other schools cafeterias were throwing away trays of food when a kid would get up to the counter and be found to have a negative balance. There were several news stories over the years. The cheese sandwich and milk is a better solution to THAT, but only slightly. There are a lot of families that don't qualify for free/reduced that can fall through the cracks.

U.S. schools rethink 'lunch shaming' policies that humiliate children with meal debts | PBS NewsHour

[MrNurse(x2), ADN]

So what if the negative balance isn't worked out?

I see where you are going with this. So everyone has taken a very important piece of this puzzle out, and that is accountability. Sadly, schools are in the position that the students are ultimately the "victims" of discipline that should go to parents. It is also a sad fact that there are parents that may not care about the shame their children feel about the non payment. There is really no other way to hold people accountable that would actually work. A cheese sandwich is substinance, maybe not ideal, but it is acceptable given the circumstances. Giving this can, and should, be done privately so there is no shaming. I have been there, I cobbled together some seriously inventive lunches when my wife was unemployed, magnify that by the crucible of private school, and that shaming was magnified. We don't live in a communist society, so there will never be equal, we need to stop pointing out the differences.

[Farawyn]

The School Nurses Memories Thread is on FB now.

[OldDude]

I see where you are going with this. So everyone has taken a very important piece of this puzzle out, and that is accountability. Sadly, schools are in the position that the students are ultimately the "victims" of discipline that should go to parents. It is also a sad fact that there are parents that may not care about the shame their children feel about the non payment. There is really no other way to hold people accountable that would actually work. A cheese sandwich is substinance, maybe not ideal, but it is acceptable given the circumstances. Giving this can, and should, be done privately so there is no shaming. I have been there, I cobbled together some seriously inventive lunches when my wife was unemployed, magnify that by the crucible of private school, and that shaming was magnified. We don't live in a communist society, so there will never be equal, we need to stop pointing out the differences.

EXACTLY!!! MR...how about putting a stop to the lunch shaming??????? Isn't this a form of bullying?

[lifelearningrn, BSN, RN]

I see where you are going with this. So everyone has taken a very important piece of this puzzle out, and that is accountability. Sadly, schools are in the position that the students are ultimately the "victims" of discipline that should go to parents. It is also a sad fact that there are parents that may not care about the shame their children feel about the non payment. There is really no other way to hold people accountable that would actually work. A cheese sandwich is substinance, maybe not ideal, but it is acceptable given the circumstances. Giving this can, and should, be done privately so there is no shaming. I have been there, I cobbled together some seriously inventive lunches when my wife was unemployed, magnify that by the crucible of private school, and that shaming was magnified. We don't live in a communist society, so there will never be equal, we need to stop pointing out the differences.

The parents should be the ones held accountable, not the children. I see how much food is thrown away in the school cafeteria, serving a kid a hot lunch will not be a loss to the school. I think *most* parents are responsible, but for the few that aren't, for whatever reason, the parent should bare the brunt of the embarrassment (harass them like a bill collector), not the kid. JMO

[OldDude]

The parents should be the ones held accountable, not the children. I see how much food is thrown away in the school cafeteria, serving a kid a hot lunch will not be a loss to the school. I think *most* parents are responsible, but for the few that aren't, for whatever reason, the parent should bare the brunt of the embarrassment (harass them like a bill collector), not the kid. JMO

I agree, totally, but my point is where is the origin of the lunch shaming? Who has pointed this out as being something negative and who has perpetuated it? Couldn't it just as easily be represented as something positive?

[lifelearningrn, BSN, RN]

I agree, totally, but my point is where is the origin of the lunch shaming? Who has pointed this out as being something negative and who has perpetuated it? Couldn't it just as easily be represented as something positive?

Definitely a media thing. Over the past few years there have been lots people go to the press with incidents of their children being embarrassed because the lunch lady threw their lunch away because they had no money. Another time a lady got fired for REFUSING to throw the lunch away. It ended up on the radar of a law maker in New Mexico, and other states are putting laws on the books against this policy.

[OldDude]

Definitely a media thing. Over the past few years there have been lots people go to the press with incidents of their children being embarrassed because the lunch lady threw their lunch away because they had no money. Another time a lady got fired for REFUSING to throw the lunch away. It ended up on the radar of a law maker in New Mexico, and other states are putting laws on the books against this policy.

How about a law to deal with this. Cashier stops the lunch line to deal with a student on the free lunch program..."you don't have a fruit, you have to have a fruit or you can't get a meal, now go over there and get a fruit...as she sets the kid's tray to the side to continue on with the line until the kid comes back with a fruit. Isn't that a form of "lunch shaming?"

[OyWithThePoodles, RN]

How about a law to deal with this. Cashier stops the lunch line to deal with a student on the free lunch program..."you don't have a fruit, you have to have a fruit or you can't get a meal, now go over there and get a fruit...as she sets the kid's tray to the side to continue on with the line until the kid comes back with a fruit. Isn't that a form of "lunch shaming?"

As I said, all of our meals are free. BUT THIS DRIVES ME CRAZY!!! They make kids get food they know they aren't going to eat. SO wasteful. My diabetic kiddos will pick out what they want and I will write it on a post-it. Mom wants them to stay under 50 carbs, sometimes this means just spaghetti, breadstick, and water. Which to me sounds fine. But they MAKE them get another item. I always tell them not to eat it if we didn't count for it.

In the mornings I go and take all the extra juices/yogurts and some milks that they will otherwise THROW AWAY to keep in my fridge for my diabetics and even my own kids. All of the wasted food and drinks makes me want to spit.

[AdobeRN]

As I said, all of our meals are free. BUT THIS DRIVES ME CRAZY!!! They make kids get food they know they aren't going to eat. SO wasteful. My diabetic kiddos will pick out what they want and I will write it on a post-it. Mom wants them to stay under 50 carbs, sometimes this means just spaghetti, breadstick, and water. Which to me sounds fine. But they MAKE them get another item. I always tell them not to eat it if we didn't count for it.

In the mornings I go and take all the extra juices/yogurts and some milks that they will otherwise THROW AWAY to keep in my fridge for my diabetics and even my own kids. All of the wasted food and drinks makes me want to spit.

I had the same issue with one of my diabetics - mom ended up getting it in writing from the doctor stating her child was allowed to eat whatever because she was tired of her kid complaining of the harrassment by the cafe staff. Cafe staff would even question me when escorting the student thru the line regarding the food choices - I constantly reminded them that the student was diabetic and mom requested that we try our best to keep carb count within reason - so there were days when the kid couldn't get the fruit side or even a veggie side.

I do the same with all the wasted packaged food that the kids are "required" to purchase to make a healthy meal. I have a basket set up by the tray disposal/trash area in the morning and sometimes at lunch if I am low on snacks - kids now know to drop off unopened milk, juice, cereal - basically anything they had to purchase that is packaged. I keep in my office for those days when kids forget snacks, didn't get here in time for breakfast etc. I get so much that I never need to use my budget or my own money to buy snacks.