FollowUp to "Things You Wish You Could Say To Your Coworkers"

Nurses General Nursing

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So how many of you actually do nicely, calmly, but maturely and professionally speak your mind at work? And how is it received?

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Specializes in ICU, telemetry, LTAC.

Not too long after I posted on the other thread, I worked with a relatively new nurse who is... umm, a bit unorganized. Good intentions, not much framework.

He's trying to talk to a doctor. He's chosen to put his charts and notes and MAR's in a corner where there is not a phone. So he's on the phone by my computer and each time the long-suffering doc asks a question, he has to run four feet backwards and get the answer. When he was done, I looked him square in the eye and said, "ok now get your things and sit there." Pointed to an empty spot with a phone and computer and plenty of space. He did. The night got better. I continued to give advice (who am I kidding, orders was more like it) and we had a good night. I told him I didn't want to seem like a witch but he needed better habits and I wasn't criticizing him personally, so please don't take it that way. He said he was okay with it.

We had a good moment of laughter when I told him that if I was still doing charge on this unit in 10 years I'd be white headed, with my glasses held on by a string and some duct tape, barking orders at every newbie I could find... "sit there!" "restrain that patient!" "blahblahblah!" Ahhhhh god I hope not 'cause that's not how I see myself. It was interesting to break my regular mold of just helping the newer ones instead of telling them how to get it done more efficiently themselves.

Edit: But have I told my coworker to wash his pants? no.

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I think it depends on who it is said to. There is another nurse who graduated the same time as I did, different schools, who started the same time as I did, who occasionally does some really dumb things. I know we all have our moments, but when I mentioned to her after she told me in report that she put a NG tube down a patient (n/v x 24 hours) that feeding him a full meal afterwards (w/ the NG tube hanging out his nose on intermittent suction) may not have been the best decision in the world, she just cocked her head, blinked her eyes, and said, "Why in the world not? He hasn't been able to keep anything down for over a day, doesn't he need food?" This is the same nurse who will start report with "Wow, I've had such an easy day, I really had a lot of downtime!" Yet leaves you with IVs to change out, dressings that should have been changed, charting not done, etc. When this is mentioned to her, she again cocks her head, blinks her eyes, looks a little confused, and says "Well, if I don't get something done, you have PLENTY of time to do it at night." I explained to her that the fact that it didn't get done isn't really the issue, it's that it didn't get done when she was talking about all the time she spent that day sitting and doing nothing.

Personally, this nurse is a real sweetie. I just despise picking patients up from her because there is always *something* either done incorrectly or not done at all. I am keeping my fingers crossed because she has just accepted a transfer from our busy step-down unit to L/D. She says she doesn't like the "gross stuff" associated with nursing. I really wanted to ask her if she has ever *seen* a baby born! *grin* I wish her the best, and I'm sure she'll find her niche.

Really, I think it's the way something is said that can make all the difference. One of the day nurses ran Potassium IV on one of the patients I have tonight, but didn't run it w/ NS, so of course, the IV went bad, the patient wasn't comfortable when it was going in (but that was before I got there so I couldn't do anything about it by the time I got in.) Hopefully the patient won't need more potassium tomorrow, but I plan on mentioning to the day nurse that she might want to consider running some normal saline with it and why.

I think you can phrase messages (even if it's a "you really screwed up" type of message) in ways that can be easier to take and not make the person receiving the message feel like a total moron. I know I've received criticism both ways, and I have remembered the constructive messages a lot better. Knowing the "why" behind doing something makes it easier for me to remember to do it. Also, if you have a critique, I think it helps to also have something nice to say. (As in, "Thanks for doing this, but I don't know if you realized that this other thing got missed.") I do think it can be harder to come up with the something nice to say if the things that are wrong seem to predominate. *grin*:lol2:

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Specializes in cardiology-now CTICU.

no, i value my source of income :lol2:

i'll just hang on for long enough and then find something else...

