You Know You're A Nurse If...

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You know you're a nurse if...

You've been telling stories in a restaurant and had someone at another table throw up.

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Specializes in PICU.

I call my report sheet my "brain". I have been known to be seen running all over the building lookin for my "brain" which is where I put my patients vital signs on!!

Lol me too!!!!!

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Specializes in Medsurg/ICU, Mental Health, Home Health.
I have no idea what I would do with anything that big.

That's what she said! ;)

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After major back surgey,you tell your nurse " give me the 10cc syring I'll take my own catheter out"

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Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

you can discuss almost any topic or question that comes up whever you happen to be.

ex. two md neighbors, one nurse wife and i discussed a new surgical procedure during a play intermission without ever leaving our seats.

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Specializes in Critical Care Transport/Intensive Care/Management.

That's what she said! ;)

LOL! Too funny.

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you believe tylenol, advil, or excedrin provides a large part of your daily calorie intake requirements.

you believe every waiting room should have a valium salt lick.

you believe the problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

you believe the pain will go away when it stops hurting.

you don't get excited about blood loss unless it's your own.

anything that can go wrong, will go wrong and if nothing has gone wrong, you obviously don't understand the situation.

you've ever had a patient with a nose ring, a brow ring and twelve earrings say, "i'm afraid of shots."

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When you wear your scrubs on your day off. lol thinking you work

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Specializes in maternal child, public/community health.

Your 2 1/2 year old, after climbing under the table at the restaraunt to get a dropped toy, says, "I need hand 'tizer. I have germs now."

Your 4 year old gets a scratch on his hand. When you say, "Guess we'll have to cut it off so it doesn't hurt anymore," his response is, "You mean AMPUTATE?? No Way!"

(from my grandson - his mom and grammy are nurses!)

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Specializes in Trauma, Teaching.

You are in your martial arts class, and tell the kid in front of you "go ahead and attack, I wrestle 200 lb drunks every night"

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You are at story time with your kid listening to a funny book about a girl with volume control issues and all you can think about is why hasn't anyone checked her ears!?

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Specializes in Emergency.

on days off when someone asks you what time it is and instead of looking at your wrist you look at your chest/hip for your fob watch...

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Specializes in Psych.

When you pack two main course for your lunch. One that has to be eaten while sitting and the other one that you can inhale in a few seconds without risking death by burnt mouth.

When your husband is whining about his bad day and you reply- Could your bad day result in somones death? If not suck it up.

It is totally normal to look at the phone, decide if you are going to go in early/extra or not before answering, if you answer at all.

No blood, no bones, no Altered level of consciousness, No trip to ER/Doctor needed

and the best one

Can have 300 lb psychotic patients listen to what you say and follow directions, yet your six yr old just ignores you.

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