Dear Nursing Students/Orientees: A Love Note from the Preceptor from Hell - page 5

Warning: The following post is rife with brutal honesty and frustration. Read at your own risk. Memorandum from the desk of Your Friendly Neighborhood Sociopath~~ Dear Nursing... Read More

  1. Visit  roser13 profile page
    2
    Wish I had the time to tally up the responses between those who get it and those who don't. Just reading responses over the course of the last 24 hours makes me think that those who do get the OP outnumber those who don't and consequently think that OP is an old battleax.
    CheesePotato and creativemom like this.
  2. Visit  jetsy62 profile page
    2
    Probably a really dumb question but I am going to ask. Does a nurse have a choice in being a preceptor? Is this something you choose to do or is it just part of the the job?
  3. Visit  ThePrincessBride profile page
    6
    Quote from BlueDevil,DNP
    This is how precepting should be done, every time.

    If you can't take it, be a candy stripper.
    No. It shouldn't. I don't believe in a "one size fits all" philosophy. Some people need a type A, militant, "break 'em" preceptor like the OP. Others, like myself, respond better to a more Type B preceptor.
    mharzi, dclong, neverbethesame, and 3 others like this.
  4. Visit  ThePrincessBride profile page
    9
    Quote from roser13
    Wish I had the time to tally up the responses between those who get it and those who don't. Just reading responses over the course of the last 24 hours makes me think that those who do get the OP outnumber those who don't and consequently think that OP is an old battleax.
    It is not about "getting" or "not getting" the OP but rather disagreeing with her "tough love" approach.

    I have had some clinical instructors like the OP and I pray I don't get someone who acts like I'm a soldier in combat military school.

    But I've noticed in general that women are so unnecessarily difficult on other women to the point that it lacks productivity. Not saying that all nurses are women, but it is a female dominated field, or that all women are like this. But I find women in general to be far nastier to each other than men.
    Last edit by ThePrincessBride on Dec 5, '12
    mharzi, dclong, lorirn58, and 6 others like this.
  5. Visit  anggelRN profile page
    7
    There is a difference between not understanding and not agreeing.
    mharzi, Not_A_Hat_Person, dclong, and 4 others like this.
  6. Visit  roser13 profile page
    1
    It usually depends upon alot of things: the facility's procedures, staffing issues, and sometimes just plain who's available. I've even heard of new RN's (less than a year of experience) being told that it's their "turn" to take an orientee.

    And that's unfortunate. Precepting shouldn't be forced on anyone. People like the OP obviously have vested time and energy into their orientees and want to help them succeed. Others who are forced into the role often fail miserably (on purpose?).

    Quote from jetsy62
    Probably a really dumb question but I am going to ask. Does a nurse have a choice in being a preceptor? Is this something you choose to do or is it just part of the the job?
    CheesePotato likes this.
  7. Visit  RNperdiem profile page
    3
    If this poster was a man precepting another man in a male-dominated profession, law enforcement for example, would this post be controversial?
    anotherone, CheesePotato, and somenurse like this.
  8. Visit  ThePrincessBride profile page
    3
    Quote from RNperdiem
    If this poster was a man precepting another man in a male-dominated profession, law enforcement for example, would this post be controversial?
    Can't compare law enforcement to nursing.
    lorirn58, CheesePotato, and anggelRN like this.
  9. Visit  mclennan profile page
    10
    Believe me, I "get" the OP - all too well. I have seen, experienced and heard about time and time again, that style of precepting in nursing. It is pervasive and dominant and leaves very little not to "get" about it, even to non medical people.

    I just don't like it. I'm a revisionist who thinks we need to explore different approaches that serve the profession and therefore the patients better. This militaristic method of mentorship makes many new nurses bitter and angry way before their time, and that is tragic.
    mharzi, Not_A_Hat_Person, silenced, and 7 others like this.
  10. Visit  blissfulnurse profile page
    3
    Your posting was both courageous and (sometimes brutally) honest. While my approach to leading and precepting is softer, in the end we're all trying to keep ourselves and the patients safe. In the process, we have to develop a little tougher shell and look at the big picture. I wish there had been better preceptors for me who either withdrew their sharp claws they unsheathed just for the joy of it, or gave me a swift kick in the seat when I needed it. There always has to be a balance. It's called tough love.
    Rensoul, CheesePotato, and rnamelia like this.
  11. Visit  WanderingSagehen profile page
    7
    Nice vent BUT... hey we all learn in different ways and at different rates. You sound burned out, seems like a reflection of the times rather than the fault of the students. Great teachers have different methods, yours sounds full of ego, I think I had a preceptor like you and it made for a negative experience. How about a little adaptation to the mentee, its not easy from that side either. Sorry you are so burdened by the all your wonderful experience that you must share. (but it sounds like you don't share the information). Get over yourself- part of your job is training new grads. Pardon my honest opinion.
    mharzi, lorirn58, daverika, and 4 others like this.
  12. Visit  creativemom profile page
    11
    When did it become acceptable that "abuse" in nursing, is acceptable?

    You can do all of the above without the hard nose and still help precept a great RN. Really, I see it all the time where I work.

    I agree you shouldn't have to coddle folks, but you don't have to have a itch attitude either. Attitudes don't make the nurse, rather skill, hands-on experience, knowledge, critical thinking, etc does. What you foster is what you'll be breeding on the floor. I very much would dislike working with such hostile attitudes.
    mharzi, dclong, silenced, and 8 others like this.
  13. Visit  FlorenceNtheMachine profile page
    7
    The best teachers I have been kind and honest about performance. The worst ones have been mean, unhappy with their station in life, and selfish when it came to sharing knowledge. I'm not one of those that need a trophy for successfully clocking in right. But I feel like if you are taking the responsibility of being a preceptor, you are also taking the responsibility of being a teacher as well. I don't know why those are two separate entities, based on the original post.

    It sounds that the OP may have preceptor fatigue, and may need to take a break from it. It would be hard to be in constant teacher mode. You teach enough to the patients and their family everyday!
    mharzi, silenced, lorirn58, and 4 others like this.


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