Obese children...my rant - page 6

by Gently.me

14,434 Views | 80 Comments

Ok so child comes in with laceration to the hand. 12 years old, about 5'5'' and weighs 260lbs. Big boy. The MD who was suturing was not his PCP, just there to take care of the urgent task. As she wassuturing, the child keeps... Read More


  1. 5
    Ok, I have the tendency to be blunt, and when I say this, I am saying it with love.

    Practicality and common sense does not equal judgement. I am so sick of our culture and the constant implications that "if you dont like it, you MUST hate it". No. I do not hate obese people. I do not hate obese children. I do not hate parents of obese children. I am a nurse, and I believe that nursing is a work of heart.

    It does break my heart however to see people become obese, just like it breaks my heart to see people smoking. These people are setting themselves up for a difficult life, especially when it comes to health. I do understand that there is a lot of emotional stress behind people who are obese, and trust me, I am empathetic. My father got drunk one day and called me fat and ugle when i was 12. I attempted suicide over this 3 years later. I get it.

    Letting yourself (or your children) get to a point where you are obese however, is not ok. In fact, it is selfish. By getting this way, you are depriving yourself and your family from a long and happy life. In fact, since obesity effects the heart(CAD, high BP), stomach (GERD), liver (fatty liver), lungs (asthma, SOB), joints (arthritis), bones (osteoporosis), pancreas (diabetes).... and boy does the list go on, death is probably going to come unexpected and at a young age. How unfair for your family, and for yourself.

    My heart truly does go out to people who are obese. I understand that there is emotional stress behind it, but simply put, it is no excuse. Get help. your family deserves it.....
    CCL RN, leslie :-D, JBudd, and 2 others like this.
  2. 0
    I am pleasantly surprised to see that this is not an obesity thread full of arguments! I'm wondering why that is the case...

    Anyway, my daughter is a self-proclaimed junk food fiend! She is proud. I, on the other hand, am mortified. She shows little self control when it comes to the amount of unhealthy food she should consume. She is not overweight, but has a little bit of a belly. I worry about her when she is not with me (school, frinds' houses, parties, etc) that she does not know when to say when. She is almost 12. I see how her friends are when they come over; they are not craving the sweets like she is.Many of them are content with water to drink, and if I offer them a 'snack' they do not always jump at it, if it is sweet.

    Now, the big question: how did she get this way? I blame 4 people: her parents and her grandparents. I absoultely take 1/4 of the responsibility (her father and I are not together). From an early age, we unfortunately made treats a regular occurence. If they are not used to them, or never had them, they do NOT know what they are missing. She has a least 3 friends who drink water as their primary drink. They are old enough to know that there are other options out there, but have little interest in them.

    Now, we are trying to change our habits, I am trying to model appropriate behaviors (I do not hae a weight problem myslef, but am not getting any younger ). Trying to encourage more activity, and less tv/internet. Healthy snacks and meals (especially breakfast, she would drown herself in carbs if I let her in the morning).

    If I could do it all over again, I would do so much differently. We think it's cute to see a kid with cupcake smushed all over their faces. While i have some friends/family with overweigh kids, they are cute, but the fact that they are short of breath and can't keep up with their peers is not cute at all. And that people make fun of them is incredible sad.
  3. 2
    Quote from nurse educate
    I am pleasantly surprised to see that this is not an obesity thread full of arguments! I'm wondering why that is the case...

    Anyway, my daughter is a self-proclaimed junk food fiend! She is proud. I, on the other hand, am mortified. She shows little self control when it comes to the amount of unhealthy food she should consume. She is not overweight, but has a little bit of a belly. I worry about her when she is not with me (school, frinds' houses, parties, etc) that she does not know when to say when. She is almost 12. I see how her friends are when they come over; they are not craving the sweets like she is.Many of them are content with water to drink, and if I offer them a 'snack' they do not always jump at it, if it is sweet.

    Now, the big question: how did she get this way? I blame 4 people: her parents and her grandparents. I absoultely take 1/4 of the responsibility (her father and I are not together). From an early age, we unfortunately made treats a regular occurence. If they are not used to them, or never had them, they do NOT know what they are missing. She has a least 3 friends who drink water as their primary drink. They are old enough to know that there are other options out there, but have little interest in them.

    Now, we are trying to change our habits, I am trying to model appropriate behaviors (I do not hae a weight problem myslef, but am not getting any younger ). Trying to encourage more activity, and less tv/internet. Healthy snacks and meals (especially breakfast, she would drown herself in carbs if I let her in the morning).

    If I could do it all over again, I would do so much differently. We think it's cute to see a kid with cupcake smushed all over their faces. While i have some friends/family with overweigh kids, they are cute, but the fact that they are short of breath and can't keep up with their peers is not cute at all. And that people make fun of them is incredible sad.
    I wonder if addiction to food is like addiction to alcohol?( yes, i know no where near as severe). but I mean what makes one person be content with a shot of vodka and have a nearly filled bottle in their house for months while another can't walk by it without drinking? Is it the same as someone who can let chips go stale while some people feel the desire to eat everything in sight? Can't say it is all self- control. If you have no desire to go drinking or to the nearest fast food place every hour you are awake, are you really controlling anything?
  4. 0
    It's funny, I was thinking the same thought about an hour ago (while she was trying to negotiate a snack with me). I really think it's a similar thing. Thank God, I cam honestly say I am very content with not indulging in things just because I have access to them. Case in point; vodka and ice cream in the house right now, and no desire for either
  5. 2
    Quote from nurse educate
    I am pleasantly surprised to see that this is not an obesity thread full of arguments! I'm wondering why that is the case...

