I am at the point where I am truly considering quitting nursing school. I love helping and taking care of others, but I do not feel I am enjoying what I am doing. I've worked so hard to get here, but I just feel so miserable and depressed. I don't feel competent, lack confidence in my skills, I'm always afraid to speak up and participate in class/clinical, and I'm always thinking I am going to make a mistake. I am always anxious so I dread patient interaction sometimes, and my clinical instructor makes me feel I am not doing what I am supposed to do even when I truly am trying. I have been feeling so down lately and lost my motivation, and I failed my first Med/Surg exam. A classmate always asks me if I am okay and I put on a smile and say I am. I keep hoping something will click and I will snap out of this funk, but each day I feel worse. I was thinking of changing my major, but not sure what else to do at this point. I am losing sleep, developing poor eating habits, and just feel so crappy. I think a career indirectly helping patients may be better for me, but I am so afraid to take that step. I know I will disappoint so many people, especially family. I'm also afraid that I will drop out of nursing school and have so much regret. I read so many stories and posts about people hating nursing and wanting out. The stress, the demand, the lack of resources and staff, the overwhelming documentation just to save the facilities a**. I try and picture where I see myself working after graduating, and which area of nursing will be least stressful but still allow me to care for patients, but I haven't even graduated yet. Instead, I am here in my second semester thinking of all the ways I dislike what I am doing and my performance overall. I started counseling on campus, but it has been ineffective thus far. I wish to reach out to one of my professors, but I feel they may send me to the chairperson of the program or something for seeking advice and in turn, dismiss me from the program.
Am I the only student who feels this way? How can I get my motivation back? Is it my lack of confidence preventing me from succeeding, or is this profession just not right for me? Has anyone else considered changing their major?
