I think I got fired

Nurses General Nursing

Published

This is probably more a vent but I could use some advice and maybe a kind word.

Well this week couldnt get any worse. First of all I called out of my LTC job Monday because I found out my father had a stroke. Thankfully he is ok but he does need another surgery on his arteries in his neck.

Today is a whole other story. My husband and I have been stressed because he is out of a job and a million other things. So unfortunately we went at it today before I left for work. I was so upset that I was making myself sick. Well, I think we are calling it quits. Things are not working out and his priorities are not his son and I. I called into work and told them I had a family emergency and I couldnt leave my son. He is 2 1/2 years old and he knows something isnt right. My husband would probably completely ignore the poor child if I went to work so my son is more important than my job.

I called the nursing supervisor and her answer to me was" well, you better come up with a better excuse than that if you want to continue to keep working here." I said fine and hung up.

This place is just a mad house. One of the LPN's didnt want to stay there anymore last night and we all caught him calling his wife asking her to call with an emergency. She calls and says she tripped over the dog and broke her leg so he needs to come home.

They wont fire him over something that stupid but they will fire me because I have an actual family crisis? What is with that?

I am going in tomorrow to turn in my keys and I am just hoping maybe someone with show some sympathy and tell me I can stay.

Was I wrong about calling in this way? Maybe I should have lied and said I had the flu instead of being honest? Please let me know what you think.

The keys are to the storage rooms. Sorry about that. I went to the DON today and she was a little angry because I called so late. But she was understanding. I explained everything to her and she said she would take me off the schedule until I can get my life situated.

I dont know if that is going to happen anytime soon. I went to military housing today and found out that we are going to have to owe $4000 in back rent because my husband sat on his butt and didnt want to get a job while waiting to get back into the military. The bills are stacking up and fast. Worst thing is that we may have to be out of here by then end of the month. I need to go see the housing director to see if they are kicking us out or if they could be so kind and let us stay.

I have had enough. I cannot take the neglect and immaturity of my husband anymore. My son and I are the ones paying for it.

We shall see what the month brings. My father went to see the surgeon today and hopefully we dont hear any bad news.

I know this might seem odd but I would appreciate if you all could find it in your hearts and pray for my son and I. I know there are people out there that have bigger problems in life but I would appreciate it.

Thanks to everyone who wrote back. Sheri

Specializes in ORTHOPAEDICS-CERTIFIED SINCE 89.

Bless you Sheri and your son. Your husband is acting almost like a gambling addict...There are groups that address those compulsions. Check with the base psychologist.

Do you quallify for military legal aid? Perhaps a sit down with a lawyer may turn his mind to what is important. I'm happy you did not lose your job. Do you have family close by? Prayers abounding for Sheri's family.

Sheri, you definitely have my prayers going out to you and your son. It is easy for someone to tell you to stick with a marriage, but until you actually experience a bad marriage, you don't know. Best of luck to you!

Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.

Sending you all the positive vibes I can. You need to be able to build a good and stable life for you and your child. If your spouse is unable and unwilling to do his part..........I think you know the right thing to do is whatever produces the best environment for your little boy, so follow your heart. After a rough time like this the good stuff really feels great so hang in there.

Many Good thoughts to you. I am glad that you talked to your DON and got that particular stressor situatied for the time being. Good luck to you and your son. I have been in a similar situation with my ex (overspending and other addictions). We have been divorced now since 1999. It is hard to face all of these crises on your own. We are here for you and hope to hear from you soon.

My prayers are with you. Know that "this too shall pass." Your best bet is to find some supportive friends who you can talk too--that's what got me through so much.

Right now, just keep putting one foot in front of the other, and eventually you'll find yourself in a better place.

Sheri many Prayers are coming your way. I am not familiar with the military, but are there any womens groups or shelters that can assist you. They may have some resources or know who to contact to help you.

In our town, there is a womens shelter that deals with these crisis and have excellent resources to utelize.

I'm wishing you the very best of luck and I will keep you in my Prayers.

HUGS!

MaryRose

Specializes in ER!.

Of course you are in our prayers, and there is nothing odd about asking for them when you need them!

As awful as divorce is, a miserable marriage is worse, and when you also have a child to consider, finding the right decision can be so tough. But everything you've written has indicated that your heart is in the right place, and listening to it, I believe, will not lead you wrong.

Nursing can sometimes be a hard field in which to find a lot of perks or advantages, but the fact is, if you need to find another job, you'll be able to. Jobs, for us, can be replaced with relative ease. While there are aspects of my job that I'd miss if I left, I know that nothing holds a candle to the people in my life that I love.

I hate to chime in with the posters who say that telling the truth is not always the best policy, but the fact is, every one of them is right. The people who determine the continuation of our employment cannot always be relied upon to judge each situation objectively and appreciate honesty, and I've learned that the hard way myself. And in no way does this inablity/unwillingness obligate you to shoot yourself in the foot. So if you can't do the right thing in black and white, then do what's right for you and go on. Most of the time all we can do is make do the best we can with the material we have to work with, anyway, be it jobs or friends or husbands.

Just my $0.02, with prayers and hugs as well.

Specializes in Utilization Management.

Sheri, I do sympathize and I have to add that what TriageRN said is very true:

I guess it comes down to what each persons personal priorites are. Mine is my family to the extreme and would burn my RN license if it came down to a choice between them and my career (although that would be very hard, and very sad!!!). To me I am nothing without them...and I need them as much as they need me. There may be a day I will need to be there more than my career...and I will answer that call, and hopefully my employer will understand, and if not...so be it.

I had a family emergency that caused me to leave my job a few years ago. Surprisingly enough, a better job came along after I quit that one. I worked agency in between, but I was only out of work for a couple of months.

I'm very happy where I am now, and one of the reasons is that they understand that family comes first.

I can offer no wisdom about your marriage, only prayers. But please know that you have much support here.

Specializes in Critical Care.

You don't need to lie, you had a true family emergecy. We must remember that work is only a job but you must take care of your child first. Why not try agency , you will double your salary and can work when you want to. Good luck to you.

I just wanted to tell you that you are in my prayers!! I have a friend that has been going through the samething with her husband. She finaly just gave it all to GOD and let him work it out. He has since rededacated his life and even though he still likes to play the games he is now spending time with his wife and kids. God can work through ANYTHING!! I know it is hard but make your choices with God's will in mind!!! As for your job when one door closes God usually has a better one ready to open.

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