Quote from psu_213
Why is that people are assuming that the nurse in the OP got up from her Facebook and went in to be rude the family member? Maybe she was just in a code involving a 6 year old patient that ended poorly. On her way to talk with the child's family she was confronted by the family member who wanted to get on her case about wait time. Perhaps the code was still in progress and she was going to get the other family so that they could be there and be updated on the situation. No, she shouldn't have said the bit about bleeding and the infection, but there is a good chance what got perceived as rude was just a manifestation of coming from a situation that emotionally wore her out. If she was rude, ok, shame on her. However, there may be a whole lot more to the situation that just she isn't compassionate and that she lacks empathy. Haven't you encountered a similar situation during your time in the ER?
I acknowledged, more than once, that we/I were/was not there. All I am saying is strive to be respectful of all people--even if you feel they haven't earned it. I have seen patients escalate something fierce, b/c nurses didn't learn to keep it short but respectful and then go do what they have to do. You can't take the stuff that comes from patients and families personally.
Yes, right. The bit about bleeding, etc, was silly. I feel like it's a little discernment on my part to see a lack of maturity and an attitude in that reply. I mean if you are busy coding, at least when I have been, I could give two craps what people are saying. By that I mean, I may respectfully and briefly reply, and then I keep moving. If I am moving and concentrating on the code, I don't allow my mind to be crowded by nonsense. This interferes with doing the best I can and my thinking. But you don't have to get up on some pedalstool about bleeding and/or infection, yada, yada. Frankly, I don't have time for that if I am coding someone. Immediately life-threatening short of an advanced directive kind of trumps everything else. To the families, as Esme said, those other families/patients may not understand that. You can only be brief and respectful and keep moving. If you are a nurse and have time to deal with them, than as a nurse professional having been educated in being supportive and active listening, you should. Don't argue or tell them things they can't relate to. Share that their loved one or they would receive the same priority level treament if they were in imminent risk of dying within a matter of minutes. Tell them that someone will see and treat their loved one or them as soon as they are freed up from other crises. But if this is the case, and then they see people laughing and carrying on with BS, don't blame them for being ******, period.
I can't speak for anyone else, but when I am in a code, I focus in on what I am doing for the patient and to help the team at that particular moment. I block everything else out. That's kind of the mode you have to function in at that moment, and you deal with other things after. But in doing so, I am not going to be unduly short with people. You can easily make an already bad situation worse in such an area or situation. Please don't add to it with needlessly disrespectful or curt comments. They aren't going back into the code room or area with you.
We have coded kids in bays in front of other families, and while they were moved away or the situation was contained with curtains, most of the time, the families could see we were doing everything in our power to help the child that was coding. At least I have never had a patient complain about the non-lifethreatening needs of their kids while we were cracking a chest open on a kid on the other side of the bay. Hell, if they had asked for something inane, I probably wouldn't have heard it or processesd it in the midst of the code. But when others jump in or are doing stuff, and I am no longer needed in the immediate, I have addressed the concerns of others and those patients. Why wouldn't I? If enough hands are on deck for coding child, that doesn't mean the needs of other kids/pts can continue to be ignored. Address them if you are literally free to do so.