Struggling with depression, panic and anxiety.

DutchgirlRN, ASN, RN · Oct 20, 2007

I certainly woulnd't want people not to post because one might think it's not a dibilitating disease...IMO that would only add to the shame that guilts many who are struggling with disorders of this kind. I personally find it healing to read comforting posts and look at information pasted on posts. I agree have your wife join in this "non-threatening" "non-shameful" environment and as an added plus get some laugh therapy in there too. Anyone else?

I would never advocate someone not posting because I don't think it's a debilitating disease. It definately can be disabling but it is not a disability IMO.

I "suffered" and I do mean "suffered" crippling depression/anxiety/panic for years. I missed 3 years of high school and had to have a homebound teacher. It is a chemical imbalance that needs to be treated chemically and with talk therapy. I also said IMHO. To each his own. There is loads of info on allnurse re: depression/anxiety/panic and it can be very beneficial to know you are not alone. I never knew that because as a teenager in the 70's we didn't discuss mental illness and I was the crazy person in the family who no one could understand. "Just snap out of it girl", we didn't have SSRI's, my parents certainly were not going to take me to a psychiatrist. What a shameful thing that would be to take your daughter to a shrink. My friends all deserted me because there was something wrong with me.

Does anyone know what courage it took for me to go back to school my Junior year, stay in school and graduate with those same friends. It wasn't easy but I know I'm a stronger and better person for having done it and I did it totally chemical free. As an educated adult who can now make my own decisions, I take advantage of SSRI's and talk therapy. It has changed my life dramatically. I did fairy well from age 16-35 but I've been dynamite since officially diagnosed with major depression and anxiety disorder at age 35. I'm now 52 y/o and happily celebrating the fact that I am not crazy after all!

sharona97, BSN, RN · Oct 20, 2007

I'm sorry for what you'e gone through in your past. But unfortunetly there are some who are on SSDI due to PTSD/Anxiety?depression, etc. I did note your IMHO quote. I'm simply giving my opinion and experience in this arena. As the OP stated his wife is worried about ever being able to work again. There is merit to those feelings, and the posters on this bb I believe have ackowledged that.

DutchgirlRN, ASN, RN · Oct 20, 2007

I'm sorry for what you'e gone through in your past. But unfortunetly there are some who are on SSDI due to PTSD/Anxiety?depression, etc. I did note your IMHO quote. I'm simply giving my opinion and experience in this arena. As the OP stated his wife is worried about ever being able to work again. There is merit to those feelings, and the posters on this bb I believe have ackowledged that.

I had PTSD too. Believe me I had it all. I worried was I ever going to be able to live. I certainly understand her concern about ever working again. Her situation deserves merit, her feelings deserve mertit, I can sympathasize because I have been through it and I can truly understand the situation. I just think it's not a disability like losing a leg. While disabling it is still a medical condition.

SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN · Oct 20, 2007

I just think it's not a disability like losing a leg. While disabling it is still a medical condition.

?

My sister has schizophrenia. I'd certainly call that a disability.

leslie :-D · Oct 20, 2007

My wife is an RN, returning to work after several physical struggles. In the midst of these, she has been hit with depression and anxiety/panic, and it seems to be destroying her life. She's unable to go to work without having a panic attack and just gave up her full time job. At home, she just sits or sleeps all day, and feels bad because she can't seem to do anything else. She's currently taking meds, but nothing seems to help. Does it get better than this?

your wife sounds immobilized with fear.

this goes way beyond the normal response to fear/anxiety.

and since it is disabling her, to me, it is a disability.

she needs to get to a reputable psychiatrist and get on the proper meds.

she also needs counselling.

this is not a matter of "i'm scared, therefore i can't go to work".

rather, these are mental responses that are paralyzing her.

please get her the help she needs.

let us know how you both do?

best of everything.

leslie

DutchgirlRN, ASN, RN · Oct 20, 2007

Ok, Ok, I give up. Leslie is my rock. Thanks leslie.

While I personally as stated "IMHO" don't feel like depression belongs in a nurses with disabilities thread I do see your point as well. I was paralyzed with fear but to me IMHO it was an illness. Yes it definately disabled me from living my life but it was IMHO an illness.

It's kinda like, what came first the chicken or the egg? Does that make sense? Maybe a dozen or 1/2 a dozen x 2 = the same? Good grief now I am sounding like I'm crazy but I'm not just temporarily stupid.

SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN · Oct 20, 2007

It's kinda like, what came first the chicken or the egg? Does that make sense? Maybe a dozen or 1/2 a dozen x 2 = the same? Good grief now I am sounding like I'm crazy but I'm not just temporarily stupid.