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
so how many of you actually do nicely, calmly, but maturely and professionally speak your mind at work? and how is it received?

how is it received? it depends.

if you're addressing a mature and professional coworker, it's usually received well. but there are some people that you just can't tell anything, regardless of how nicely. i refer to them as the crybabies -- any negative feedback makes them burst into tears and run to the manager claiming that "so and so is being mean to me!"

i actually witnessed this at work last weekend. persephone had called in sick every one of her weekend shifts for 3 months. she showed up for work last saturday, and was in a pretty chipper mood until about noon when she started complaining that this hurt and that hurt because she'd had a procedure earlier in the week and she really didn't feel well and should go home. the charge nurse (let's call her antigone) asked her what procedure she'd had done (in a calm, pleasant tone of voice) and persephone jumped up and snarled at her "that's none of your damned business, and if you persist in asking me personal questions i'll have you in the manager's office so fast your lips will still be flapping."

whoa! i was just around the corner, and although antigone knew i was there, persephone did not. persephone then went on to shout "you're just the charge nurse, you're not my boss. my personal life is none of your damned business, and you know it. you don't care about me, so why are you even asking?" antigone moved the conversation to the supply room with the door shut, so i didn't hear the rest. but on monday the story came back to me: "did you hear that antigone attacked persephone in the nurse's station in front of everyone? antigone was so mean to her, she made persephone cry!"

first off, i was the only person around, and persephone didn't even know i was there. second, the only attack i heard was where persephone attacked antigone. third, the only meanness or disrespect i heard was persephone going off on antigone. i did see persephone crying, though -- not for any good reason that i could ascertain.

antigone would have been in trouble for "attacking" persephone, had i not written up what i observed and turned it in.

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Specializes in Tele, ICU, ER.

Ruby,

Glad you turned in your observations! High maintenance folks like that can drive anyone up the wall!

I have one co-worker who always has to be right - no matter what -and when she's in charge, she's not only right, but also in the "respect my authoritai!" mood. Hard to deal with, you can't converse, because it always turns into a complaint to the boss about how "no one listens to me". To the point where we won't let triage put a patient in one of our beds unless we "clear" it with her, even if its the only bed available. Drives us all bananas, but she's buddies with the boss. The boss, however, is very savvy, and likes to point out that she can't "write people up just on opinion". LOVE my boss, but this co-worker is getting on all of our nerves but no one wants to say anything, in case it risks our job.

There's one or two on every unit. Guess we just have to deal.

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how is it received? it depends.

if you're addressing a mature and professional coworker, it's usually received well. but there are some people that you just can't tell anything, regardless of how nicely. i refer to them as the crybabies -- any negative feedback makes them burst into tears and run to the manager claiming that "so and so is being mean to me!"

i actually witnessed this at work last weekend. persephone had called in sick every one of her weekend shifts for 3 months. she showed up for work last saturday, and was in a pretty chipper mood until about noon when she started complaining that this hurt and that hurt because she'd had a procedure earlier in the week and she really didn't feel well and should go home. the charge nurse (let's call her antigone) asked her what procedure she'd had done (in a calm, pleasant tone of voice) and persephone jumped up and snarled at her "that's none of your damned business, and if you persist in asking me personal questions i'll have you in the manager's office so fast your lips will still be flapping."

whoa! i was just around the corner, and although antigone knew i was there, persephone did not. persephone then went on to shout "you're just the charge nurse, you're not my boss. my personal life is none of your damned business, and you know it. you don't care about me, so why are you even asking?" antigone moved the conversation to the supply room with the door shut, so i didn't hear the rest. but on monday the story came back to me: "did you hear that antigone attacked persephone in the nurse's station in front of everyone? antigone was so mean to her, she made persephone cry!"

first off, i was the only person around, and persephone didn't even know i was there. second, the only attack i heard was where persephone attacked antigone. third, the only meanness or disrespect i heard was persephone going off on antigone. i did see persephone crying, though -- not for any good reason that i could ascertain.

antigone would have been in trouble for "attacking" persephone, had i not written up what i observed and turned it in.

love the names you come out with, ruby.:lol2:

do you think the only reason that antigone didn't wind up in communications class with hortense had to do with the fact persephone's w/e call offs are already an issue with the manager?

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Specializes in ER.
she put a NG tube down a patient (n/v x 24 hours) that feeding him a full meal afterwards (w/ the NG tube hanging out his nose on intermittent suction) may not have been the best decision in the world, she just cocked her head, blinked her eyes, and said, "Why in the world not? He hasn't been able to keep anything down for over a day, doesn't he need food?"

