"Nurses are so Mean" - page 9

I wish I had a dollar for every post I've read claiming that "nurses are so mean," "nurses are nasty to each other," "nurses eat their young" or "my preceptor is picking on me for no good reason." ... Read More

  1. by   joanna73
    I actually had to stop and read "to be honest, I've never met a nurse who wasn't mean-spirited" twice. Wow. I thought I read it wrong the first time. In my experience, I have met wonderful nurses. I am a new RN, and I have enjoyed my experiences thus far. What I have noticed, is that usually there is more to the story with people who characterize others as "mean". For example, I have recently been told by new grads that I am negative because I expressed my opinion that we should not be allowed to write the RN exam like 4 and 5 times. Negative? Mean? Please! Some people are just overly sensitive.
  2. by   Butterfliesnroses
    I've been a new nurse for 2 months. I've been treated fairly well. I have no c/o mistreatment. Sometimes I'll hear a snide comment but I ignore it or let it slide b/c I have bigger fish to fry than to worry is so-and-so is being mean to me. I worked there as a CNA for 6 yrs prior. I don't think that changes thing though. If I have a ?? I feel very comfortable asking it. I was trained by 4-5 ppl during my time b/c the position was open, so they couldn't have the same person train me.
  3. by   jh7350
    I agree. How you (as a person and professional) communicate, for example, will create the world you live in (which includes relationships). In any situation, assess the situation, and put a spin on it to make it positive...manage it. As a nurse, positive for me means use of empathy, therapeutic communication, and collaboration appropriately in the workplace as well as w/ patients. Energy spent in this way is more productive than energy used to create labels such as "eating their young", placing blame or feeling victimized. Afterall, if nurses can't talk to each other, who do you think suffers...patients?
  4. by   royhanosn
    dont get into heavy discussion on the internet! its similar to dont get into saving the world on a bar stool!
    99% of content on internet, no matter what form, is taken with a grain, or in other word, Boastful Statements, aka BS
  5. by   Grapenut
    I agree with your point that if everywhere you go you get treated with some degree of hostility, maybe you need to take a longer, harder look at yourself. But that's not to say that bullying doesn't happen in nursing. When I graduated, I worked PRN on a med-surg unit as there were no full-time positions at the time. The first full-time position that came open was on a different med-surg floor than the one I was working on. The floor where I was working PRN was great. My nurse manager was very supportive, the nurses I worked with were kind and supportive, with a couple of exceptions, and everybody knew who had the queen bee attitudes and just let it roll off. When I transferred to the other floor to take the full-time position, I jumped into a pit of vipers. The exception on that unit were the kind, supportive nurses, and the majority of them were bullies. It wasn't 'they had a bad day' because that was there modus operandi every day. And the nurse manager was the same. I've never had a problem getting along with people. Even the people that other people pick on because they think they're weird or whatever. But these nurses actually enjoyed attacking and tearing down other nurses, not just new grads but even nurses that were just new to that hospital, and especially if they were from out of state. They were like a pack of feral dogs looking for fresh meat. I was on that unit 14 months before I was able to transfer back to the unit where I started. During that time these nurses ran off several good nurses that saw the writing on the wall, that they were just going to get beat up by the mean girls on the playground every day, and there wasn't going to be any end to it. I tried to convince these nurses that they should try another unit, because they weren't all like this one. I knew this because of the experience I had on the floor I started on. But all of them just left the hospital and never looked back, and it was really the hospital's loss. When the administrative person in charge of a unit condones it, it is not going to change. I have met a few very squirrely people that in my opinion should not be nurses, and some of them may be the folks you speak of that get the bad treatment everywhere they go. But bullying in nursing is out there. If every place I worked was like that one horrible unit, I'd quit nursing and find another way to help people. Life is too short. I've worked at 2 other facilities since that first bad experience, and I've never had another negative experience on that level. But everywhere I go, there are always those with that tendency to be condescending or just plain bully others. Fortunately, they have not been in the majority.
  6. by   Mas Catoer
    All I can think from having nursing in my 29 year of service, is that, Nurses, just like other profession, always try to earn recognition for what we do (no matter how we conducted the work). Unfortunately, it is not an easy thing to earn it from other disciplines. So we push our nursing co-workers or subordinates to give one in all possible ways, even the nasty one. I'm not saying that I was one of the victims, but that was what I've been through. Well. If we nurses are willing to learn while working, we certainly shall earn all recognition we deserve by doing things much better each time. And, I believe that.....
  7. by   TERRYKOZ
    In reply to the excuse that nurses who are rude or mean maybe just having a bad day or some personal crisis. That is no excuse, Ive working in healthcare for over twenty years and have never been anything but pleasant, no matter what was going on in my personal life. A true professional leaves their problems at the door and puts on a smile.
