Matt Lauer Fired due to Inappropriate Sexual Behavior. Has This Happened to You?

debiklages, MSN, RN · Nov 30, 2017

I have been a victim of sexual abuse in the workplace. This pattern has to stop. I have two sons and one daughter and I hope that I have raised them well. But the sad fact is that I have had to raise my daughter to be very cautious about being around men. Men don't have the same experiences of unwanted sexual advances as women do and when it does happen it is a very rare experience. I think that we can all thank the current president of the USA for the current awareness of sexual impropriety. Enough is finally enough it would seem.

Axgrinder · Nov 30, 2017

About 15 years ago a I worked at a VA hospital - a PCT fondled me while I was busy performing patient care on a restrained, sedated patient. I didn't even hear him enter the room. WTH?!?

I was so angry I couldn't even speak. I was stunned too. I never could figure out why he did it. Opportunity?

Later he came to me worried (good! Should have thought of that before he had done something so out of line). Wanted to know: Had he done something to upset me somehow? Say what????

Damned right you did! How slimy was that?!?

I told my boss - because he was a veteran he got a reprimand. Reassigned to a nonpatient care area. Nepotism at it's finest.

wannabeny · Nov 30, 2017

Yes. I'm a survivor of childhood molestation by a stepparent.Worked on the racetrack from 17 - 28; if I had a dollar for every unwanted sexual advance that was made, I would make Bill Gates look like a pauper. That entitled mentality is dangerous.

Due to my history, I have zero problem opening up my mouth and putting someone in their place in any setting regardless of audience, and have gladly laid my hands on a person who just doesn't get the principle of "my body, NOT yours." I learned very early on there are two types of people (1) those who like to carry out such sexual improprieties, and (2) those who stand back, watch, and sweep it under the rug. I've met very few that seem to have a big enough moral compass to stand up to such behavior.

I'm sure there were many other instances that led up to him being fired in what seemed like an abrupt manner. I've not worked in many other industries, but I did not encounter much when I worked in the hospitality industry. They seemed a bit more on the ball when it comes to quickly nipping that sort of behavior in the bud.

RNperdiem, RN · Nov 30, 2017

I hope the harassers are learning that the old rules of silence are on the way out.

Elvish, BSN, DNP, RN, NP · Nov 30, 2017

Very important detail that I feel needs brought up here:
He was fired for inappropriate behavior. While sexual harassment would fall under this umbrella statement, many other things do too. As the video states, details have not been released and, he violated company standards. It doesn't say rape, harassment or anything lewd went on.
I'm getting the impression that this was not harassment, but something consensual that violated company policies regarding employees dating each other et etc.....

There is video evidence that it was, in fact, lewd behavior, and not anything consensual.

allnurses Guide · Nov 30, 2017

While I have been approached by men in a manner that was inappropriate. I can't say I've ever been harassed. Harassment being defined as a continuous and sustained course of conduct which annoys, threatens, intimidates, alarms, or puts a person in fear of their safety. Way before my nursing days when I was in my early 20's I had a boss come up behind me and grasp my elbow in a vey intimate way so that his fingers were touching my breast. I didn't even look at him but I said "You need to remove your hand from my elbow or I'll tear your arm off and beat you to death with it!" I worked there for a couple of year after that. It was an otherwise good job for a college student. I never had any problems with that boss after said incident because I shut it down immediately when it happened. IMHO bullies, harassers, and predators seek out people they perceive to be weak or easy prey. While no woman should have to deal with such advances we have the power to shut it down. My mother used to say that men get away with exactly what the women in their lives allow.

Please do not misconstrue my statements to mean that I think women deserve these advances - They do not.

Hppy

Ruby Vee, BSN · Nov 30, 2017

I'm not in nursing, I am male and have been sexually harassed by both female and males in the workplace back in the 90s. Then and perhaps now it's not something a male can goto HR or complain about because you would not be taken seriously and or you would be looked down upon for complaining about it. It's very much a double standard that is not fair.
My wife (a nurse) has been what I would deem sexually harassed (verbal comments, body part grabbing) at work by patients as well as physically assaulted. Management blows this off as well...
She has been verbally and physically assaulted in the workplace by co workers as well. One issue could have involved police and pressed charges but if she had gone that way it would have ended her career.

You are absolutely right -- a double standard is unfair. However, what you describe as a double standard is not actually a double standard. In the 90s, if a female complained to HR about sexual harassment, they were not taken seriously and were looked down upon for complaining about it. I don't think you get that.

NanaPoo · Nov 30, 2017

I've always been a Matt Lauer fan and hoped these allegations weren't true. It turns out he's an absolute creep.

Matt Lauer Accused of Sexual Harassment by Multiple Women (EXCLUSIVE) – Variety

bgxyrnf, MSN, RN · Nov 30, 2017

I'm a 50-sumthn guy and I can honestly say that I have never behaved this way toward women but I have in the past participated in talk with other guys which I now consider completely inappropriate and which helps foster the male attitude that makes some guys think that this is acceptable behavior.

Probably the inflection point in my evolving attitude was the birth of my now late-teen daughter and starting to look at things through a father's eyes... that and simply growing up.

The change that has happened with me is that now I feel a responsibility to confront the inappropriate behavior, whether women are around or not.

bgxyrnf, MSN, RN · Nov 30, 2017

I am male and have been sexually harassed by both female and males in the workplace back in the 90s. Then and perhaps now it's not something a male can goto HR or complain about because you would not be taken seriously and or you would be looked down upon for complaining about it. It's very much a double standard that is not fair.

Admittedly it's not fair but the scope of the problem is many orders of magnitude greater when directed toward the paired X's compared to the XY's and hence a much higher priority.

Apple-Core, ASN, BSN, RN · Nov 30, 2017

I worked at an unnamed facility in 2002 - I worked in the ICU at the time and had a CNA come up behind me one day while I was titrating vasopressors and squeezed my breast out if the blue. I couldn't have been more shocked even if he had spit in my face instead.
Apparently this particular man had been there since God wore knee pants, and he had also been doing this for years and years. None of the other woman had reported it, but spoke amongst themselves.
I reported it.
He wasn't fired - he was instead moved to stepdown 200 yards down the hall where I ran into him daily. In fact, I ran into him all over the hospital: elevators, on the grounds, parking lot, cafeteria ...
A click of nurses on the unit were angry that I "got him in trouble" (I believe he did that all on his own) and I was ostracized by this group. It was awful.
The union got involved - made all sorts of promises, but administration eventually told them to cease and desist ... they did. Because of the type of facility it was there was no was no winning.
He continued working until retirement. I left disgusted.

And this is the very reason people are scared to report such gross behavior. I really feel for you...being ostracized at work is a horrible feeling.

beekee · Nov 30, 2017

Admittedly it's not fair but the scope of the problem is many orders of magnitude greater when directed toward the paired X's compared to the XY's and hence a much higher priority.

Men have just as much of a right to not be harassed, assaulted or raped as women do. The gender of the perpetrators and the victims does not matter. It all needs to end. It's not too much to ask to feel safe at work (or school, the bus, home, or anywhere else you might want to venture).