So the chewed stuff coming back out didn't give her a clue. :uhoh21:

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Specializes in ER/AMS/OPD/UC.

I have had several instances of being belittled by a ward clerk that I really want to pull my hair out. She is the type of person who makes snide comments while walking away from you and her mood changes every five minutes.

I am frustrated mainly because I have not confronted her yet. Just a few days ago I was arranging transport on a commercial flight for a post op patient (less than 72 hours) and her husband. Typically we dont fly out patients spouses, but she was being discharged early, and he was going to escort her. The ward clerk said "well that is really pushing it." I siad it was appriopiate and there was a doctor order, all she had to do was fax the request to travel. Then she says, "Well you are incapable of understanding it." (while walking away). I just said yeah right. I was upset but tired from the long shift.

Now it is a couple of days later and I am furious and fed up. This is not the first time she has made snide comments like this and I am really tired of it. Everyone else puts up with it.

How would you handle this?

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Well, I don't have a rep. as a floormat!

My complaints conserned a REALLY foul-mouthed co-worker - and if it makes me cringe, it's gotta be bad! I tolerated it for awhile, but now everytime she starts I say something - sometimes half-jokingly - but she's gotten the message. I've threatened to take her in the bathroom with a bar of soap, etc.

The other complaint that I posted was about lateness, and the nurses that follow me - yes, I've said something! And one day the one that is the absolute WORST was actually 2 minutes early - I made a HUGE deal out of that!;) Embarressed her and all that - I don't care. She's been on time since!

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how is it received? it depends.

if you're addressing a mature and professional coworker, it's usually received well. but there are some people that you just can't tell anything, regardless of how nicely. i refer to them as the crybabies -- any negative feedback makes them burst into tears and run to the manager claiming that "so and so is being mean to me!"

i actually witnessed this at work last weekend. persephone had called in sick every one of her weekend shifts for 3 months. she showed up for work last saturday, and was in a pretty chipper mood until about noon when she started complaining that this hurt and that hurt because she'd had a procedure earlier in the week and she really didn't feel well and should go home. the charge nurse (let's call her antigone) asked her what procedure she'd had done (in a calm, pleasant tone of voice) and persephone jumped up and snarled at her "that's none of your damned business, and if you persist in asking me personal questions i'll have you in the manager's office so fast your lips will still be flapping."

whoa! i was just around the corner, and although antigone knew i was there, persephone did not. persephone then went on to shout "you're just the charge nurse, you're not my boss. my personal life is none of your damned business, and you know it. you don't care about me, so why are you even asking?" antigone moved the conversation to the supply room with the door shut, so i didn't hear the rest. but on monday the story came back to me: "did you hear that antigone attacked persephone in the nurse's station in front of everyone? antigone was so mean to her, she made persephone cry!"

first off, i was the only person around, and persephone didn't even know i was there. second, the only attack i heard was where persephone attacked antigone. third, the only meanness or disrespect i heard was persephone going off on antigone. i did see persephone crying, though -- not for any good reason that i could ascertain.

antigone would have been in trouble for "attacking" persephone, had i not written up what i observed and turned it in.

ruby - i'm so glad that you heard what you did and were able to bear witness!

how do people like that get away with it? she's called in every weekend - as far as i'm concerned, she should be fired!

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Specializes in Psychiatric.

For me it depends on the person and the situation...if it's a person I KNOW is gonna start crying, etc...it's just not worth it as far as I'm concerned...however, if it's a situation that directly affects patient safety, I hope they've got their big girl knickers on 'cause I can't keep my trap shut! lol But I'm not rude...just very matter-of-fact...

I did eventually have to intervene with my co-worker who was ALWAYS on the phone at the Pyxis machine...her response at the time was 'Well I'm not hurting you, am I?' My response was 'Not really, but you are holding me up, and there's no way you can be totally focused on what drugs you're taking out if you're talking to Sweetie.' So she now calls him at the nurse's station before med pass...and when med pass is finished...and before lunch...and after lunch...and before report...and after report...*sigh*...

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