I know the feeling.

steelcityrn, RN · Oct 20, 2007

Lots of good ideas here. Just wanted to add a suggestion that you make sure she knows its ok to not work at this time. Encourage her to take the stress off of herself. Many nurses take a sabatacal, as do other professions. Do you have any pets? They are great to have and spend time with. See if she and a friend can join yoga or exercise classes. Ask her if there is anything she has not had time for that she would like to try, and you would attend the first few times with her if she wanted you to be there. I am amazed at how many people later in life take painting, art clases and music. Basically as you know, there is no coming out of depression quickly. And telling someone they have everything to live for or they have it all never works. She has to sort things out as to why she has this and how she can begin to lift out of this place, and thats going to take time and require much patience. Best of luck and its good to see someone who cares so much about their spouse.

leslie :-D · Oct 20, 2007

Ok, Ok, I give up. Leslie is my rock. Thanks leslie.
While I personally as stated "IMHO" don't feel like depression belongs in a nurses with disabilities thread I do see your point as well. I was paralyzed with fear but to me IMHO it was an illness. Yes it definately disabled me from living my life but it was IMHO an illness.
It's kinda like, what came first the chicken or the egg? Does that make sense? Maybe a dozen or 1/2 a dozen x 2 = the same? Good grief now I am sounding like I'm crazy but I'm not just temporarily stupid.

i'm enjoying your brief moment of insanity. :icon_hug:

i see what you're saying.

most depressions will not interfere w/normal functions of life.

sure, you may experience overall dysthymia, and lose interest in different activities.

but still, most are able to continue w/their job.

it turns into a disability when it interferes with your adl's, i.e., family, job, friendships.

i've been where this woman is, also.

and even when you reach the point of becoming restless and wanting more, your home has become a very safe haven, from the terrifying world out there.

it is such a journey back to 'normalcy'.

and i initially started with a psychiatrist who overmedicated me soooooo badly.

that's why i emphasized getting someone reputable.

i wasn't aware of the damage he had done, but my family certainly was, as well as my therapist.

now that i see a wonderfully competent np, i can only appreciate how bad off i was with the other.

there is so much i could elaborate on re: this thread- it doesn't matter if it's anxiety, depression, panic attacks, ptsd.

they all overlap and have similiar presentations.

where this woman is now, is headed towards the more severe type.

my heart and prayers are with you both.

leslie

markjrn · Oct 21, 2007

i'm enjoying your brief moment of insanity. :icon_hug:
i see what you're saying.
most depressions will not interfere w/normal functions of life.
sure, you may experience overall dysthymia, and lose interest in different activities.
but still, most are able to continue w/their job.
it turns into a disability when it interferes with your adl's, i.e., family, job, friendships.
i've been where this woman is, also.
and even when you reach the point of becoming restless and wanting more, your home has become a very safe haven, from the terrifying world out there.
it is such a journey back to 'normalcy'.
and i initially started with a psychiatrist who overmedicated me soooooo badly.
that's why i emphasized getting someone reputable.
i wasn't aware of the damage he had done, but my family certainly was, as well as my therapist.
now that i see a wonderfully competent np, i can only appreciate how bad off i was with the other.
there is so much i could elaborate on re: this thread- it doesn't matter if it's anxiety, depression, panic attacks, ptsd.
they all overlap and have similiar presentations.
where this woman is now, is headed towards the more severe type.
my heart and prayers are with you both.
leslie

My wife has been reading this thread with interest, and Leslie, your post really hit home with her - she can really relate to what you're saying. Hopefully she's not headed for the more severe type of anything, although her status seems pretty severe now, at least to us.

Her psych is the head of te department, and flies in from Boston twice a week to see patients. It's an odd arrangement, but we hope he's good. He seems intelligent and doesn't seem to jump to over-medicate. He's talking about adding a drug to enhance her antidepressant and we don't know what that is yet.

I hope there's a way out of this for her. Thanks for the words of support. :)

markjrn · Oct 21, 2007

Thanks to everyone who responded. :)

I think this IS a disability, at least it's totally screwing with my wife's ADL's and she feels disabled.

She says sometimes it feels like fear, but I guess that's what panic attacks are - fight or flight kicks in, and that's a fear response. She went through hell in nursing school, and I'm wondering now if that's why she's having panic attacks at work. She went through nursing school years ago and had above satisfactory evaluations and grades, but was hounded and harassed by instructors. I wonder about PTSD, but I'm no psych guy so I don't know.

Anyways, I'm just worried and rambling now. Thanks for the encouragement everyone.

Tweety, BSN, RN · Oct 22, 2007

I think it's probably best to keep this discussion in this forum. Depression can and can not be disabling, the same as back pain or MS. We don't necessarily for have forum for those functioning with these problems.

Anyway, I understand the crippling kind of dispression. In the 80's I was so depressed I couldn't function, didn't bathe, shave, do laundry, or even leave my bedroom. I contemplated suicide often and attempted twice. Everything took a tremendous amount of effort. My body ached with the depression. I also have panic attacks in public on occasion, where I would just totally freak and be paralyzed with fear.

Time, medication, therapy, in-paitent hospitalization, self-help books, support of loved ones and friends (more friends as family didn't know what to do) and diet and excercise eventually got me to a point where I could take baby steps. Eventually I went to nursing school and after a year was able to get off medications.

I do hope your dear wife finds hope and a tiny spark of light and goes towards that. It's sometimes a long day's journey into night, but the sun always shines after the night. Been there and done that and am on the other side and I haven't had to go back, although there have been some down times in the years since, nothing like that awful time.

Hang in there.