13yr olds having babies. - page 5
I caught myself saying what any parent does not my child. I took my 13 yr old to the doctor yesturday & found out she may be about 4mnths pregnant. I do not let her run the streets, I take her to... Read More
Mar 23, '04I am so sorry to hear about your daughter. Mine is 15 yrs old and I am constantly worried about this happening to her. Especially, since I was a teenage mother myself 15 years ago. Whatever you do don't blame yourself. It sounds like you did everything you could do to warn your daughter about these things. She made this decision and there is nothing you could have done to change her mind about this. Now you must look forward. Be there for your daughter and baby. Go to classes with her on child birth. Encourage her to stay in school. Help her financially if needed. But most of all show her that you will stand behind her and that you are not ashamed of her. Encourage her to finish school and go to college for the welfare of her baby.
Mar 23, '04Child birth classes...oh my that brings back memories for me.....I was 22, when I found out I was preg....my bf of just over a year...the one who had JUST began talking MARRIAGE...left me the moment he found out. My mom was AWESOME...supportive, loving and absolutely then and now..."my ROCK!" My dr REQUIRED childbirth classes...and they were HORRIBLE. I was the only single mom in a room w/ 7 other young married couples, I cried thru them...I felt so JUDGED by them.
then came the day my instructor called me to say she'd found another single mom for our group. Sure....one who was 18 and having her THIRD child ..she didn't know who the father was and didn't care.. it was AWFUL...I refused to go back after that.
So definitely ...if she's going to go to the classes...find one that has other girls in her situation...anthing else is agony!
Mar 23, '04You are in my thoughts and prayers!1 Have worked in OB w/ some really young girls -- so many were devestated by the lack of love and support they were getting from family members. Glad to see you are supportive and that you are concerned about her.
Encourage you to find out specifics and to get counseling for the whole family. Some tough decisions ahead....be there for her!! Love her to pieces -- whatever ya'all decide!! Keep us posted -- we care!
Mar 23, '04I have started this response twice because I really don't know what words to use. My heart goes out to your family, including that precious grandbaby you have not met yet. This will be the most important parenting you have ever done for your daughter, by supporting her and teaching her to take care of herself. She will learn a lot this year. I hope she learns that a mother's love is unconditional, even when a painful situation presents itself. Keep us posted.
Mar 23, '04I continue to hold you & yours in my thoughts & prayers. Remember what Mary, mother of Jesus, must have felt being unmarried, a child with child in a culture that would have stoned her to death has she not had the support of her loved ones. That grandbaby may be our future leader or future healer, so hold that in your heart as you await his coming. Peace be with you.
Mar 27, '04Actually, I was going to ask the same thing. LilTiger71 hasn't been back since she posted this. Maybe she found this BB and was unloading.
LilTiger71, if you are still out there, you are still in my prayers. I visit this forum frequently and every time I see your original post, I pray for you. If you feel like it, please get back to us and let us know how your family is doing. Until then, you are in my thoughts and prayers.
*hugs* and love to you,
Mar 28, '04Quote from mtnmomOh, how terrible.
When I care for young girls like this having babies it breaks my heart. They are babies having babies.
I am not getting into the abortion debate hopefully but I am very worried about abortion as a solution here. Too much potential for long-term psychological guilt and damage, especially for such a young girl. True, the birth will be traumatic ...but I personally would not advocate abortion for this girl unless it is a case of incest or rape.
I agree wholeheartedly with those of you who think there is more to this story than meets the eye. Seduction or rape is a real possiblity. Where is the school in all of this? Do they know about this and what is their response?
Hugs and prayers to OP and her DD (and prayers for the baby)
Are any of us immune from this type of thing? I keep the lines of communication open with my 14 year old; she has a strong religious faith and strong values, and I know who her friends are....but any of that could change. I can't become complacent and let my guard down for one minute.
I understand that having an abortion as a teenager can be traumatic, as I had one. But carrying a baby for nine months and having to give it away, even to a loving home can be just as traumatic. There are sometimes just no good choices to make. God Bless...