Managing Life Outside of School

[QueenAnnissa]

I am about to enter the 1st semester of an ADN program and I'm curious how others with families manage home life. I'm married with 4 children, a 13 y.o. son, a 9 y.o. son, a 5 y.o. daughter and a 1 y.o. daughter. My husband is self-employed and runs a small manufacturing business in the converted barn on our property. (So he's physically close by, most of the time.)

We live in a small farmhouse, that we love, but where nothing is level and something always needs to be fixed. I have been a stay at home mom for most of my children's lives. I currently am fortunate to be able to concentrate solely on school and family. I love school and enjoy learning, always have, and get a kick out of doing something finally that I've always wanted to do.

My question is: How do you keep up with your families and their needs and your home during the nursing program?

I have to clean everyday to keep up with all of us and there is laundry, dishes, dinner, grocery shopping, bath times and bedtime stories, football practice and dance class, teachers conferences and kids homework. (And a million other things, right?)

I have a supportive husband who does a lot with the kids, especially their extracurricular activities, and he likes cooking dinner. He's enormously busy with his business, although it does slow down some from November through February/March. But there is still a lot going on and basically I'm really the only one doing the assorted cleaning and keeping up with the constant clutter (and who cares if it gets done, by the way) and it's draining at times.

I've got my syllabus and course guide for the 1st semester and I am now truly aware of what I'm going to need to do to be successful over the next 2 years. I am just wondering how our not-so-little-family is going to survive this!

I also have managed studying and doing my schoolwork at a table in the den of our house, but it's right smack in the middle of everyone and there isn't truly a way to avoid the constant interruptions. (Which sucks when your rhythm is broken in the middle of a paper or learning a difficult microbiology concept, for instance.)

Sometimes I would wait until everyone went to bed but then I'm only good for a couple hours, at most, before I'm falling asleep at my desk. I also would occasionally get up at 5am and work for a few hours before everyone is up but I truly do not operate well without enough sleep. (who does, right?) Our small house doesn't give me many options for a study space, which sucks. And we live in a rural area that is about a half-hour from school, so there aren't a lot of places I could go for several hours at a time to study.

I guess I'm just trying to sort through this all in my head and comparing it to life during pre-reqs and we had some tough times here and there, but it wasn't ever too bad. I got the laundry done, made it to the football games and dance class, we had a homemade meal more often than not, even if it wasn't fancy. The house wasn't a complete disaster and it didn't feel like hubby and I were fighting more than usual, LOL!

I have a 3.8 GPA, and school has come easily to me so far. I was a supplemental instructor for A&P I and A&P II, I am the VP of our school's Health Professions Club, and I enjoy doing something I'm good at, who doesn't?! I think I'm in for a big shock when the nursing program begins because I've heard so often how much more difficult it is, how formerly 'A' student's grades drop and how differently you need to approach the material. (Critical thinking, application of knowledge, analysis and synthesis of material, etc.)

I guess mainly I'm worried that all these balls I have in the air are going to come crashing down. I know that I have an expectation for myself to continue to succeed in school, but is it going to come at a cost?

[Summer Days]

While I do not have a husband and children, I do have work responsibilities that present challenges. I work an hour away from where I live (I have tried to find work close by school and home but in vain). If I am to make it to work on time, I have to leave home 2 hours early because morning commute is awful and because the highway is a no go zone after approximately 5:30am daily. Usually I arrive to work within an hour then sit in my car and read my clinical companion book or drug cards till it's work time. Evening commute is even worse, taking a minimum of 2 hours of drive time. I bring all this up to point out how easy it is to lose valuable time that could be used for studying. After this realization, I started to stop by a nearby library after work and study for 2 -3 hours so that I could drive home when traffic had let up. Also each work day before I'm off to work, I manage to study and/or do chapter readings between 12am - 5am that way I have some stuff done because the temptation to want to sleep when I get home from work due to tiredness is always the strongest. On school days after lectures, I try to stay behind in the library to go over assignments for the following clinical day. I have support from my aunt who helps out where I cannot. That has been a key factor. There have been times when I've neglected doing house chores because either I am pressed for time or I am downright exhausted. I am in a BSN program in a quarter system (10 weeks of school each quarter for a 12 or more unit class load); this presents only marginal room for error!! Honestly, it'll trickle down to how much you want this and if you do, you will find a way and a rhythm that works for you. You can do it

