How do I get over this?

  1. I had a very good job at a very prestigious hospital. Unfortunately, I had a bad year, I was depressed soo bad, I called offf alot, even took a couple months on FMLA. After I used all those FMLA days, I still called out alot. They were very patient with me, but, a new manager came in, and I was terminated,,,,, after being sent home by occupational health, and taking subsequent days off.....This job was perfect. It was great money, all the OT i wanted when i wanted it, benefits perfect, I moved closer to be near it, everything. Now I am in a very small community hospital where they send you home on a regular basis, because they just dont have the volume , the benefits are three times what i was paying, and they suck...... has anybody been in this situation? I am just heartbroken, and I cant beleive I lost this job. I feel like a loser, and I desperately want to be in a level 1 trauma center again. Any advice or words of wisdom? Please?
  2. Visit RNOTODAY profile page

    About RNOTODAY

    Joined: Jan '06; Posts: 1,071; Likes: 451
    operating room RN; from US
    Specialty: 8 year(s) of experience in NICU, ER, OR


  3. by   HappyWife77
    I would work on yourself first while you have the other job. Then after you get yourself stable, you can try your desired job again. Best wishes to you.
  4. by   RNOTODAY
    How do you mean, exactly, happywife?
  5. by   Nascar nurse
    I assume she means get your depression treated and whatever other issues that caused you to call out resolved. Unless that is truly fixed, you will likely keep running into the same troubles.
  6. by   CP2013
    Quote from RNOTODAY
    How do you mean, exactly, happywife?
    I believe she meant to work on your mental health concerns be they depression or anxiety. Because you were so miserable while working at the great job, evaluate what caused you to need to take all the time off, FMLA, and call off work.

    Also, find out from the big hospital if you have been deemed "ineligible for rehire" because of these time and attendance issues. Working there again may not even be an option depending on their policies.

    It almost sounds like a tale of "the grass isn't always greener" but truly take the time to evaluate what made you feel so depressed and how you plan to manage this when moving to a large hospital. Also be sure you have a desirable amount of consistent recent experience (even if its at the small hospital) so that you are marketable in this tough economy.

    Best of luck in your pursuits and for your overall mental health.
  7. by   RNOTODAY
    Oh,ok, I understand now.... yes, I am on medication and I am in a better emotional state of mind now. I also have learned my lesson about calling in.......although, at the time, I didnt see it as a choice to call in, I was simply sick.. mentally...... I dont expect to go back to that employer, I just dont see it happening. Im just soooo heartbroken over what happened, embarrassed, and feel like i totally blew it (well,, i did) this was a place I was at for 7 years, and I planned to retire from. I am just hoping to get into a larger hospital, but there are just no openings to even apply for lately, I have a very obscure specialty ... so I guess I am lucky to have a job at all..... but Im just disgusted with my husband totally resents me for even being depressed and losing that cash cow of a job. and all the OT I was doing... which MAY have been contributing to the depression, idk.
  8. by   Psychcns
    You might want to get some psychotherapy to help you sort everything out and be successful at the new job. Best wishes.
  9. by   RNOTODAY
    Psychcns... i simply dont know where to begin......
  10. by   llg
    Sometimes, there is no quick solution to our problems. We simply have to endure a period of hardship ... work through it ... and come out the other side. I think that is what you are going to have to do now. You will probably need to stay at your current job for a while as you build up a positive employment record and professional reputation. If you can't handle that emotionally, you will need to seek counselin/mental health treatment/etc. to help you get through it.

    After you have rebuilt your professional reputation and job history (which might take a couple of years) ... then you can seek a job somewhere else that is more desirable to you. The important thing now is that you don't let your current emotional distress derail your current job. That would only hurt your professional reputation even more. So you need to direct your energies into succeeding at your current job and remaining emotionally healthy.

    I hope you find peace of mind soon.
  11. by   Psychcns
    Also, call the person who is prescribing your
    medication, tell him/her you are still depressed
    and you would like a referral for counseling. You
    do not have to suffer alone. Give yourself
    time to heal..
  12. by   Guttercat
    I'm so sorry.

    Life (and all its variables) goes in ebbs and flows, and sometimes the "flows" don't always jibe with our "ebbs." Life can hit hard, and Murphy's Law dictates that the hard times occur at the most inopportune of moments.

    Take your situation and make lemonade out of lemons. This experience may just be the impetus needed to push you beyond what you previously considered your limits. Anyone who is human and has spent any length of time in the adult world, has most likely experienced periods of extreme trial. You are not alone.

    And, yes, I am glad you learned your lesson about calling in. Please don't take advantage of it. Keep in mind that almost everyone you work with has a multitude of difficulties, tragedies ,and stresses in their own lives at any one time. Reserve "calling in" for times when you cannot walk more than 50 feet without passing out.
  13. by   CharleeFoxtrot
    Quote from Psychcns
    Also, call the person who is prescribing your
    medication, tell him/her you are still depressed
    and you would like a referral for counseling. You
    do not have to suffer alone. Give yourself
    time to heal..
    This absolutely.
  14. by   HappyWife77
    Yes I just meant to take of you. I hope your husband can let go of the resentment and push for your health rather than a cash cow job. Maybe try to find a support group where you share with others that are going through similar struggles.