    Anyway, my daughter is a self-proclaimed junk food fiend! She is proud. I, on the other hand, am mortified. She shows little self control when it comes to the amount of unhealthy food she should consume. She is not overweight, but has a little bit of a belly. I worry about her when she is not with me (school, frinds' houses, parties, etc) that she does not know when to say when. She is almost 12. I see how her friends are when they come over; they are not craving the sweets like she is.Many of them are content with water to drink, and if I offer them a 'snack' they do not always jump at it, if it is sweet.

    Now, the big question: how did she get this way? I blame 4 people: her parents and her grandparents. I absoultely take 1/4 of the responsibility (her father and I are not together). From an early age, we unfortunately made treats a regular occurence. If they are not used to them, or never had them, they do NOT know what they are missing. She has a least 3 friends who drink water as their primary drink. They are old enough to know that there are other options out there, but have little interest in them.

    Now, we are trying to change our habits, I am trying to model appropriate behaviors (I do not hae a weight problem myslef, but am not getting any younger ). Trying to encourage more activity, and less tv/internet. Healthy snacks and meals (especially breakfast, she would drown herself in carbs if I let her in the morning).

    If I could do it all over again, I would do so much differently. We think it's cute to see a kid with cupcake smushed all over their faces. While i have some friends/family with overweigh kids, they are cute, but the fact that they are short of breath and can't keep up with their peers is not cute at all. And that people make fun of them is incredible sad.
    Sounds like me when I was a kid. Now I'm 5'3'' and 250 lbs and I'd call myself a food addict. I'm seeing an eating disorder specialist right now. My advice would be to not make a big deal out of it. DO NOT lecture her. (That's what my parents did.) Don't make her eat differently than her siblings if she has them (my parents lectured me on my 1 slice of pizza while encouraging my brothers to eat as much as they wanted.) Don't bring the junk into the house at all. Learn to make healthy, good tasting snacks. Have her help you shop and make the food. Make it fun. My parents meant well, I know that now, but boy did I resent them when I was a kid. All it made me do was sneak food and binge when I could, while eating healthy around them. Perfect set up for an eating disorder. Good luck! It's gotta be tough, especially as the mother of a girl.:redpinkhe
    CCL RN and Not_A_Hat_Person like this.
  6. 3
    anotherone:
    You're right - ramen noodles are cheap everywhere in the US, and they are also HIGH IN FAT! Read the nutrition information on the package. In addition to being high in fat, the seasoning packet contains a TON of MSG. People are what they eat - garbage in, garbage out. If you only eat nutritionally deficient high-fat food, you will be a nutritionally deficient, high-fat person. So thank you for proving my point.
  7. 1
    There was just a piece on NPR (commies! liberal hippies!) about willpower and how to increase it. Also, about cupcakes, which is more interesting to many of us. Basically, you have so much banked for the day, so be aware of how and when you use it, but if you use it often, you can strengthen it. Imma give it a try. Tomorrow.
    CCL RN likes this.
  8. 0
    Quote from nurse educate
    vodka and ice cream in the house right now, and no desire for either

    I see the words ...
  9. 3
    It is such complex issue and needs to be tackled on may levels if we are ever going to beat it (couseling, exercise, education, restriction from crap foods).

    It is not just calories in calories out (yes physiologically, but not emotionally and in many other ways).

    Having been a fat kid back in the day when I was the only fat kid in my class (70's) I really feel for these kids. Although it is common now and doesn't cause as much exclusion I fear what will happen to all these kids with high BP and other related issues in their 20's and 30's. Will they have the health issues of those in their 60s and 70s?

    I have managed to maintain (more or less) at 155 to 165 for the last 20+ years after being 235 in my 20's, but only through strict weight management and a commitment to intense exercise that requires me to be fully invovled in the battle every day of my life and having spent way more mental energy on it than I would ever have wished.

    I feel sorry for the parents who are trying to fight their childs battle without harming their self esteem and totally PO'd at the parents who just will not change their families food intake for the better when their is so obviously a problem because they like the junk or despite education just cannot be bothered to implement changes.
  10. 1
    Quote from mya612
    anotherone:
    You're right - ramen noodles are cheap everywhere in the US, and they are also HIGH IN FAT! Read the nutrition information on the package. In addition to being high in fat, the seasoning packet contains a TON of MSG. People are what they eat - garbage in, garbage out. If you only eat nutritionally deficient high-fat food, you will be a nutritionally deficient, high-fat person. So thank you for proving my point.
    Yes your lab values might be out of control but that doesn't mean you will be obese.
    Not_A_Hat_Person likes this.


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