[kpetit, ADN]

My husband and I have discussed already a deligation of what he will take over. Trying to prepare the 3 girls, but they are still young, the 7 year old somewhat understands and is reluctant of me being gone so much for scool, my 4 and 2 year old will find out soon enough. My husband seems to be on board and supportive. Well he better be I've pretty much been a single parent through a few long deployments. Anyways I just worry because he just got back from AFG and it sometimes takes him a year after a deployment to adjust back into civilian life. He's still active duty but thankfully will not be deploying anymore, Retirement yay. But anyways I pray he has the patience to stick to our game plan.

[RobinKinchen]

Hi,

I have applied and am hoping to begin an ADN program in Spring 2014. I am nervously trying to figure out how We will balance things. With my husband, 9-year-old daughter and 26-year-old brother with autism. You have all giving me some good ideas. I hope we will all be able to figure out how to balance life with school :-)

[PeppaPig]

I am in my second semester ASN program and I have a 3 year old. My husband has a demanding job, and is not able to help with her, nor does he like me to study on the weekend if he is home. One thing that helped me was a good set of noise canceling headphones. I record the lectures and play them back or at least listen to the tricky parts. I also put a show on the TV for my daughter, and slap the headphones on my ears so I can study. I have found tons of educational programs for her, so I don't feel too guilty. I got rid of a lot of clothes,toys,clutter etc to make clean up and laundry easier. I also got organized. For example her toy box has bins with photos on the front so she can clean up herself. We have changed our eating habits drastically. As SAHM I used to cook. Now we have sandwich night twice a week, breakfast night twice a week, soup night, and so on. I plan the breakfast and sandwich nights to be different each time, grilled ham cheese, frozen meatballs to make subs and such. I plan meals for the week and prepare a head as much as possible. On weekends i cook like crazy, and give everyone my undivided attention. The hardest thing has been giving up sleep. I get up 3 hours before everyone else to study, and I study when my girl naps. One more thing that helps is notecards or home made study guides that I can review in 10 to 15 minute bursts that I can do again and again. The most Important thing is to recognize things have changed, and they will not be perfect. Don't let it get you down. The payoff will be huge in the end. Good luck.

[pinkiepieRN]

If you don't already have one, get a dry erase calendar for the month and make sure you put big dates on there. Also, make sure you use a calendar, like Google Calendar and have an app for it on your phone. I find that I do best when I'm constantly reminded of what I've got going on and when. You can set up alerts or reminders and get them via text message or e-mail.

I've never used one, but I know about time management web browsers to keep the productivity up and distractions like Facebook and Wikipedia and allnurses down.

Reward yourself for doing "x" minutes of reading or completing an assignment early. Keep it up and condition yourself, so there's always a carrot dangling at the end in addition to a good grade or a job well done.

Plan your work. When you get an assignment or your syllabus, try to plot out a timeline for the task or at least think of a topic if it's an essay or paper that allows you to pick your own topic. Keep a log of ideas you have throughout the semester for ideas that you're interested in or you think might be applicable on a future assignment.

Of course, good sleep hygiene and smart eating habits are helpful, but do the best you can with what you have. Don't stretch yourself too far or beyond your means.

Good luck!

[nurseprnRN, BSN, RN]

I'm a great believer in having kids do more around the house. A four year old can set the table, and this leads the way to participating in the household at a higher level when s/he grows.

A six-year-old can throw laundry in the machine, add premeasured soap packets, and push the start button, then throw the wet things in the dryer and push the button. The advantage to that is that as they get older, there is no fuss over, "I don't have anything clean to wear!" because the answer is (and you will only have to say it once), "And whose fault is that?" It might be a little late for the 13-yr-old, but now is the time to say she takes complete responsibility for her own clothing; teach her how to iron a shirt and how to load a washer if she doesn't know already.

An eight-year-old can form hamburger patties and fry them, and put a package of frozen peas in the microwave, and pour the milk. Mine made their own sandwiches for school from first grade onward.