  8. by   Ruby Vee
    Quote from terrykoz
    in reply to the excuse that nurses who are rude or mean maybe just having a bad day or some personal crisis. that is no excuse, ive working in healthcare for over twenty years and have never been anything but pleasant, no matter what was going on in my personal life. a true professional leaves their problems at the door and puts on a smile.
    maybe you actually were pleasant every single day, no matter what was going on in your personal life. or maybe you just thought you were. some of the most un-pleasant people i've encountered had no idea how they were perceived by others.
  9. by   PlatinolypusRN
    I can see both sides of this argument. Some nurses are indeed mean- Get used to it- Learn how to handle these situations effectively and move on. I think anyone getting into this profession had better develop some thick skin. On the other hand, when I was in school I got really tired of the incessant whining and sense of entitlement a lot of these younger students had. Just imagine what it's going to be like when an entire generation of self-absorbed kids raised on reality television come out of the nursing programs. Believe me, they are coming- Get used to it!
  10. by   notnursinganymore
    I wish I could agree with this article as it appears most others have however I really cannot. I worked as a travel contract RN, agency RN, as well as a staff RN (BSN from TWU) for over ten years. I have been in everything from Home Health to administration, and specialized in critical care. And I can tell you most nurses are mean. It's not the norm they are not. I remember working in a hospital in AZ as a contract/agency nurse. Sure, the staff nurses on the unit were supportive of each other. But because I was the "nurse making the big bucks" I was given the most difficult patient load...in fact two of those patients were strapped in their w/c at the nurses station. I had zero support or help, and the nurse techs gave their loyalty to the staff nurses. That was just one episode of this career I have gladly left behind. Staff work was equally challenging in that nurses were overloaded....nevermind working overtime. You were working overtime just showing up for your regular shift. By that I mean that it was not uncommon for me to have 12 patients on a tele floor. I recall one shift where I had 6 d/c & 6 admits. That's 12 different patients. There were also maybe two nurse techs on the floor and if they were feeding a patient...guess what....you get to do everything else in addition to charting, med pass, doctors orders, etc. And if you don't get it all done in premium time you are said to be inefficient with your time, can't prioritize, etc. Nurses from my generation (I am 52) are leaving by the droves for these reasons among too many others to mention here. I have lost a brother in law due to a heart attack at 45 from the ER stress, his son left cold turkey an ER as a nurse anethetist from the stress, my sister also an RN developed several chronic illnesses from the stress, and I have had nightmares for years from the unbelievable practices I witnessed to patients, mean patients, mean staff, mean administration.....yet I was blessed to have met a man I am now married to who rescued me from this. If I had known half of what I went through I would have NEVER become a nurse. I have met many other travel nurses who were traveling for the money to change careers. I have convinced my neice not to become a nurse. I have been in enough circumstances and time zones to work in all kinds of nursing situations, and there WAS NOT ONE worth crying over, losing your health over, going to school for, or anything else. If you are burned out, it's for a reason. It's not you. It's your body telling you to take care of you and get a life (your life) before it's too late.
  11. by   dawn36perry
    I personally think people can definitely be mean or insensitive. But, we all have bad hair days there isno doubt our egos get squashed inthe process. I really like what you said aboutlooking within though! You are totally right! Sometime we like to play the blame game too. Because it is easier to blame someone else than actually figure out how we can make it better. Thank you so much for your article it really helped me out of a pitiful slump......realizing I need to pray over my situation a little more carefully. Ahhhhh.....and what can I do to fix this or make it better.
  12. by   blueheaven
    And yet you are here posting notnursinganymore.
  13. by   notnursinganymore
    Yes, blueheaven, that is correct. For the first time in almost five years since I left nursing, I did a search to see what's out there in the form of educating would-be nurses (and those who are burned out) of the real personal risks they are taking as they make the leap of faith into a profession that may be calling them to their own demise. For many, this discovery isn't made until it's too late, i.e., my R.N. late brother in law. Had I known of many of the things I know now, I would have chosen another career to fulfill the desire to make a positive difference in people's lives. I went into nursing to help people, and I got out of it to save my own life. The purpose of this search which brought me to this blog is to educate anyone who wants to know what it really means to be on the floor, in administration, telemedicine, etc., as I have done it all, with many family members included, and many nurse co-workers across the USA. Now, after five years of healing from the burn-out stress, the difference I want to make is offering real information as I wish I would have had pre-nursing. It is my contribution for the many experiences I endured, and the reader may make their own assumption. Nevertheless, the information is available to truly help other people who want to know, and this blog is just the beginning.