Sucky weekend - page 3

We managed to lose 3 babies this weekend. Saturday: 38 week IUFD. Saturday: 36 week Trisomy 18. Baby made it to about 24 hours old before she passed in her mother's arms. Sunday: 40 week... Read More

  1. by   just1rn
    ((((Heather)))) Gosh?!?!?!? Ob can really suck sometimes. Thinking of you and hope you are doing OK!
  2. by   SmilingBluEyes
    HEY WHAT'S WRONG WITH RED HAIR HUH HUH HUH??????????????????????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????? (sorry i just had to say that. ).......OB is happy 99.9% of the time...it's that 0.1 percent that will get you.....won't it?
  3. by   Dr. Kate
    And we had a 10 month old SIDS death this weekend. It sounds like a bad weekend was had in many places.
    But three, hugs to you for keeping it together, and for not slapping someone who really deserved it.
  4. by   oramar
    Oh take care of yourself Heather. Stuff like this takes a long time to get over. I can't believe anyone who has a healthy infant that is in all ways normal could find anything on the planet to complain about. However, some people are just so inexperienced about what life can send our way that they don't appreciate their blessings. I remember when my daughter was 18 months and getting very active and into things. I was complaining about her being so active. Her doctor feared she might have a very mild undiagnosed hip displasia so he sent her to ped bone specialist. Happended that this guy specialized in spina bifida. My daughter was the only child in the place that could walk. She ran about on her happy little feet her little shoe bells tinkeling with every step. There were children on crutches, in wheelchairs and dragging themselves around the floor. I suddenly realized God had sent me there to shut my complaining mouth. Oh by the way, she was fine, is fine, it was just a precautionary thing.
  5. by   emily_mom
    What the hell's wrong with red hair? I woulda b!tchslapped her twice. Once from me, once from you, and once from my adorable red head. Oh wait, that's three times. Finals stress kicking in.

    So sorry to hear that you lost 3 babies. Where I work, it's mainly all high risk, so we have a lot of bad days like that. Never get used to it though. I think if I did, I would have to leave OB.

    This time of year, I can't help but think of all the families that expected these little bundles for X-mas. Makes it all the more sad.

    Keep your chin up. There will be better days ahead!

    Kristy
  6. by   OBNURSEHEATHER
    Thank you all for being so wonderful and supportive! I worked yesterday in the nursery, a welcome variation from the floor and the families. I was out on the floor for a minute to tube some blood to blood bank when one of my coworkers was discharging that horrible patient. Even on the way onto the elevator, she was complaining about that baby.

    "Her eyelashes aren't as long and full as my son's were. Will they grow?"

    I think it's a farggin shame that anyone can breed.

    Heather
  7. by   deespoohbear
    Just tell that witch to send her little girl my way!! I would love to have a baby, no matter what color hair they had or what their eyelashes looked like. What an ungrateful little b_tch!!
  8. by   semstr
    she can give thqt baby to me right now, I would even get on a plane to get it!!
    Sorry, Heather, how do you feel today? Do you have possibilities to talk about this at work? Like supervision or something? Hope so!!
    Take care, Renee
  9. by   illeniccup
    Well, Heather, first let me send you a huge hug with wishes for good pt. outcomes. I am not a nurse now, but plan on being one someday--preferably in OB...I often wonder how I will do with the negatives that come with this specialty--they seem particularly heartbreaking. OB nurses I've talked with say the good experiences far outweigh the bad : ) Good luck to you; you and your unit could use a break...
  10. by   baseline
    "well it's become a tradition then" and walked out. So I'm waiting to see if they complain" PRICELESS!!!! Quick thinking!

    Heather.......gosh...I can't think of one thing to say.........all past evidence to the contrary......

    Seriously....big hugs.....and a big cocktail ... or two. (sunnygirls buying). :-(
  11. by   baseline
    Oh...and that so-called Mom...............? I have a friend who would love to take that baby............red hair....brown hair......no hair........
  12. by   mark_LD_RN
    Sorry you had such a bad strech Heather. I know the feeling all to well, I quit doing OB nursing for a year not long ago because i had 3 39 to 40 week IUFD in 3 days all in a row. It really sucked, I find OB happy most of the time but when it is bad it is really really bad.

    I spent yesterday (christmas eve) with on of my private patients when she arrived at the hospital they could not get hrt tones on baby, needless to say it was not a very nice christmas.


    Hang in there heather don't let it get to you to much, there are plenty of other patient's that need your help.
  13. by   OB/GYN NP
    Sorry, Heather. That just sucks. And it's never better at any time of the year, but you know that those poor patients will never feel the same about Christmas-time again. It will always bring back bad memories. We can only hope that time will heal all wounds.

    I have a quick story, if you all want to read for a couple more minutes. I'll never forget the first time I cared for a patient with an IUFD. She was one who had a perfectly healthy baby until 39 week prenatal check, when they found no FHT's. So sad. She was admitted shortly thereafter for induction, she and hubby still in shock. She was really angry about doing everything right, taking PN vit's, non-smoker, took excellent care of herself, and how could this happen? I cried with them despite my best efforts to feel sympathy without growing too close to the situation as to lose my objectivity.

    My patient the very next night was exactly like my patient the prior night, but with a healthy live baby girl, who was welcomed into the world with the most perfect laboring and birthing experience anyone could hope for. It served to remind me that people have to go through tough things that even we can't understand, but L&D always offers us a tomorrow that can be so much brighter. There will always be tomorrow, and next week, and next month, when the happy times FAR outweigh the bad ones. I've never forgotten the contrast of those two nights with such dissimilar outcomes. It's a constant reminder of the hope that lies beyond today.

    The couple who had the stillborn was back a year later. I got to care for them again in labor. A healthy baby boy for them the second time around...and only tears of joy. Somehow those old memories just slipped away as they held their healthy baby in their arms and thanked God for a chance to have a healthy baby. I cried with them again, and didn't even try to maintain my objectivity...

close