All of this while they see their mom working hard for school and doing a lot around the house too. Builds a foundation for a strong family when everyone works together to accomplish a goal.

[twins4paiges]

There are a lot of great ideas here. I graduated in May. I have twins who just turned 8. I set aside one night a week for family night. That night we always went out to chic-fil-a and then got a movie from redbox. I would often fall asleep during the movie due to that being a clinical day, but the kids were so excited to have one night a week just for them. I also got an old recliner for the corner of my bedroom and studied there.

[Nurse2B2016]

I'm a great believer in having kids do more around the house. A four year old can set the table, and this leads the way to participating in the household at a higher level when s/he grows.

A six-year-old can throw laundry in the machine, add premeasured soap packets, and push the start button, then throw the wet things in the dryer and push the button. The advantage to that is that as they get older, there is no fuss over, "I don't have anything clean to wear!" because the answer is (and you will only have to say it once), "And whose fault is that?" It might be a little late for the 13-yr-old, but now is the time to say she takes complete responsibility for her own clothing; teach her how to iron a shirt and how to load a washer if she doesn't know already.

An eight-year-old can form hamburger patties and fry them, and put a package of frozen peas in the microwave, and pour the milk. Mine made their own sandwiches for school from first grade onward.

All of this while they see their mom working hard for school and doing a lot around the house too. Builds a foundation for a strong family when everyone works together to accomplish a goal.

PREACH!!!! You are absolutely right. I plan to incorporate this when I get into the program. Bc what you say is oh so true

[Friskee, BSN, MSN]

My study habits have always been to study a little to a lot everyday. It cuts down my study time before tests, and it is easy to spend a little time every day on new/old material. It has worked to this point and I just started our program. I will let you know if it continues to work out!

[nurseprnRN, BSN, RN]

PREACH!!!! You are absolutely right. I plan to incorporate this when I get into the program. Bc what you say is oh so true

:) Don't wait. This advice isn't merely for people in nursing school. I promise you that anything you can do now to stave off hassles in adolescence later is worth its weight in gold.

My son and his wife have taught their two-year-old that after meals we "clean up," which in her case means picking up the food bits on the floor, putting them in the trash, and carrying her own (unbreakable) dishes to the sink. We do this at grandma's house too.

[Nurse2B2016]

:) Don't wait. This advice isn't merely for people in nursing school. I promise you that anything you can do now to stave off hassles in adolescence later is worth its weight in gold.

My son and his wife have taught their two-year-old that after meals we "clean up," which in her case means picking up the food bits on the floor, putting them in the trash, and carrying her own (unbreakable) dishes to the sink. We do this at grandma's house too.

Ohhhh Im starting tomorrow!!!! I feel so worn down by the end of the evening and my 5 year old can ABSOLUTELY lend a hand to help!

[Lady Santos]

Hats off to you for entering the nursing program! I know it is not easy having to balance school, work, family, and other personal circumstances. I will be completing a 4 year nursing program this year, so starting Tuesday, September 3rd, all that is left is 360 hours of preceptorship!

Since making the transition from the LPN to RN program back in April 2010, all I can say is that hard work = motivation, dedication, and perseverance are the requirements needed to successfully complete the nursing program. With 4 children (now 11, 7, and 5 year old twins) and a supportive husband, it is definitely possible. I am not saying it is easy, but it is doable!

This past 5 or 6 years (this includes the LPN program, pre-requisites, and the actual BSN program) has been a journey for everyone! Using a calendar/agenda/smartphones to organize your upcoming exams, tests, clinical schedule, your LIFE is definitely a must! You will learn that organization will be one of your best asset as a mom, student, and nurse!! I was able to maintain a clean home, assist and supervise the kids with their homework (while trying to complete my own as soon as the kids went to bed), and communicate with my husband through text and facebook. Lol For some people, this sounds like a sad reality of marriage but we are both tech-savy people and we knew that life will not be "peaches and cream" for our family of 6!

Just keep telling yourself that each semester, there is an end to all this. When that time comes, make-up for those sleepless nights and plan something special for you and your family. All the best to you and for those who are in the nursing program!