Soft spoken nurses

[BSNbeauty]

I usually don't get offended if someone asks me to repeat what I said. I have a soft voice and I'm used it. I cannot deepen my voice to save my life, however I do make an effort to project when I'm talking to others, especially at work.

The issue is that there is one Dr at work that consistently complains about my voice. Everyone at work can hear me perfectly except her. The other day she embarrassed be so bad that another nurse pulled me aside and stated that I need to confront her about what she did.

I just blew it off, but now I'm thinking that I need to confront her and nip this in the bud. She consistently belittles me in front of others and I know it needs to stop.

Any advice or comebacks is much appreciated.

[damrcngrl95]

I had an instructor try to belittle me because of my soft voice. I had a very elderly patient that he made me wake up. She was also the very first patient I had ever had. I found out a couple of days later that she was disoriented on a good day and I can only imagine being awakened out of the blue. I was speaking how I felt loudly. Later, the instructor started mumbling and whispering to me. I told him that I was sorry, but I can't understand him. He said, "you didn't like that did you?" Before in realized it, I told him that at least my quiet voice isn't on purpose or being mean. I did later tell him that I will work very hard to project my voice and then made a joke out of how quiet I am. One of the other students who had a loud voice had the same elderly patient. He had a very hard time getting her to understand him. I also didn't have any problems with my other patients. Even the elderly ones. Some people just have issues. I would probably say something that points out how she's acting rude and then make a joke about how she can't ever hear you and laugh it off when you see her. Humor does a lot to smooth over tense situations.

[amberella123]

Tell her.

Yessss.

Haha no! Don't say that. But it would be reallllly funny.

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

How does this doctor interact with other nurses? If she is a jerk across the board, call her on it. If the other nurses admire her.. she is trying to help you to garner the respect YOU deserve.

Soft spoken is not going to get you anywhere in nursing... speak up!

[sallyrnrrt, ADN, RN]

[ATTACH=CONFIG]12825[/ATTACH]

oh yea , this would work

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

It is sometimes difficult for people to hear with all of the backround noise. Additionally, I think most nurses attempt to use a "theraputic tone of voice" with patients and each other, as to the many times that one or another is disciplined for speaking too loudly and others overhearing.

The behavior of belittling is never professional. I would say that you are willing to communicate with this MD in a way that benefits both of you, and ulitmately the patient. Maybe write down all of the things you need to ask the MD about (orders, advising about labs, whatever it is) and let her review it. Because so many MD's are in and out of our unit, we have a sheet that is on a clipboard for each MD. On it is a "request list". Then the MD can grab it, review it, discuss it if need be. If there is verbal communication that needs to happen, then I would make sure that with this particular MD, you are in almost yelling tone (yelling for you). This doesn't excuse the MD's bad unprofessinal behaviors, however, the bottom line is you need something from the MD for your patient. Lots of wasted time with "I can't HEAR you" stuff that escalates before you know it.

Being soft spoken is not a bad thing, however, you need to think about how you can assert yourself verbally at work. In any situation, this could be to your benefit if you can learn how to make your voice a higher volume when you need to.

A perhaps off the wall suggestion, however, food for thought--many adult ed schools have a course in public speaking. I found it helpful, as to not quote a Seinfeld episode, I was a LOUD talker. It was jarring to people. In taking a public speaking class, which was so much fun, I learned to control my voice. Pretty cool stuff.

If this MD is a jerk, she's a jerk and will find just about anything to belittle others about. Not sure how to change that behavior, but you can change your reaction to it.

[BrandonLPN, LPN]

Just call her "Dr Belltone" until she gets the hint.

[llg, PhD, RN]

Without knowing the details, we can't know to what degree she was truly "bullying" (a label that shouldn't be used lightly) and to what degree she was just letting her irritation show and it hit a nerve with you. If the "belittling" was a 1-time event, I would probably let it go and give her the benefit of the doubt. But if it is a repeated behavior, I would definitely address it. Enlist the help of some of your collegues who know her (and you) as to the approach that would be most likely to be successul with her.